Gas station and hiv risks?

[Wanda1worry]

I recently pumped gas at the gas station and when I squeezed the gas pump handle to pump gas, I felt a weird pain in my hand. I looked at the handle and noticed that the sides of the handle had edges that stuck out a bit and that was what made my hand feel weird. The pump was also a little wet and it appeared to be clear.I cant help but think I've been poked by a needle at the pump and the wetness was bodily fluid. Now I'm stressed out that I have caught hiv. I even went back to the pump and touched it again to feel the edges and I was looking for a needle but found nothing. Do you think it's possible I was poked by a dirty needle and not know? I mean it felt sharp wheb I squeezed but I just continued to pump my gas thinking it was the handles edges that were sticking out a bit. I also used hand sanitizer on my hands after so I'm not sure if I was bleeding as it did not appear to be bleeding but maybe the hand sanitizer wipes it off. Can someone please help and tell me if this sounds like a real hiv concern? Additionally I recently have been dwelling about my last doctors appointment. I always keep my doctor late and she gets behind in her appointments talking to me so long as I ask a lot of questions. I recently had to get a shot as i was due and also had a pap exam. My appointment was like 1.5 hrs long because I just ask questions. I'm all stressed out now that because I made her late for others appointments that they would intentionally use a used needle to give me my shot or used equipment to do my pap. Also the doctor knows that I had an abortion last year and I'm worried that if she thinks I am a terrible person for doing that they would intentionally use dirty stuff on me also because they know my extreme fear of catching hiv. I tested for hiv at my appointment that day and it was negative but now since that all happened I feel like I got it again. In addition to that and the gas pump situation I feel so stressed. Should u be worried does this sound rational or like a real situation where I was a risk for hiv?

[Kirstie_MHModerator]

Please heed the advice of the multiple members who have taken the time to respond to you.  No one is hiding HIV-infected needles on gas pumps, and no one is trying to maliciously infect you at a clinic.  There is nothing more we can say about the irrational thoughts you are having except to reiterate that you should seek therapy to help with these intrusive thoughts.

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[Chima7]

This is not an HIV problem, it's a mental health issue. Your next steps should include finding a therapist who can help you navigate the reasons why you have these irrational phobias and how to overcome them and have a normal life.

[CurfewX]

You're having irrational thoughts and should definitely seek therapy.  You don't have to live this way.

You would know if someone stabbed you with a needle, without a doubt.  And distrust of medical professionals, assuming they would risk their livelihoods to somehow punish you, is also not rational or logical.

[Wanda1worry]

I never said someone stabbed me with a needle my fear is that a needle was under the gas handle and that was the weird feeling I felt

[AnxiousNoMore]

That is a paranoid thought that somehow a needle was on a gas pump. It doesn't make sense. See your doc and perhaps a therapist to deal with your needle fears.

[Wanda1worry]

I heard of it happening