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Paternity Question.

Hello I’m in but of a trouble, I’m waiting until my 6th week ultrasound for sure dates but I want an ease of mind. I slept with Man A March 31st And man B April 1st-9th.
Most ovulation calculators are dating that my ovulation was was the 6th.
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134578 tn?1614729226
COMMUNITY LEADER
When will your sixth week begin? It sounds like in about five days, if you think you ovulated on the 6th of April.

If your periods come every 28 days like clockwork, and have for years and never vary by as much as a day, and if your app said ovulation was on the 6th based on your last period beginning on the 23rd of March, the first guy could be just a bit too early to produce the pregnancy.

But if the lengths of your menstrual months vary, using the crown-to-rump measurement of the embryo to try to determine the conception date is a better way to go. If your periods aren't like clockwork, you don't want the doc or the ultrasound tech to use the first day of your last period as the start point for your pregnancy. Either ask them directly not to, (you can tell them that your cycles are too irregular to begin the count with that day) or you could even just say you don't remember when your last period began.
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11 Comments
Thank you for this.
My sixth week will start next week I got in for an ultrasound the 6th. My periods are unfortunately off. So I don’t know exactly when I ovulated I’m going by what the doctor told me so I assumed the 6th. But I did feel cramping that week. I’m just praying it isn’t man A.
When you go in, be sure to let the ultrasound tech and doctor know your cycles are irregular and ask them not to use the first day of your last period to begin the GA count. Ask them to base the GA count on the crown-to-rump measurement of the baby and its developmental markers as seen in the ultrasound, instead. For purposes of guessing at conception, the measurements of the actual baby always are more useful than the day your last period came. This is even more true if someone has irregular cycles, the date of their last period came isn't helpful. The 6th-week ultrasound measurements of the baby should give a pretty good idea.

Also be sure that they tell you the baby's estimated due date will be (your EDD), don't just let them pat you on the head and tell you a number of "weeks pregnant." Then when you go home you can put that date into a conception calculator (or just count back 266 days manually on a calendar), and it will give you an estimated conception date.
The ultrasound just showed as the due date is December 28 the baby measured 6 weeks and 1 day.
They told you today, May 6, that your due date is December 28 but that your GA is 6 weeks 1 day?  That makes your estimated conception date (computed from the due date) April 6, but (computed from the GA) April 7. It's a little surprising that the dates don't match, since probably both were calculated by the same computer (the one in the ultrasound machine). At least they were close.

You're trying to rule out the sex with Man A on March 31, and mostly, this does. Sperm is said to last 4-6 days in a woman's reproductive tract.  (Some research says it can last longer, but other research suggests it's not even strong enough to penetrate the egg by day 6.) Given the time gap between March 31 and April 6, (not to mention that Man B had a lot more opportunity between April 1-9), it sounds like Man A's chances of being the dad are very slim.

Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be research out there on the length of sperm longevity in the woman's body that says "absolutely positively guaranteed no 6-day sperm can produce a baby," which is why I say "very slim" and not zero. If this is life and death (such as, an abortion hangs in the balance if the answer can't be determined), do a prenatal DNA test with both men. But if you intend to have the baby in any case, the odds are strong enough that Man B is the father that in your shoes I would go forth in the pregnancy assuming he is, then do a DNA test when the baby is born, to put the question behind you forever. Do both men know there is this (slight) question about paternity?



Neither men know, unfortunately abortion does hang in this corner and I don’t want to this why I’m begging for man b I made a stupid mistake, and unfortunately do not have enough money for a prenatal paternity test right now :(
And would Man A help with the cost of the test?
No he blocked me on everything
I assume Man B knows you're pregnant -- what would happen if you told him a prenatal DNA test would be a condition of your continuing the pregnancy, would he just shrug? Or would he want you to continue the pregnancy if he was sure the baby was from him? (Because it sounds most likely to be.)
He would leave me to the streets. Itd have to be in secret but unfortunately money is an issue.
Ravgen does do something called "discreet" testing, using a swab from the rim of a drinking glass or a toothbrush to get the sample from the man. If things are really as dire as being left to the streets, you could possibly go that route (if you can raise the funds). You might just check Ravgen's website or call them, to see how much it costs.

Otherwise, take some comfort in the fact that the odds do favor Man B by a long way. If you went ahead without knowing for sure, you'd need to set a plan for if the baby was born and was not from Man B, but you're unlikely to have to use it because of his low odds.

I don't want to seem overly opinionated, but if your choices for the father of the baby are a guy who blocked you on everything just on the off-chance the baby is from him (which, he can't block a summons to do a DNA test, so he's being entirely stupid) and a guy who would leave you to the streets, what are you doing with either man? They both sound like jerks. You might consider being a happy single mother, with the help of your lawyer regarding DNA tests and child support. The baby, not you, has legal rights to one of them, and the men can't get out of that obligation by blocking or threatening you.
Sorry I didn’t see your reply I talked to ravgen and I don’t really have $1200 right now. And it’s just sad. Both men aren’t the greatest at all but I would rather it be man bs any day.
Avatar universal
Hi Kate! You seem to be knowledgeable and to have done your research. I would lean heavily on ManB because of the greater exposure and better contact close to ovulation. ManA was more than the usual 5 days before ovulation. If ManA used no contraception and ManB always did I might be less certain.
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I really hope so honestly, it was a one time thing with man a and no contraception was used. Man b always no contraception as well.
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