Aa
5 year old daughter, major behavior probs
I see other posts about 5 year old behavior problems but mine is slightly different.
My daughter is 5, going to be 6 next month. She has been in daycare pretty much her whole life, except about a year and a half when I ran a daycare out of my home. She started school this year and is doing great. There have never been any reports from anyone about behavior problems at school or at daycare. When she is at either of her grandparents house, she is well behaved and her sweet self that I see every once in a while. My mother has recently said that she sees some of the things I describe, but not near to the extent that I deal with.
My daughter is a loving sweet girl. However, she has these temper problems that I and my husband are at the end of our rope with. She screams, throws things, cries for hours, hits her little brother, says she hates us, we are mean. The littlest thing will set off this tirade that literally frustrates me to the point of total exhaustion. I feel like I have to walk on eggshells with her because I never know when or what will set it off and once it starts, it doesn't stop until she goes to bed at night. When her dad picks her up from the babysitter after school, which is usually about 10 or 15 minutes after she gets off the bus, it starts immediately. She has had so many things taken away from her from TV to computer to not going places that she wants to. We have tried spanking, yelling, trying to reason with her, giving her so many chances that it almost seems comical at times.
My husband is in the Army Reserves and two weeks ago, I picked her up from the babysitters each day with bated breath waiting to see what kind of mood she would be in to see how our evening would go. Each day was the same, anger as soon as she saw me, and me on the defensive instantly.
Her 6 year check up is next month. My plan is to ask one of the nurses to take her out of the room while I talk to her Dr. about what has been going on. I don't know if she needs to see someone, be on medication or what. My husband is against any kind of meds, and honestly, I am too.
I feel like this is entirely my fault. I am a bad mom who has somehow caused this anger in my child. I love her more than life itself, but I am feeling like I don't like her anymore. I hate that I even think like that...I am desperate for some help. I want to help my baby feel better but I just don't know what to do.
If anyone has any suggestions for me...please let me know.
My daughter is 5, going to be 6 next month. She has been in daycare pretty much her whole life, except about a year and a half when I ran a daycare out of my home. She started school this year and is doing great. There have never been any reports from anyone about behavior problems at school or at daycare. When she is at either of her grandparents house, she is well behaved and her sweet self that I see every once in a while. My mother has recently said that she sees some of the things I describe, but not near to the extent that I deal with.
My daughter is a loving sweet girl. However, she has these temper problems that I and my husband are at the end of our rope with. She screams, throws things, cries for hours, hits her little brother, says she hates us, we are mean. The littlest thing will set off this tirade that literally frustrates me to the point of total exhaustion. I feel like I have to walk on eggshells with her because I never know when or what will set it off and once it starts, it doesn't stop until she goes to bed at night. When her dad picks her up from the babysitter after school, which is usually about 10 or 15 minutes after she gets off the bus, it starts immediately. She has had so many things taken away from her from TV to computer to not going places that she wants to. We have tried spanking, yelling, trying to reason with her, giving her so many chances that it almost seems comical at times.
My husband is in the Army Reserves and two weeks ago, I picked her up from the babysitters each day with bated breath waiting to see what kind of mood she would be in to see how our evening would go. Each day was the same, anger as soon as she saw me, and me on the defensive instantly.
Her 6 year check up is next month. My plan is to ask one of the nurses to take her out of the room while I talk to her Dr. about what has been going on. I don't know if she needs to see someone, be on medication or what. My husband is against any kind of meds, and honestly, I am too.
I feel like this is entirely my fault. I am a bad mom who has somehow caused this anger in my child. I love her more than life itself, but I am feeling like I don't like her anymore. I hate that I even think like that...I am desperate for some help. I want to help my baby feel better but I just don't know what to do.
If anyone has any suggestions for me...please let me know.
COMMUNITY LEADER
Thank you for sharing! Red food dye, sugar in combination with borderline hypoglycemia would certainly cause problems. Hope things are working out for you now.
My daughter started acting exactly like you described at about 3yrs old... After sometime of feeling like the worst mother in the world I found an article about food allergies and realized that this started when I began babysitting for a few kids... Apple juice was too expensive to give everyone so I bought koolade and cheaper snacks... Up until then I was very picky about what my daughter had to eat and drink...with some persistence and trying moments I narrowed her reactions down to red food dye, sugar and borderline hypoglycemia... Maybe this will help you... She was a beautiful, highly intelligent child that everyone loved being around... And unless they witnessed one of her tantrums couldn't believe what I was telling them...
you say you have given her so many chances that it seems comical at times. that suggests that you are not following through with threats consistantly. you list different discipline techniques you have tried. how long do you try them for?
Yes, we have Mommy/Sissy days (thats her nickname) at least a few times a week and we always do things as a family, like going to the bike trail, working out (she does a much toned down version of what her dad and I do). We set up obsitcal courses outside for her and her brother to do, we go to the mall, we read books together (she is learning to read and is doing awesome at it) and earlier today, we spent time in my bedroom doing our nails together.
Do you two get any quality one-on-one time together? If so, how often, and what kinds of things do you do together?
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