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Paralyzing fear of HIV and questions about blood counts
I am a 21 year old girl from Italy who had a high risk situation exactly four years ago. I was in a relationship with a man from a country with a very high HIV prevalence rate. He was a compulsive liar and a narcissist. All I know about him is that in reality he had had numerous relationships before me, and he was sexually very active. He had tattooed his ex-girlfriends name on his arm, and when I asked about it, he told me she had died (but he was a genuine liar so I will never know).
I had unprotected vaginal sex with him more than 30 times. I was easily lured into his games, he was ten years older than me and my first sex partner. I was inexperienced and naive.
Because of this, I am living in paralyzing fear of HIV.
I have one question that I have been thinking. Answers would help me to prepare for the test mentally. (Just to make sure: I am going to get tested, I know it is the only way to know your status. But I need something that I can hold on to, to count the odds sort of, good or bad, because at the moment I am too afraid!)
QUESTION: Because of my stomach aches, which are caused by stress-related peptic ulcer (no wonder), all kinds of blood tests were taken from me last week. Liver, kidneys, full blood count etc. Everything was perfect, except my white blood cell count was slightly elevated. Also, my hemoglobin was 15, which is oddly high for me, as it has been 12-13 earlier all my life.
So, if I was infected with HIV four years ago, would my blood count by now show at least something that is common for HIV+ people, even something minor? Wouldn't HIV show in complete blood count as generally lower white blood cell count, at least broadly? Or would something else show? Would hemoglobin be affected? Does my complete blood count, etc, results seem similiar to what are common with HIV+ people?
And might there be any other signs of HIV if you have been infected for four years?
Any insight to my situation, and answers to my questions would be so much appreciated!
I had unprotected vaginal sex with him more than 30 times. I was easily lured into his games, he was ten years older than me and my first sex partner. I was inexperienced and naive.
Because of this, I am living in paralyzing fear of HIV.
I have one question that I have been thinking. Answers would help me to prepare for the test mentally. (Just to make sure: I am going to get tested, I know it is the only way to know your status. But I need something that I can hold on to, to count the odds sort of, good or bad, because at the moment I am too afraid!)
QUESTION: Because of my stomach aches, which are caused by stress-related peptic ulcer (no wonder), all kinds of blood tests were taken from me last week. Liver, kidneys, full blood count etc. Everything was perfect, except my white blood cell count was slightly elevated. Also, my hemoglobin was 15, which is oddly high for me, as it has been 12-13 earlier all my life.
So, if I was infected with HIV four years ago, would my blood count by now show at least something that is common for HIV+ people, even something minor? Wouldn't HIV show in complete blood count as generally lower white blood cell count, at least broadly? Or would something else show? Would hemoglobin be affected? Does my complete blood count, etc, results seem similiar to what are common with HIV+ people?
And might there be any other signs of HIV if you have been infected for four years?
Any insight to my situation, and answers to my questions would be so much appreciated!
Again.what are you waiting for,get tested and put this anxiety behind you.Only an hiv test result will set you free.Everything else is obsolete.
Natalina, the way HIV functions is quite interesting.
The reason why determining that you have HIV with CBCs is completely useless, is because you could have HIV and still fall within normal reference intervals on the test. HIV is a clever little pest of a virus, and it isn't the disease that makes you sick, it is the infections and the disorders that you become more susceptible to, due to the HIV virus impacting your immune system.
Like someone said above, don't go looking for the hints, go looking for the answer.
The reason why determining that you have HIV with CBCs is completely useless, is because you could have HIV and still fall within normal reference intervals on the test. HIV is a clever little pest of a virus, and it isn't the disease that makes you sick, it is the infections and the disorders that you become more susceptible to, due to the HIV virus impacting your immune system.
Like someone said above, don't go looking for the hints, go looking for the answer.
Thank you so much for your answer, joggen. It seems surprising if my changes of being positive could really be that low (actually it would be a little higher though, because for a woman the odds of getting HIV from a positive man is 1 in 500). It is good to realise this, because I have been living with feeling of 100% certainty of being HIV+.
What you write gives me a little bit of hope, exactly what I need right now, and it gives me the courage to go get tested!
What you write gives me a little bit of hope, exactly what I need right now, and it gives me the courage to go get tested!
