FIRST TIME IVF - NEGATIVE RESULT :((

[chez73m]

Hi guys, this is my first post I am new to this site.
I am 38 years old and have been with my partner neally 4 years, there is nothing medically wrong with us both but I could not fall pregnant, so I decided on IVF as I know a few people that have now done this.
Unfortunately for me I did a test 11 days after 3 day transfer and it was negative this morning, I was supposed to do it exactly 2 weeks after the transfer but me being impatient i couldn't wait, now i feel such a failure, i cry at anybody with a bump, (sounds very bitter doesn't it) but i don't mean to be its just I want to say 'why not me' its my time,
Its so hard to take rejection and i am not dealing with this very well, my friend had IVF (only time) and she didn't get a success but two months later she is now pregnant, i am so happy for her, i found out today but I still felt like a knife twisted into my stomach, i don't want to feel this way and I don't mean to im happy for anyone who falls pregnant, I feel left out and this forum site is really helping me overcome this sadness.. As I write this I have on/off stomach cramps, like im going to get my period, my partner rang the nurse and said i was silly doing the test as it could be inaccurate, but i know my own body, i have not stopped crying, I will still take the pessaries until I do the test again this friday (although i don't hold much hope for a positive)
just wanted to ask really if my test could have been wrong, and why am i having tummy cramps like period pains and headaches? could this be the hormones still .

[babyhope40527]

Chez - i wish your home test was false and your beta turns out positive, having said that, i must agree with you that we understand our own body better than anyone and we could sense, so you may have to be prepared for both good and bad, this might sound rude but i dont want you to be too shocked and disappointed later, and whatever you are now going through is pretty obvious as a human being and there is nothing wrong in being jealous of preg women, afterall, our body is a combination of so many hormones,

you know what, first IVF is a lucky charm for very few, mostly like 80% have to go for second or third, and you know what, the pain heals and you feel better as the days pass, i am trying my fourth attempt now and am so numb and neutral emotionally and so prepared for a failure.

never know, your miracle might be its way soon, dont hurt yourself so much emotionally, move on with other stuff, keep yourself busy, just believe that you will be mom soon, may be 2013 we deliver our babies, good luck.

[run_t]

Chez73m, you can never be sure you wouldn't get a positive result. Please be relaxed and keep the hope alive until proven otherwise. Sincerely I understand how you feel, have also been married for four (4) years and still trying to concieve. Have had 5failed IUI's and recently (March) a failed IVF am still trying to heal though. I believe our miracles will be delivered this month of joy. It is such a painful experience but I believe God who has done for others will also make us joyful mothers. I have colleagues who say 'I don't want this pregnancy' 'I have to be on family planning cos am sure I will get pregnant if not' and here are people who are trying to get it by all means. It is well with us.

[D3termined]

I feel your pain bc I had a failed cycle Dec '11 (a wk b4 Christmas). I recommend you doing beta and "if" it's neg go forth with an FET or ano fresh Ivf if you can. Having a plan B helps move away from the past. Wishing you luck and by the way my Bestie called to tell me she was pg right b4 my Ivf started so I know about that too. Hugs!!!

[yrfaith_82]

you should still have your beta done regardless sometimes the hpt can be wrong but i also tested early and it was neg. i understand completely how you feel bc i just had my beta done on monday it was neg. i too feel like why cant i have the joy of carrying a beautiful baby within and lovely him/her uncond. but i am grateful for my 16yr old daughter with some mental issues. please dont give up there is still hope.