Is this Bi-Polar?

[alebensb]

I am asking for help!  I am in a situation  that has cycled for three years now.  Though I might have some issue, which I am not claiming I don’t.  This situation is about my girlfriend

I have been with my girlfriend for over three years and there has been a consistent cycle  that occurs.  She gets completely tired, and everything she says seems to be negative.  I am an optimist and try to pump her up, but that does not work.  She also has a commitment problem, being that there was a rough up bringing.  So she gets into this stage where she tries to prove to herself she is not co-dependant.  She will go out and get drunk till she blacks out.  She tells me she doesn’t remember what happened.  She then will turn it around on me saying. Well I am confused and I don’t think we are supposed to be together.  Though 12 hours before she is completely in-love with me and her actions and words prove it.  It seems to be a complete mood swing.

I understand that anger and love are close in relationship both giving off pleasurable  endorphins.  It would seem that she copes with her situation by string up the pot I call  it. My example is I leave for thanksgiving and she goes out gets so drunk she says she doesn’t remember anything.  She then processed to say she needs space.  That she feels that our love is not meant to be.  She doesn’t really care that it ruins my thanksgiving.  In fact I think that gives her pleasure subconsciously.  She brings in this drama and it helps her feel better.  She will even confide with another guy because she doesn’t want to be co-dependant to me.

Why I think this is a mental problem is it is a cycle.  She is not stable, she is not happy,  she is to stressed out with work, her MBA, and because she has said to me multiple times I don’t understand why I am this way.  I want to love you, but I can’t.  But, she says I don’t understand.

She seems unhappy, but everyone that is close to her loves her and gives her 100%.  In my mind most girls would be so excited and because they are having a  Biltmore Christmas, and an amazing new years. Though she seems to fight the good in her life to try and prove she is so independent.  

I say to myself why do I stay in this relationship and it is because I love this girl and I am committed to her.  I know she has something wrong with her and I feel bad just walking away because 70% of the time she is amazing it is this 30% I hate.  

What do you think her problem might be?  How do I help her?  Please do not answer  just walk away.  If I could I would.    

Thanks for your time,

Andrew

[Venora Moonwind]

Mandy is right. get her hormones and her thyroid checked out to rule out physical reasons for her behavior.  then after this see a psychiatrist to get her evaluated.Maybe all she needs is therapy to work out why she is feeling this way. but she has to want to get help. and even though you love this girl you have to think of what is best for you. you tell her you love her and you will stand by her but she needs to get help fo you to be together and you will support in her decision to get help.
I know this isnt easy but loveing someone isnt always easy. Just ask my husband who  has been thorugh all my bi polarness.  but he laid down the law to me I get help or he was outta ther and it woke me up, I got the help I needed.
you and your girl friend are in my prayers. Let me know how things work out.
Love Venora

[Mandy0079]

Hi Andrew...  I am not a doctor, but I would venture to say that I don't think your gf is bipolar.  I have studied up on BP and have several BP people in my life.  

Honestly, to me she just sounds young and slightly immature.  (not trying to be rude about someone you care so deeply for) Though there are other things out there that could be causing her to act the way she does.  Hormones would be the first thing she should have checked out.  

Good Luck to you!