teacher problem or old fashioned parenting?

[redneckmom]

My son started kindergarden this year.  They get a colored card daily for their behavior.  Green is the best, followed by yellow for slight misbehavior and red for violence or extreme naughty behavior.  My son usually brings home green with sometimes yellow.  I was punishing him for the yellow cards until I figured out what he was being punished for.  He is getting in trouble for things that I feel are normal 5 year old behaviors.  He forgot where a stack of construction paper went so he got a yellow card.  He told a child directions when the child didn't hear the teacher properly.  There are no warnings for behavior problems in his class.  If a child he was playing with gets into trouble then all of them get into trouble (association????)    She also says that sometimes he doesn't finish his work on time.  She has lied about things as well.  (Lunch money not getting there on time) lost items.  However, if I bring up a question to her or ask her about things my son seems to be in trouble for the whole week.  I am very understanding of the demand on teachers and realize that my son is not perfect; however I really feel that he is getting the short end of the stick with this teacher.  The classroom is always very messy and disorganized.  He told me that he wants to switch schools.  I don't let him know my feelings for her and tell him just to do his best and even if he doesn't really agree with her rules just to ,listen anyhow.  But what if she really is a "bad" teacher?  This is her first year back at teaching after about 10 years off. How do I handle bringing up problems without her getting upset and taking it out on my son?

[RockRose]

It is hard to know what to do,  for sure.

Keep volunteering - that will earn you points at the school.  

Parenting is just hard.  I don't want to be ugly,  but just WAIT til you have a teenager!!!   Ow ow ow.

[redneckmom]

thanks.  thats kind of what I have been doing.  It is hard to know what to do.  I try to volounteer as much as I can but don't want to be overbearing to him at school.  Good grief I thought it would be easier when he started school.  HAH

[RockRose]

Sometimes you have to just suck it up if you have a bad teacher - and that's an important life lesson!  He's half way through the year and if he can stick it out,  it will be a learning lesson for him.    If he's being singled out and picked on,  that's a different thing,  but if by and large she's just kind of clueless,  I'd let it go.

My oldest had to "sign the book" one day - and he came home teary eyed,  saying he had to sign the book for talking in the restroom.  I kept saying you did NOT have to "sign the book" for talking in the boys bathroom,  what else happened.  Finally I had to email the teacher and say I want to support her classroom plan,  but I need to know the specifics of the misbehavior so I can reinforce it at home.  Sure enough,  he had talked in the boys bathroom.  

I just said honey,  suck it up.  She was weird,  did this to everyone,  just suck it up and get through it.  

Sheesh.  

Best wishes with the rest of the year.