Do antidepressants cause a lack of creativity?

[Loribop]

I am on Pristiq (the new Effexor) and have not painted since starting the med a few years ago.  Recently I set up all the things I need to paint, but I have no motivation to create.  I have started to slowly mean myself off Pristiq and will be seeing my psychiatrist tomorrow to discuss.  I have no sex drive and feel numb.  Are these feeling due to what I am going thru in my life (divorce, losing most of my pets, moving, losing my condo, owing money)? Or is it a side affect of antidepressants?  I want to paint again.  I don't want to become overwhelmed by feelings of guilt and sadness as a result of leaving my husband and my home.  I deal with these feelings at least once a day.  Life is hard enough, and I've taken antidepressants on and off for about 10 years.  I am scared to go off Pristiq, but I want to feel alive.  Prior to being on meds I only felt deep sadness and despair.  I can honestly say the meds took that away.  So if it's a toss up between not feeling despair and extreme sadness, but also losing creativity and sex drive Vs. being depressed but feeling creative, which should I choose?  When I am depressed I can't get out of bed and don't have the energy to paint anyway.  I think if I choose to go off the meds, I have to replace the pills with exercise, therapy, yoga (or some sort of relaxation) and nutrition.  These things should be my new SSRI. It's a lot more work than taking a pill, but worth it, I hope.  

This turned out to be more like a journal than a post!  Does anyone have experience with this?  Has anyone had to make this choice?  I, in no way, want to convince anyone to stop taking meds.  They have a very important role in our lives.  I just wonder if I should take a break.  My head is pounding and I have brain zaps, nausea, and dizziness as a result of cutting back on Pristiq.  I remember going off Effexor and it was pure misery.  I'm not looking forward to the next month or so, but I think i need to give this a try.  I can always go back on meds if I feel horrible off them.  Please share your experiences about this topic with me, as I could use the advice.

Lori

Lori

[hellayella]

Hey there,

I also experienced the 'blunting' effect you've described, after discontinuing Paxil 5 years ago. I don't know whether it's got a similar action to the drug you're on (though I think both are SSRIs, at least). In my case, the numbness has lessened considerably. The urge to create hasn't come back in full swing - at least not through the art form I studied all my life. I am, however, enjoying trying other forms of performance. No career changing successes yet, but a few hearty ones - small steps!

You probably have learned by now (perhaps through another forum) that many, many creative people have also had their drive dampened by the 'blunting' phenomenon.  We all take heart in evidence of neuroplasticity. Your brain isn't broken.

I think the only way to regain your sensitivity it, and to challenge yourself in new ways. Being around others who value your art, and art in general helps to maintain your belief that it's a viable commitment. Try edging your way around what you used to do - have a go at totally unrelated forms. You may be familiar with Julia Cameron's The Artist's Way - lots of people have benefitted from the exercises.

Drive is something else. I think it's useless to think too much about where your work can lead, or what it means for your identity - i.e., try not to catastrophize. Focus on one task to love at a time, and put yourself in the right company. Things will happen, maybe not in the ways you would have predicted.

Also - yoga is touted around as a catch all for every existential and psychological ailment around. That's because it helps. Google 'mindfulness meditation' to see what research has been done, and maybe try it out... also just keeping the body in some kind of motion supports your sense of vitality, relaxes you, keeps your heart rate steady, muscles limber, etc, without being too challenging when you're getting over the drug. I.e., creates the conditions for a good mood; primes your body to not be stressed.

How are you doing these days?

[NikoK]

I can't speak personally to the issue, re: meds- however, my mother is a brilliant artist (paint, drawing), and she developed epilepsy about 15 years ago.
One of her meds is similar to the benzos and she's had difficulty even WANTING to draw or paint since she started taking her AEDs- which in many ways are similar to antidepressants, in that they change neurochemistry (yet, through radically different means).
She has found exercise helpful- after a walk she is more thoughtful and tends to pick up a brush- but I've watched her deire to BE the artist she's been forever, wane, throughout this process.
Don't give up, though- one day, about 2 years ago, she surprised us with a drawing of irises that would have made van Gogh proud!  It's not OVER- just HARDER, I think----
Good luck- I truly wish you the best with my heart.

[Loribop]

That's very interesting and make a lot of sense.  I went off the meds for the holidays so I could paint gifts for people.  I had to go back on them in January.  It's a different combination of meds, and a lower dosage, so I don't feel like a zombie.  Of course, I can't create but that's the trade off.  I'm not sure if I'm going to do it next Novemer or not.  Probably not.  I don't think it's good to go back and forth like that.   It's funny my sister is on meds and she can create.  So lucky!

[Vintendo56]

One of the reasons we go through cycles of depression and mood swings is the abstract part of our brains can't shut off.  We try to sleep and the thoughts just rush and rush and rush until we see the sun come up, heave a big sigh and try to make it through the day, only to have the same thing happen again and again until we are finally down the hole.

Most anti-depressants are chemically designed to block abstract thought, thought to be the root cause of depression, but abstract thinking is where we get our artistic thought from too.  It would be great to have our cake and eat it too, but in my experience an anti-depressant either turns me into Gork the Stone Man, or if it leaves me basically normal it blunts the artistic/abstract side to where I can't do any of the creative things I love to do.  And Big Pharma makes way more money keeping you fluctuating back and for the between meds than they ever would with a cure, so sadly enough don't hope for a cure.

But please don't overdo the depression in the name of your art.  The world needs all the laughter and beauty it can get.

[abitofsumisu]

I was recently placed on mood stabilizers and anti-depressants.  I have had a creative block ever since I have been on them.  It feels kind of like a haze, its very strange to describe.  I found though that when I looked deep inside and started asking myself questions I realized I was making a lot of excuses.  I didn't feel like I was good enough, I live with my parents - what if I made a mess and my likewise bi polar mother became furious (our house is OCD clean).  I came up with a thousand and one reasons, and I think the hardest thing is getting past that and trying not to blame it all on the meds.  I'm not a scientific person, but I design and draw (when I feel like it) the same way I always have, its just sometimes finding the time and getting the motivation.

I hope this help, just ask yourself why you can't get yourself to paint and tell yourself over and over I will paint.  I have to tell myself in the car sometimes "I will go to the gym" (that's my big hangup) "I will go to the gym and keep myself healthy".  It's damn hard, and today I didn't do it.  All days are not great days.  Sometimes we all feel lonely, depressed, we don't feel like going to the gym.  Sometimes we just gotta kick ourselves in the butt and say do it - but sometimes we can't always do that.  I think on meds sometimes the challenge becomes greater.  However as I said I still paint, draw, and design the same way before I was on bipolar meds.

I hope this helps. : /

[slattery]

I would have said that my Effexor XR (several years) has not had that effect on me. But possibly, I no longer can judge objectively. It sounds like you're doing quite well now and I hope that continues for you. I too left my spouse amidst depression and know that both guilt and confidence can accompany such a decision. Be well. Now I'll look up Pristiq. It's remarkable anyone can wean themselves off Effexor.