Is this depression or what? PLEASE HELP

[mandyisme]

someone I love dearly is having a serious problem.  We, his family, are trying to figue out what is wrong with him.  First of all, he doesn't think he has a problem.  He doesn't seem to understand that his line of thinking is not normal.  It has progressively gotten worse as he has gotten older.  Here is the problem.  He is extremely critical of others but for some reason tends to zoom in on one person and magnify their faults.  Someone may talk to him shortly and he gets upset about it for months.  He doesn't sleep, he has suicidal thoughts, has deep anger for the person who he has zoomed in on.  The persons he is obsessed with changes over the years... he becomes obsessed with different people as time passes.  The things these people do are wrong or anooying but do not direclty affect him and people do stuff like that all the time.  ie: talking shortly with him.  I believe he has depression and just sort of tries to channel or self justify all of his feelings as being from whatever event triggered his feelings and blaiming his problems are a direct result of whatever happened to him.   He is also extremely picky with performing his responsibilities such as at work or elsewhere.  He makes a very big deal out of everything he does and believes he is the only person capable of doing them correctly and overreacts if things do not go his way.  He also is always desiring for a huge change in his life like a job change or a big move to somwhere far off.  Could this be depression or what?  Have you ever heard or experienced anything similar?  It is quite sad to see someone you love not enjoy life over minor controversies.  We tried to talk to him about going to see a pshchiatrist but he doesn't believe there is anything wrong with his line of thinking.

[bbaggins]

The doctor will only tell you that they can't help the patient unless the patient wants help.

My dad has depression, I know he has depression, but he says he's fine, yet he'll cry for no reason, become easily agitated, etc., but still refuses to believe he suffers from depression. I talked to his doctor about it, and actually brought him in to his doctor to discuss it, but he still denied he had depression and even lied to the doctor about his symptoms (while I was sitting there with him). In the end, the doctor told me there's not much she can do unless he wants treatment himself.

In Florida, though, they have what's called the Baker Act where people can forcibly be taken for mental evaluation, but I really don't want to resort to that.

[kimdavis5]

If he won't go to a dr., you might want to go and discuss this with one yourself.

[M4Y0U]

It sounds like Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and/or Passive-aggressive behavior. There may be an underlying depression too.

the diagnosis should be made by a qualified psychiatrist.

M4

[mammo]

Unfortunately he has to want help to get help.  But if you feel he is suicidal then you can do an intervention and get him into the hopsital where he can get evaluated and start treatment.  It sounds like he has anger issues, which can go along with depression, or this may just be his personality.  If you think the suicide threats are real then you need to somehow address this with the proper authorities.  It sounds like he either needs attention or wants attention, in his effort to always be correct.  It's tough when it's an adult who has to decide himself if he needs or wants help, and the family feels he does. If intervening saves his life you need to do it, if not it may cause a big rift in the family.  It's a tough decision, I wish you luck and take care.