You need to separate the emotional fallout from your bad relationship from the medical facts of your situation. The virus doesn't care whether your partner was a "compulsive liar and a narcissist" or if your relationship was "traumatizing". Your chance of infection depends on 1. the likelihood that your partner was infected and 2. the frequency of transmission. Since you gave me a cryptic answer you still don't provide enough information for me to assess the first criteria, but I'll just assume that your partner was at the highest possible risk- a black man from S. Africa. This will allow me to put your risk in perspective.
The prevalence of HIV in S. African black men is 20% (1 out of 5). The average frequency of transmission from an infected male to a female is 1 in 1000 exposures. Thus, your risk from any single exposure from this man would be 1 in 5000. Let's assume for the sake of simplicity that you had 50 exposures to this man. Your overall risk would be at most 50/5000, or 1%, meaning that there is more than a 99% chance that you are HIV negative.
I hope that you can see from this that the chances that you are HIV negative are very good (and may even be better if your partner was not a black man from S. Africa). But at this point, the bottom line is that you are either infected or you are not. What is done is done and an HIV test isn't going to change whether you are infected or not, it will simply provide you the information that you need to move on with your life. Believe it or not, the stress of not knowing whether you are infected is much worse than learning that you are infected, because even if your test is positive, there are actions that you can take to stay healthy. You can't do that if you have an undiagnosed HIV infection.
The prevalence of HIV in S. African black men is 20% (1 out of 5). The average frequency of transmission from an infected male to a female is 1 in 1000 exposures. Thus, your risk from any single exposure from this man would be 1 in 5000. Let's assume for the sake of simplicity that you had 50 exposures to this man. Your overall risk would be at most 50/5000, or 1%, meaning that there is more than a 99% chance that you are HIV negative.
I hope that you can see from this that the chances that you are HIV negative are very good (and may even be better if your partner was not a black man from S. Africa). But at this point, the bottom line is that you are either infected or you are not. What is done is done and an HIV test isn't going to change whether you are infected or not, it will simply provide you the information that you need to move on with your life. Believe it or not, the stress of not knowing whether you are infected is much worse than learning that you are infected, because even if your test is positive, there are actions that you can take to stay healthy. You can't do that if you have an undiagnosed HIV infection.
Thanks everyone taking the time to reply to my post. Altough it is still unclear to me if HIV infection alterates complete blood count results or not.
My partner was from the country where there are more HIV positive people than anywhere else in the world. And I got the impression he dislikes condoms, and his past is extremely risky. I have a good reason to believe he might be positive. If he was HIV+, I think it is true that I am infected with 100% certainty.
I have to gather the strength to go to the test, but currently I am completely paralyzed with fear, and could not handle a positive result.
My partner was from the country where there are more HIV positive people than anywhere else in the world. And I got the impression he dislikes condoms, and his past is extremely risky. I have a good reason to believe he might be positive. If he was HIV+, I think it is true that I am infected with 100% certainty.
I have to gather the strength to go to the test, but currently I am completely paralyzed with fear, and could not handle a positive result.
Only having an hiv test is going to provide you with the answer you seek.All the best.
It's a waste of time to be trying to look for hints, whether it is in blood counts or symptoms. There are more important factors in your favor- you don't even know whether this person had HIV, and you weren't with him for very long. Both mean that the odds are in your favor that your test result will be negative.
What was the country that your partner was from?
What was the country that your partner was from?
I know a blood count won't tell my status, but couldn't there be hints?
I have read HIV+ blood counts commonly show leukopenia, thrombocytopenia and sometimes anemia.
Can I take a little hope in the fact that I don't have any of those conditions, but the contrary? I am going to get tested, but I need a little hope so I could do it.
I am doing my best to gather the strenght. The relationship was very traumatizing for me, but if he also infected me with HIV I don't know if I can survive that. HIV itself I could live with, but the idea of who gave it to me and under what conditions it is too much.
I have read HIV+ blood counts commonly show leukopenia, thrombocytopenia and sometimes anemia.
Can I take a little hope in the fact that I don't have any of those conditions, but the contrary? I am going to get tested, but I need a little hope so I could do it.
I am doing my best to gather the strenght. The relationship was very traumatizing for me, but if he also infected me with HIV I don't know if I can survive that. HIV itself I could live with, but the idea of who gave it to me and under what conditions it is too much.
A blood count won't tell you anything about your HIV status. The only way to know your status is through an antibody test.
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