dont even know anymore

[SamAE]

I initially joined this forum because my mom began to wonder about me being bipolar, at the time i was taking lexapro, & we started to think maybe it was just that medicine that made me crazy, which is basically true. i think it made me manic. i got off it, went back on 100 mgs of zoloft then saw a psych for a little while. i ended up stopping with that, cuz he was annoying me. he didnt seem to know what he was doing, he didnt seem to listen to what i was really saying. & these arent just assumptions ive made, my mom was in during most my sessions & she said all that herself

the one thing he seemed to figure out was that i could be ADD, cuz everyone who knows me knows i have a horrible attention span...i figit all the time. sometimes i carry hair clips with me just so i can click em back & forth, i click the mouse on the computer constantly. i havent been able to finish a book in so long cuz i end up getting bored or sleepy.

the point of this post is, recently my mom sat me down & told me she was worried about me cuz ive been "talking excessively" to where i dont even know im doing it & that i just go on & on & on & dont stop.
i was a constant pot smoker since i was 15 up until a couple months ago so i think thats probably whats made me more....alive i guess ill say. she wants me to schedule an appointment with my dr about it & she is VERY convinced im bi polar. like my sister said, when im happy...im happy beyond belief..& when im upset..if anyone tries to talk to me ill bite their head off

i already am having to take vitamins everyday to stay alive (if i dont im tired all day, im not anemic but my blood work showed that continuing taking em would be a good idea) & singuliar for my allergies....my bcp so that i can keep my time of the month in order...& my zoloft...& i usally always have to take aleve for my knees....or advil for a headache...or benadryl at night to go to sleep...i dont wanna add more pills to take. if i could find something to help with....ADD, bipolar & my anxiety. id be happy as ever.

ive been told that its a possibility that my anxiety is as a result of my "untreated" ADD

also my moms been making me feel like if i keep this "excessive talking" up that eventually people are just gonna ignore me & pass me by. which has been getting me...as you can tell by this long post...i have lots to say.

[RichReligion]

Yep..The Shrink diagnose me with BP, due to those same symptoms...I talk to damn much..my mind is always working. I think negative, mostly, and am now losing all of my relationships. I learned alot and now I just want to teach it. Im a great chess player due to the fact that im able to go indept with thought..I think too much and now im a chess pro...lol..go figure..'

I only read what I right; aint got the patience and i'll fall to sleep after reading 4lines or so. Im mostly worried about how life is gonna work out for me..I've been through way too much as a youth..I grew up way to fast. I try so hard but only get so far...lol...like Lincon Park..I jus feel like giving up sometime...I'll focus on negative and abandon anything postive.

They used to call me retarded back in the day..lol..coulda been add, but never checked on it.  Continue with theropy; your getting tired, and anything could happen to you mentally at this point; you're like a sponge wating to obsorb what ever is spilled your way..becareful what you put yourself around cuz once you soak it up it could be hard to rinse out. anxious...add just means that your tallent and attention is gathered all in one area, and if that's so, focus on that area and stop worrying aboout what everyone has to say.

and remember that you cant beat up the whole world so check yourself before you get pissed at everyone who don't understand you.

Idle time is your ememy..so stay buisy.

[SamAE]

ive made an appointment with my doctor specifically for this, so im probably gonna see about another psych. especially since when i was going to the last one i wasnt driving which is why i had to rely on my mom & when she was available. now that im able to take myself, having my mom in the room wont be a probably. my last one just kept pushin the thought that my problem was being molested or raped in the past, but i told him numerously never.

[Minty737]

Sounds complicated. Dont listen to everything your mother says, they're not always right. People are nto goign to ignore you jsut cos you talk a lot! They may become tired of it, but if you do find some meds that help, then they will less wary of you as you dont talk their ear off anymore. While it does sound like you are taking a lot of meds, perhaps if you find the right diagnosis, you can be taken off a few in exchange for one which does the right job and fixes multiple problems.

Talk to a good doctor, and like hell1971 said, if you didnt like the last one, get a different one. It is important that they listen to you, and try to find a correct diagnosis. Possibly either you or the doctor is put off by your mum accompanying you into the room, maybe she could jsut drive you there and not always join inside? Keep up the mood tracker on this site, it would be really helpful to a doctor.
~Minty~

[hell1971]

You should go and get your diagnosis checked , if you didnt like the last doc find another one. keep notes on your behaviour until you get the appointment. Good Luck