Im sick in the head

[cheeklollipop]

Well im sat here with a spliff i just gave in i had to have one and ive finally thought about it and i do believe im sick in the head.
Sometime i wish i was evil when i was a child i liked to hit people and cause they emtional pain play with the minds of people that love me and i use to love it.  Iam clingy with all boyfriends
I got this sick liking to mase murder serial killer books and i love reading about what happened to the victims i dont get off on it i find it interesting to what is going on in thier heads
Sometimes i have thoughts about beating people up and imagine what i would do it them in my head
Sometime i wish people would just leave me alone and i wamt it to be completely silent
I feel at my love for people comes and goes one minute i love them then i couldnt care if they died
I have no sex drive unless i see a stranger i like then i just want meaningless sex and then walk away
im no scared that as i havent told my doc this
to scared to tell her

[Crystlas]

We have tried and tried to help you, but YOU WILL NOT LISTEN.  I made a decision that when I have a private practice I will kick out clients that do not learn and move forward from their issues.  Why do you keep coming in here for advice and then do not heed it?  I am not trying to sound mean, but if you were one of my clients I would boot you out the door.  Call it tough love, darling.  WAKE UP.... YOU ARE BIPOLAR,,, so take responsibility and deal with it and love you for what you are, not who you could be.  Get off the drugs too!!  I told you how I felt about that quite clearly.  No excuses, marijuana is not physically addictive.  THC causes depression used the way you use it.  I know, I experienced it.  I hate to sound harsh, but it sounds to me like you are here for attention not help.  If you were here for help, you would have taken some of our adivce by now.  I do hope this wakes your tail up a bit.  Oh, clinginess is a symptom of Co-dependency, not BP, I know, I am a recovering co-dependent too!  Take care.  

[triedeverymed]

Don't be afraid to tell the doctor, they have heard much worse. You need to be honest so you can get a proper dianosis and then medication. It will be alright, just be honest like you are being here. If you can't tell her, take a written copy of your feeling and send it to her a couple days before your next appointment.
You sound like you really want help with this and you deserve to feel good.
Best of Luck

[DLA]

If you don't tell your dr the entire truth about what is going on with you how can she really help you?  You have to be completely honest with her about all the feelings you have, the pot, all of it!

You want to be better, I know you do.  I read your posts and I've really listened to you.  So wanting to be better and kick the pot it doesn't make sense that you don't tell her.  She is not out to judge you, just help you.  Do it for yourself just b/c you deserve to feel better and not be going thru this he// all the time.