That's good. It seems like pdoc visit is in order. Keep us posted.
Thanks people. Talked to parents (kind of). Gonna wait it out, at least for now. Been loaded up with sleep drugs now so tonight will defo not be a problem
I saw your old posts, you were stable on meds last August. You were questioning if you should share your suicidal ideation last September. Now is the time to tell your secrets if you haven't. You need a med adjustment is all and to let go of all the secrets that bind you. I noticed you are not online, but I am watching for you. Please talk to your parents, throw a fit if you have to, but please don't reach out and not accept our encouragement. I know your pain, my first episode was at 14, at least the first severe one I remember. I lived to be 42 and am happy to be alive. Talk to us at least.
If it's that bad, call 911 or have your parents bring you to an ER, preferably a psychiatric ER. Even if things don't go great with your parents, you'll still be alive to experience it. Do your parents know you've attempted before? I guarantee you that they still care and still want you around.
You need psychiatric treatment, that much is clear. You probably need medication. It might take a while, but the right meds can literally change your life in an enormously positive way. Just hang in there.
I agree with Weaver! Don't do anything drastic... Just give it a little bit and you will snap out of it. You really should tell your parents how you are feeling so you can get help.
I say wait it out. Are you getting any treatment for BP? If you don't like the BP mood your in, just wait, it will change.