Mood Disorder

[AddictivePersonality212]

well i recently went to a hospital where i got sent to a psychiatric ward where i stayed for 10days The reason why i got sent their was bc of my cutting addiction and my anxiety attacks. the psychiatric their put me on abilify stating that he felt that i had a mood disorder and he was putting me on it because it has a mood stabilizing element to it. now i think that i made him diagnose me like that on purpose bc ive been reading all about bi polar disorder but i might not be really bi polar... idk im really confused i stopped taking the medication that i was on for a week but im not sure what to do
so can someone tell me about bi polar disorder and abilify bc im scared to take this i dont think my conditions that serious i kinda used my theatrics to help me get a diagnosis but now i dont want a label uhm yea im really complicated but yea some one help!!

and is  mood disorder like an aka for bi polar?

[triedeverymed]

Abilify is also FDA approved for major depression. I take it and it puts me on an even keel. I have a mood disorder with some bipolar traits. It also helped with my anxiety when no other drug would work. I love Abilify, it saved me! You have to take it at least 2-3 weeks before you see a difference. I would re-visit the psychiatrist and be honest about your feeling and see what he/she says. you want the right diagnosis so you can get the right meds and start to get well again. If you're cutting, then there is something pretty serious going on you need to address. please seek a 2nd opinion so you can get well, you deserve it!!

[AddictivePersonality212]

i think im a mental hyperchondriac but i believe that their is a deeper problem so i may have borderline personality disorder ive been reading up on it and i can connect almost all of the symptoms with me. yet im obsessive, manipulative, lie in order to get what i want sometimes i dont care if i just use people and dispose of them which may be a sociopath's behavior i like getting into peoples head and if they hurt me or dare to go against me ill toy with their heads get revenge, the smallest things **** me off and i may over react. i have obsessive thinking and hair pulling and constant anxiety. i always have to have a mirror with myself that i cant put down. ive had fantasies of being a powerful person with special powers and love when people fear me, but i also dont want to be abandoned and need to constantly have someone adore me or love me, im codependent. get really upset when people cant hang out with me im a  jealous person. yes so im not sure if im a mental hypochondriac and or if im a sociopath and have borderline personality disorder. now i make alot of friends all the time but i cant keep long term relationships or friendships. my frienships never last long, and i often hurt the ones that love me the most.

[AshleyBaker]

I agree with Jay. I had a hard time staying on my medications when I was misdiagnosed with ADHD...even tho he knew I was bipolar. I would drive my other doctor insane because I would start the vicious cycle of feeling better, coming off the meds, feeling bad, going back on the meds...coming off....oh it went on and on...BTW, that's bad to do....going on and off psych meds. I was in just shy of 35 when I gave into the idea that something REALLY was wrong and I needed to deal with it head on.

I had just got a new job a year earlier and I thought I would try out a new psychiatrist. This guy is good. He pitched the ADHD idea and diagnosed me with Bipolar II. The second I started becoming noncompliant with my meds, he got mad and told me that HE was there to help me and couldn't if I didn't want the help. The medications help you to live a satisfying, sane life. Without the meds, I'm a mess. I nearly lost my new job because of one of my manic phases. Now controlled, I have very few outbursts at work.

I like what Jay and Crystlas said....They're right!

Best wishes!

Ashley

[Crystlas]

Does what Jay said not totally back up what I have been trying to tell you??  We are here to help so please listen!  As far as medications, he is right there too!  You have to stick with your medication to see if it helps.  You also have to take it every day for it to work.  Alot of bipolars stop taking meds when they feel better and don't realize that is why they do feel better.  After they stop, it is even harder to re-stabilize!

[JayDiddy]

Sweetie, If I was you I would not worry about the label and just try the meds and see if they make you feel better. They might take a few weeks before they really start working.

Just an idea.....I have been following your posts and hope you both get the help you need, and accept it. From my experience, escaping on drugs etc will just compound your problems in later life. But if you stop and fight for your mental health now, life will be so much better. I know you are young but I can tell you are VERY SMART. What it takes is finding the right people/groups to help. Can you check with your school counselor?

There are youth groups that you can meet others that want help too & lead yourself down a better life. I think you will be OK once you gain the help of the right adults that care, even if it is not your parents. I went through similar stuff but had to wait too long and complicate my life. I hope you don't have to do this.

Take care,
Jay

[Crystlas]

Here are some links for you to read up on bipolar disorder.  

www.bipolarhelpcenter.com

www.moodswing.org

www.nami.org

[Crystlas]

I back up DLA, she is one smart lady and we have been sharing knowledge for a bit of time on this forum.  You are a lovely young lady and I can not imagine why you would put yourself through what you do.  I have met a few bipolars whom also suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder (cutters are BPD).  So either you are a compulsive liar or a very hurt individual with lots of problems and issues.  Where are your parents in all of this?  Why do you want to hurt your body with drugs, cutting and alcohol when your life is just beginning? Being the social worker I am, I am intrigued by what story you have to share.  You write very profoundly for such a young lady.  I enjoyed your poem, even though it was deep and dark.  My recommendation is to find a really good therapist and psychiatrist in order to be properly evaluated in order to get a proper diagnosis.  Best of luck to you.  

[AddictivePersonality212]

lol
and we have a smart one.

[DLA]

Well, if any of what you've written is true, especially in your bio, then you need the meds.  But going on the fact that you use "theatrics" to get what you want, I don't know whether to trust your post or not.