Aa
Ever since this I've been stuck...
I wish I could make this brief but I can't so here it goes...
Ever since I had this religious episode in January 2011 I've been stuck.
Basically for a few days I went into a trance (on and off), wrote a religious website proclaiming all kinds of stuff including that I'm Jesus reborn, the judgements for the continents, the 7 seals and that people should stop following their dreams. I had no idea why I was doing this I just had this sense of urgency that I needed to do it. Then after a few days when I was nearly done a friend told me "today is MLK day" and a light bulb lit up in my head thinking this is the day I need to release the website. The reason I thought this is 'cause the intro page of the website was all about stop following mans' dreams and get with Gods' vision of what he wants for us. So I finished it and started posting it online through twitter/facebook though on new accounts.
The next day I was unable to update the website and started posting all kinds of stuff all over my real facebook page including the link to the website. It was all religious stuff and it came in constant flow. A lot of my friends thought I was reading directly from a bible and/or some other religious text which I was not and I am neither knowledgeable of these things. Eventually as I was doing this I had a sense that "people" were coming for me so I had to leave my house. I started typing faster than what my brain could handle and I started to sound like a computer.
So, I felt drawn to a park that was miles away and I started walking there. During my walk I saw people committing sins which I would call out to them and tell them it was a sin and/or they'd go to hell. Eventually I got to the park, walked around it maybe 4 times until I felt drawn to walk through the middle of it. I was extremely thirsty and was guided off my path to a cup of water sitting in the middle of nowhere. I went back on my path until I saw a fence (a good third of the park is a gated golf course) I thought "God will guide me" and sure enough I went along the fence maybe 40 feet and found a spot where the barbed wire was drawn down lower. I used my peacoat to get over the actual barbs though. As I walked through here I came across a hill with 3 trees which I felt was a "sign" of the 3 crosses.
After a quick rest I continued on and soon enough the fence was in the distance. I thought again "God will guide me" and I headed in a certain direction of the fence and found a hole in it. After that I was drawn to my ex-wives grandparents 'cause I felt I would be safe there because they were devout Christians. I got to their house and nobody was there. I laid down under a bench to sleep until sometime later I was drawn to the neighbors house across the way 'cause their front porch light was on. As I stood there ringing their bell a patrol car zoomed down the street, turned around and left. (I had this sense they were looking for me) I laughed then returned to the other house across the street and slept in their backyard. It got cold so I checked their windows though none were open so I continued to sleep on the floor. I woke up in the morning to the gardeners in the backyard. After they left I stayed for a bit. Soon I sensed that I needed to get in the backyard of the neighbors. I soon sensed 3 people were coming to get me and I prayed to God regarding each one to stop their actions. I went on the roof of this house, once again I was draw there, and sat there for a while. Eventually I was standing there and a family went into their backyard next to the grandparents house. I freaked out and nearly climbed down a tree trunk which nearly broke but I thought "Leap of faith" and just then 2 volunteer cops showed up in the ex-wives grandparents backyard so I stood on the roof. I glanced back and forth between the family and the cops. Seeing the family brought a sense of calmness to me so I just stood there watching the cops no more than 15 feet from where I was.
After that I went down from the roof to the backyard and prayed more. Eventually I felt it was safe and left the house to return to the park. I went back to the same section of fencing yet the hole that was there last night was gone so I used my peacoat to get over the barbed wire. Soon after being in there for a little while a worker came up to me on a cart. He asked me multiple times that I needed to leave. I told him he shouldn't be driving that because it was not part of Gods' vision. I told him I was searching for my three trees. The more I walked and looked for them I started to become confused and not sure of things. I walked up to a tree, put my head to it and prayed for a second then immediately turned and walked in a direction. Incidently there was a pond 40-50 feet away. I didn't go around the pond but rather jumped in and swam across. When I got to the other side I couldn't get out 'cause my coat soaked up shitloads of water. I threw off my coat, took off all my clothes and climbed out. After I got out I had a very new sense of being like I was just born or something. I crawled in the original direction I was going though 30 feet from the pond was a cement path and I couldn't get myself to cross it at all. It was like a strange barrier.
Just then cops came and guess what... there were 3 of them. I don't recall much of my conversation with them but this. I told them it was my land though I didn't recognize it with all the cement, ponds and other strange things. One of them kept joking and laughing about what I was doing. I looked up at him and said over and over (for a little while until they walked away) you will continue to laugh and laugh and it will become uncontrollable! You will laugh and laugh and laugh! Strangely enough his grin grew humongous and his laughing wouldn't stop for quite a while... so they walked away behind me and he was still laughing his butt off. A few minutes goes by when one of them says, "Code 4? Why is this a code 4? What's going on?" and he said something on the radio that we were in the 18th hole which totally set me off. I said, "The 18th? hahahah! That's 666! No wonder I couldn't leave this area!" Soon after a sheriff pulls up and when he jumped out I had a sense that this was one of the people come to get me and I greeted him like I knew him forever. So the sheriff took me to the hospital where they kept me for a while until I calmed down. In the hospital they obviously tested me for drugs which I was not on. That night I was in the psychiatric intake ward and the next day I was in the actual ward.
