Am I over reacting? My 6 year old daughter was playing with a friends 10 year old boy.

[hbdad3]

Am I over reacting? I am a divorced dad with primary custody of my children.

Here is what happened.

While we were running errands my 6 year old daughter daughter said she did not want to be alone with a friend's (10 year old)son. I asked why and she proceeded to tell me that the 10 year old boy had been talking about private parts. I asked where the adults were and she said down stairs.

She said it made her feel uncomfortable. I asked her if she told her mom and she said no because she thought her mom would not believe her.

While I am certain this is all very innocent I was forced to explain to my daughter that she should have told an adult, the boys parents or her mom when this took place. I further had to explain that she should not ever be alone with any little boy.

I don't want her to believe the little boy is a bad kid. So I told her she needs to remember that he is a friend only and that anytime he says or does anything that makes her feel uncomfortable she needs to get an adult.

This little boy has had disciplinary problems in the past. He also has ADD.

Her is the response I received from the father of the boy.

Michael.
Just got a chance to respond. Here is the deal...
the kids were upstairs in the playroom with my daughterl (almost 15) and another teenager (16).  They were all playing air hockey and video games.  I was downstairs in the living room talking. I heard everything going on upstairs. Josh started to repeat a little sing-song he heard from a kid at school.  It was inappropriate (had "penis" in it). My daughter told him to stop, and he did. Later, privately, I reminded him about what's inappropriate. He felt bad when he realized that he was being inappropriate in front of your daughter since he thinks of her as the little sister he never had. That's it. No discussion of private parts. No show and tell. It lasted about 5-10 seconds tops and was over.

Here is my reply to the father,

Thank you for taking care of it.

I only wish someone had informed my wife that you had over heard this and that it had been dealt with.

When I told Veronica what Katie had said you gave indication that she knew that the incident had taken place.

She said she would talk to you  guys about it.

I would have much rather heard it from an adult then from my daughter. It troubles me that my daughter didn't feel comfortable telling her mom but instead told me and her older brothere.

I was not certain what to think. I spoke to the kids therapist and was told that this should not be taken lightly. That the two children are at two different stages of development and that they should be watched by adults not minors.

I talked to my daughter and told her that she should not be alone with any little boys. I told her that if anything ever makes her feel uncomfortable she should listen to that inner voice, walk away and get an adult.

As I said before I am sure everything was innocent

Needless to say the kids need to be monitored.

Thank you again for your attention to this matter.

My only concern is for the welfare of my daughter.


The father answered me back that its was a non event.

Should I be concerned? My ex wife thinks I am being too protective. Am I?

Your feed back would be greatly appreciated.

[margypops]

I agree with you and in my opinion one cant protect ones children enough, I mean in supervision, I have actually never thought that sleep overs are a good idea in younger children, and are fine once the child reaches an age of knowledge of these matters.So I would say that for your daughter more supervision.The many comments we get here are about young children and older children in rooms by themselves.,I have never understood how parents think thats okay .especially the little ones , even siblings need monitoring .good luck let it go now I hope the father has spoken strongly to his son .