What is my purpose in life? I keep seaching

[Martianna]

I have been married to my childhood sweetheart for 9 years , he is a transgender and an acholic. He spends money all the time and I feel like we are going to lose our home.  I am very ill and work a part time job.  However, I don't make the money he does and I have a lot of medical bills.  We have slept in different rooms for over a year.  It is more important for him to be a women instead of my spouse.  I have no where to go and it seems like my situation is never going to get better.  I drag my self to work everyday, for what. I truly don't know what to do.  He has be emotionally, physically and mentality abusive.  My name is on the mortgage, I have medical bills and credit card bills.  I just don't know why I'm here. I have to be fake all the time, to customers, my family and I'm just sick of it all.  I thought being 47 I should be living my life instead of wishing I would just die.

[birdie0907]

You haven't filled in your status so I don't know if you live in a city. If so there should be a distress center you could call for advice 24 hours.

[Bubulous]

I really can't relate much on your particular situation but I wanted to say hey and try to offer some support.  I have an exercise that I like to try if you are up for it?