My first day in the ward someone approached me and said, "You're him aren't you?" by this time I was calm, no longer "sensing" things or flipping out whatever you want to call it. He kept claiming I was "him" and said he was the first witness...?? wtf.. The entire time he was in the ward he kept talking about religious stuff and how I was him and stuff.
There was another time at night when I was in the common room reading and another person came to me and started asking me questions. I put my hand over my left eye, went into a trance again and started answering his questions. I don't recall all of them but some were along the lines of "You're really him?" "We've been waiting for you for a long time." "When are the others coming?" "What are we going to do?" etc... The questions stopped when, I believe, the person behind me motioned for him to stop asking questions. This person being a guy who I thought was the leader of the group watching over me in the ward...
To be quite honest after being in the ward and looking back it felt like a charade put up to make me believe that I'm crazy yet still guide me to believe I'm him??
When I was released it was on my records stating I was bipolar. I already had an idea I may be bipolar (for a long time I thought it was adhd though)
(my questions etc. below...)
Ever since I had this religious episode in January 2011 I've been stuck.
Basically for a few days I went into a trance (on and off), wrote a religious website proclaiming all kinds of stuff including that I'm Jesus reborn, the judgements for the continents, the 7 seals and that people should stop following their dreams. I had no idea why I was doing this I just had this sense of urgency that I needed to do it. Then after a few days when I was nearly done a friend told me "today is MLK day" and a light bulb lit up in my head thinking this is the day I need to release the website. The reason I thought this is 'cause the intro page of the website was all about stop following mans' dreams and get with Gods' vision of what he wants for us. So I finished it and started posting it online through twitter/facebook though on new accounts.
The next day I was unable to update the website and started posting all kinds of stuff all over my real facebook page including the link to the website. It was all religious stuff and it came in constant flow. A lot of my friends thought I was reading directly from a bible and/or some other religious text which I was not and I am neither knowledgeable of these things. Eventually as I was doing this I had a sense that "people" were coming for me so I had to leave my house. I started typing faster than what my brain could handle and I started to sound like a computer.
So, I felt drawn to a park that was miles away and I started walking there. During my walk I saw people committing sins which I would call out to them and tell them it was a sin and/or they'd go to hell. Eventually I got to the park, walked around it maybe 4 times until I felt drawn to walk through the middle of it. I was extremely thirsty and was guided off my path to a cup of water sitting in the middle of nowhere. I went back on my path until I saw a fence (a good third of the park is a gated golf course) I thought "God will guide me" and sure enough I went along the fence maybe 40 feet and found a spot where the barbed wire was drawn down lower. I used my peacoat to get over the actual barbs though. As I walked through here I came across a hill with 3 trees which I felt was a "sign" of the 3 crosses.
After a quick rest I continued on and soon enough the fence was in the distance. I thought again "God will guide me" and I headed in a certain direction of the fence and found a hole in it. After that I was drawn to my ex-wives grandparents 'cause I felt I would be safe there because they were devout Christians. I got to their house and nobody was there. I laid down under a bench to sleep until sometime later I was drawn to the neighbors house across the way 'cause their front porch light was on. As I stood there ringing their bell a patrol car zoomed down the street, turned around and left. (I had this sense they were looking for me) I laughed then returned to the other house across the street and slept in their backyard. It got cold so I checked their windows though none were open so I continued to sleep on the floor. I woke up in the morning to the gardeners in the backyard. After they left I stayed for a bit. Soon I sensed that I needed to get in the backyard of the neighbors. I soon sensed 3 people were coming to get me and I prayed to God regarding each one to stop their actions. I went on the roof of this house, once again I was draw there, and sat there for a while. Eventually I was standing there and a family went into their backyard next to the grandparents house. I freaked out and nearly climbed down a tree trunk which nearly broke but I thought "Leap of faith" and just then 2 volunteer cops showed up in the ex-wives grandparents backyard so I stood on the roof. I glanced back and forth between the family and the cops. Seeing the family brought a sense of calmness to me so I just stood there watching the cops no more than 15 feet from where I was.
