6 year old doesn't want to poop

[natesmom616]

I hope that I'm in the correct forum for this.  I have a 6 year old (7) in June of this year who does not like to poop.  He was potty trained fairly quickly when younger and had no real problems.  A few years ago, I noticed that he would go for days without having a bowel movement.  When I'd ask him about it, he'd tell me that he didn't have to go, though it was obvious that he did and was holding it in. If he was standing, he'd run to a chair or the floor and sit down and rock or shake his legs or something.  I took him to his pediatrician who thought that possibly he'd had a very large bowel movement at one time and it caused some pain. (He is rather small. At almost 7 yrs of age, he is in a size 4)He believed maybe this made my son apprehensive about going for fear of the pain.  He put him on a bulk stool softener.  This did help him go more often, but only because he can only "hold it" for so long.  For a little while it got better.  He hasn't been on the softener for over a year and half.  However, this is still a problem.  I can tell when he has to go, though he will deny it every time.  I've tried everything from trying to explain how it can hurt his body to hold it in, not allowing him to go places if he hasn't gone and I know he has to go, and even rewards for going. On the rare occasion that he does go without holding it, I'm always quick to tell him how proud I am that he isn't holding it in.  Every time he goes, I ask him if it causes him pain and he says no.  He says that he doesn't like the way it feels.  I've explained that he will have to poop for the rest of his life, regardless of if he doesn't like the feel of it.  He's never constipated and his stools always seem soft, though formed.
Then, last week, he said that when he goes, it hurts his stomach.  At first I thought maybe this was his stomach cramping up when he has a bowel movement.  But I asked him to show me where it hurt and he pointed to his lower abdomen and then also pointed up higher in the center of his torso.  
Is this most likely a psychological issue?  Or can it be medical.  It's not that he doesn't HAVE to go.  By his behavior, I would guess that he would have a bowel movement every other day at the very least.  The urge to go is there, he just holds it and holds it and holds it.  If I wasn't watching, he'd hold it for up to 5 or 6 days.  Could this be a medical issue?   Should I take him to a specialists?  I'm at a loss as to what to do.  Any suggestions or comments are appreciated.  

[geegee117]

My heart goes out to you.  I have a 28 year old son and when he was about 7-8yrs. he had the same problem.  We would have to take him to ER every so often (at the time we didn't know what was wrong).  He would just scream and wriggle in pain.  He would say mom please help me.  It would break my heart.  No one knew what it was.  He was missing school to the point his teacher sent work home so he could keep up.  I would not leave the ER one night until someone helped us. They finally gave us the name of a pediatric gastro. dr. We stayed in the ER until morning (which wasn't long).  When the office opened I went to the Dr. office and told then, I would sit there until they saw us.  After a wait we got in.  Of course all the normal tests then scheduled a colonostopy and light down throat at children's hospital.  This was hard to make him go through but not as hard as the pain he was having.  They gave me a color picture that showed the beginning of an ulcer.  Michael was given a pill to take when he felt the pain and it would relax everything.  We also changed his diet somewhat ( x fried most).  It was by far the worst thing I have ever experienced.  All this to say please take him to a pediatric gastro doctor.  It was the best thing I ever did.  This may not be Nate's problem but the doctor will get to the bottom of what the problem is.  Good luck!!  Michael still has some problems but has learned how to control it himself.  Nate's problem is not uncommon for a gastro dr.  They see this a good bit. I would love to hear how things go:)

