cgd - my son, like yours, doesn't need a lot of sleep. My son is 18 now, and he needs less sleep than anyone I've ever known, except his great grandfather, who needed only 4 hours of sleep a night.
Spanking him for not needing sleep is probably not a good idea. It actually seems cruel.
What was that one small sentence "He won't hardly eat"? It seems like if you have a child who doesn't need a lot of sleep and isn't eating, maybe the eating part might be the thing to focus on?
Your son reminds me of our granddaughter when she was that age. She was not able to sleep, did not eat very much, did not want to be alone and would do everything in her power not to be alone. She appeared hyperactive and in constant motion. She also had major "potty" issues to the extent of severe constipation. At six years of age, she was diagnosed with a severe anxiety disorder. Once on medication, the symptoms gradually subsided, but it took about six years to become what I would call "normal".
I agree with RR, your son may just not need that much sleep. Give him quiet activities to do and let him follow his natural sleepiness.
How is his behavior in general, does he appear to be unusually active, nervous/anxious or insecure? If you believe he displays any of these concerns, please set an appointment with his pediatrician/family doctor to gain some perspective.
Otherwise, establish a bedtime routine i.e. a bath, story time, brushing teeth and off to bed. He needs to physically stay in his bed, however he doesn't need to go to sleep right away. Tell him that if he gets out of his bed he will receive a consequence of time out, 1minute in a boring place i.e. bathroom or utility room for every year old he is, 3 years old, 3 minutes. Be consistent with the time-out when he gets out of his bed. Your consistency will pay off.
My newly 5 year old son, goes to bed and frequently, sits up in bed playing with stuffed animals for up to 20 minutes before going to sleep. We have caught him a few times, out of bed looking out his window for airplanes in the sky as well. This behavior by itself isn't unusual. Best wishes...
Wow, and I thought I was the only one to have gone thru this! My daughter is 3.5 as well, very smart, very strong willed, never naps (no matter how tired out you could get her) unless it's on her terms...our bed time routines were always 3 hours of battles or us resigning to watch tv and them )her brother won't be left out) fall asleep on the couch. One thing I realized is that all the negative really doesn't work well for my kid. Seeing as my daughter loves to stay up and watch tv with mom and dad, I have made her earn a movie night.
We bought her a "special" nightlight which battery operated, so she can turn it on. We read our couple of short bedtime stories, they each pick one and one is a standard. Then I allow them to listen to soft music or a story on cd, since the story isn't usually enough to send my kids to dreamland. In the morning, if she falls asleep in her bed without fight, she puts a sticker on a chart made just for "movie night." If she earns one everyday, we go to the library on Friday and she gets to pick a movie. We then stay up, have snacks and enjoy the movie as a family. It's less of a fight, once it's in place....I'm not saying the battle never comes back, but it's a positive alternative, and it's fun family bonding too.
Hope this helps!! Good luck!!
We should never underestimate the power praise and rewards as a way to shape and modify a child's behavior. Kids need consequences both positve and negative to learn to behave appropriately. Positive consequences and rewards for postive behavior and negative consequences for negative behavior.