After that I went down from the roof to the backyard and prayed more. Eventually I felt it was safe and left the house to return to the park. I went back to the same section of fencing yet the hole that was there last night was gone so I used my peacoat to get over the barbed wire. Soon after being in there for a little while a worker came up to me on a cart. He asked me multiple times that I needed to leave. I told him he shouldn't be driving that because it was not part of Gods' vision. I told him I was searching for my three trees. The more I walked and looked for them I started to become confused and not sure of things. I walked up to a tree, put my head to it and prayed for a second then immediately turned and walked in a direction. Incidently there was a pond 40-50 feet away. I didn't go around the pond but rather jumped in and swam across. When I got to the other side I couldn't get out 'cause my coat soaked up shitloads of water. I threw off my coat, took off all my clothes and climbed out. After I got out I had a very new sense of being like I was just born or something. I crawled in the original direction I was going though 30 feet from the pond was a cement path and I couldn't get myself to cross it at all. It was like a strange barrier.
Just then cops came and guess what... there were 3 of them. I don't recall much of my conversation with them but this. I told them it was my land though I didn't recognize it with all the cement, ponds and other strange things. One of them kept joking and laughing about what I was doing. I looked up at him and said over and over (for a little while until they walked away) you will continue to laugh and laugh and it will become uncontrollable! You will laugh and laugh and laugh! Strangely enough his grin grew humongous and his laughing wouldn't stop for quite a while... so they walked away behind me and he was still laughing his butt off. A few minutes goes by when one of them says, "Code 4? Why is this a code 4? What's going on?" and he said something on the radio that we were in the 18th hole which totally set me off. I said, "The 18th? hahahah! That's 666! No wonder I couldn't leave this area!" Soon after a sheriff pulls up and when he jumped out I had a sense that this was one of the people come to get me and I greeted him like I knew him forever. So the sheriff took me to the hospital where they kept me for a while until I calmed down. In the hospital they obviously tested me for drugs which I was not on. That night I was in the psychiatric intake ward and the next day I was in the actual ward.
My first day in the ward someone approached me and said, "You're him aren't you?" by this time I was calm, no longer "sensing" things or flipping out whatever you want to call it. He kept claiming I was "him" and said he was the first witness...?? wtf.. The entire time he was in the ward he kept talking about religious stuff and how I was him and stuff.
There was another time at night when I was in the common room reading and another person came to me and started asking me questions. I put my hand over my left eye, went into a trance again and started answering his questions. I don't recall all of them but some were along the lines of "You're really him?" "We've been waiting for you for a long time." "When are the others coming?" "What are we going to do?" etc... The questions stopped when, I believe, the person behind me motioned for him to stop asking questions. This person being a guy who I thought was the leader of the group watching over me in the ward...
To be quite honest after being in the ward and looking back it felt like a charade put up to make me believe that I'm crazy yet still guide me to believe I'm him??
When I was released it was on my records stating I was bipolar. I already had an idea I may be bipolar (for a long time I thought it was adhd though)
(my questions etc. below...)
Check out this book: Alternative Realities by Leonard George. I am going to send you a message.
First off. I don't believe I'm Jesus or any reincarnation of Jesus nor the anti-christ.
What leaves me confounded is how did I know things I shouldn't have known? How was I guided to certain places and or things? Like finding the cup of water or the places in the fences or knowing to leave the backyard 'cause cops were coming? Why did I have such a huge religious experience? Why did people in the ward start refering to me as him and hinting that I was Jesus even though none of them knew anything about how I got in there?
so... I feel extremely confounded by what happened to me. I feel disillusioned in life. Luckily for me I'm on disability ever since this event 'cause I can't seem to get my head straight on what happened to me.
My neighbors claim their grandmother was bipolar and had religious episodes as well. My other friend said his uncle used to say the exact same **** I was saying... Is this common with bipolar?? Have any of you had experiences where you knew things you shouldn't?
If you're curious here's the website I created...
http://www.wix.com/bringerofchrist/thetruechristopher
What leaves me confounded is how did I know things I shouldn't have known? How was I guided to certain places and or things? Like finding the cup of water or the places in the fences or knowing to leave the backyard 'cause cops were coming? Why did I have such a huge religious experience? Why did people in the ward start refering to me as him and hinting that I was Jesus even though none of them knew anything about how I got in there?
so... I feel extremely confounded by what happened to me. I feel disillusioned in life. Luckily for me I'm on disability ever since this event 'cause I can't seem to get my head straight on what happened to me.
My neighbors claim their grandmother was bipolar and had religious episodes as well. My other friend said his uncle used to say the exact same **** I was saying... Is this common with bipolar?? Have any of you had experiences where you knew things you shouldn't?
If you're curious here's the website I created...
http://www.wix.com/bringerofchrist/thetruechristopher
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