[mrsphips]

even though it is a little relieving to know im not alone..i wouldnt wish this on anyone and really feel for others going through this. my 3 1/2 yr old has been peeing on the potty for sometime now but wont poop in it except on a VERY rare occassion. i have done alot of reading and even taken her to the doctor. she is not constipated..if she was she wouldnt take large poops in her underwear.  The doctors obviously have no answers, i feel this is more of a behavioral problem even though the experts dont seem to agree that a child so young could put thought into this. In the last couple of days she has also started wetting her pants..she has never done this since potty trained almost a year ago..she even gets up in the middle of the night to pee and doesnt go in the bed. I am now fearful to take her anywhere, i took her to the park and she wet and soiled herself, there was a bathroom there. i want to do fun things with her but this is getting so frustrating and its hard not to get upset. we have tried everything..positive reinforcement, changing her diet, yelling, crying, reading her books on the potty. Nothings working and i am so scared of what it will be like when she goes to school. I typically have to change her 3-8 times a day and she refuses to wear a pullup. This is straining on my relationship with her because when she has to go and she is holding it she becomes a different kid..and throws violent fits it is very stressful on our whole family. There is no cure for this and i just wonder when and if it will ever end

[xdunlapx]

As a young child I suffered with severe constipation and very painful poops. As far back as I can remember I've always held my poop in (even to this day at 26 years old). I am so aversed to pooping I only go every few days. I hold it in until I simply cannot hold it in any longer and run to the bathroom.

When I was a child it was the pain that I was avoiding. Now, today, it's the grossness of pooping that keeps me from going regularly. I think it's just some kind of OCD thing. Not sure really.

[xdunlapx]

As a young child I suffered with severe constipation and very painful poops. As far back as I can remember I've always held my poop in (even to this day at 26 years old). I am so aversed to pooping I only go every few days. I hold it in until I simply cannot hold it in any longer and run to the bathroom.

When I was a child it was the pain that I was avoiding. Now, today, it's the grossness of pooping that keeps me from going regularly. I think it's just some kind of OCD thing. Not sure really.

[Alannasmommy01]

I just wanted to say I am currently dealing with this with my 5 yr old daughter. She was actually in the hospital last week b/c she was constipated and would not eat or drink, therefore leaving her dehydrated. The hospital gave her an enema and and IV of fluids, kept her overnight. The thing that gets me if, she was sent to the ER on a Thursday. It was the Monday before that that she stopped eating, but she pooped for me on Saturday twice and Sunday once, then on Monday stopped eating, Wed. stopped drinking. I followed up with a visit to my ped in 48 hours who said keep giving miralax.  Here we are, one week later, 1 capful of miralax a day, 3 suppositories and 1 enema and still no poop! She was holding it up until the suppositories, but after I gave them she is trying, just that watery poop is coming out. We have been dealing with this for 2-3 years, saw a GI Dr last summer and I was just told to make an appointment with another 1. I just want her to poop, its so sad! She was tested for Celiac's and that was negative, and will be tested for Cystic Fibrosis next week. I just don't know what to do, calling the ped when the sun comes up.

[fdak]

I have a 6 yr old daughter with HFA. She does very well except with pooping in the potty. I have had medical tests conducted all which are negative. My daughter is very sweet except when it comes to the potty then she becomes quite aggressive and physically violent. Screaming, pulling hair, throwing things and biting. Although we have somewhat overcome this she will hold in her stool for up to a week. Her tummy becomes distended and she complains of tummy pain. She says it hurts when she goes but she will go in her underwear with no problems. Dr's recommend miralax which only semi works. she will continue to hold in but now little bits of poop will be in her underwear and this happens several times a day. I am so tired of washing out underwear. She now washes it herself first but then I have to launder it. She has been so out of control with this she has scared my 3 yr old daughter who now also refuses to use the potty. I am at my wits end. I even have a team of specialist working with her but she still wont stop holding in. I read some of these posts and I fear this is something she will be dealing with for a long time. I really hope she can overcome this before beginning 1st grade. Her unwillingness to go has caused her behavior to become more defiant. She is now becoming more somatic with tummy and headaches. She runs a fever of 102 or higher when she is overwhelmed or stressed. As soon as stressor is removed her temperature returns to normal and all pains disappear. I really want to help my daughter but I just don't know what to do anymore. I am more then frustrated and can't undestand why she would rather hold in her stool causing herself pain and discomfort instead of just going on the potty. thanks for reading and would appreciate any comments