Why does my child behave badly when it is time to leave

[Cin163]

My child always throws a fit when she has to leave.  We were at a school function (she's 5 and in kindergarten) and when it was time to go she was absolutely terrible, screaming, and not wanting to leave.  How do I change this behavior?

[babygirl6152]

excellent advice... the only other transitioning tips I know are singing a little song-

there is one other tip for kiddos- but it may be more trouble than it's worth..... a little vest or blanket some sort of visual or security item that tips them off to knowing it's time to change activities-  5 seems kind of old for that----

if it is behavioral ONLY I am sure you have your own way with dealing with lack of respect, because that is what the child could be doing......and tantrums at age 5 are not respectful of course. So I am curious- how did you respond?  You said she always does this/ you could use rewards for exiting nicely, you could use negative reinforcement... loss of privilege, timeouts, or good old fashioned swift spankings.

[jd1419]

Usuakky I can tell if there is going to be a problem when we leave somewhere with my boys--5 1/2 and 4--I started this ahile ago with them--I will give them time tables of when we are leaving--I will say okay guys 15 minutes--then 10 minutes or so and then 5--it gives them a clue of what is going on--I have not had the biys through a fit like that for quite some time...and they know if they do through a fit I will pick them up and carry them to the car kicking and screaming....so just don't give in and be firm with your child.

[tiredbuthappy]

well, there's 2 possibilities. you do not give enough info to give me insight into which case it may be, so you will have to look at your situation and decide.

1) she is spoiled and temeramental

or

2) she has difficulty transitioning.  children who have difficulty transitioning may have underlying anxiety problems as well. i found some sites, but didn't get to read through all of them. you may get ideas there.

http://www.helium.com/items/214671-strategies-for-helping-children-with-transition-challenges
http://www.ccbd.net/documents/bb/BB_V14N1_transitioning.pdf

[margypops]

Explain to her that she wont be able to go out and even to a school function if she yells when it is time to leave, ask her why she does it, and if she does it again you wont be able to take her out at all, be consistant and keep to it.