I've had a few similar situations which occurred while I was pregnant and a few years following. I had a mole suddenly appear which I thought had all the classic symptoms of melanoma. The dermatologist had it biopsied and it came back Mild dysplasia (which is benign). A few months before that I had a mole that I had for a while start to change. It got darker areas and the colors varied. That too came back as dysplastic (atypical). In all, I had 3 different changing or strange moles that came back dysplastic within 2 years of the birth of my last child. In the past 10 years, I have had no problems. I wonder if it has something to do with hormones?? Anyway, I understand your worry and I was crazy about these. It is good that the doctor is going to remove this mole and chances are great that it will come back benign.
I understand what you are going through, I don't have the same problem but what I know that in most cases the result is negative. Doctors just need to rule out the possibility of it being cancer. They usually want to check it if it looks even a little bit suspicious. So don't worry too much about it.