Aa
Silly Mistake
So here goes,
Firstly I'd like to say thanks to the people who contribute to this forum. It has helped ease my anxiety somewhat, but we all know how it is, constant reassurance seems to be a necessity through these difficult times. I sometimes think I could accept the bad news that I had a far more lethal condition such as cancer, I think it's the fact that we go out there and for whatever reason, bring this trouble on ourselves that makes it so hard to deal with. The what if questions, the guilt, that what I think eats away at us.
So, my risky episode occured two weeks ago in Cape Town, South Africa. Now I'm sure you'll be surprised to see that from a little research, this country has a series HIV/AIDS problem. According to statistics, 20% of the population are somehow infected! In my particualr case, a young woman I met in a bar whilst intoxicated, in her 20's, for females of that age group apparently one in three are infected, and surprise surprise, this tends to be be more prevalent among those who are sexually active and change partners often, hence the kind of lady you meet in a bar and who goes to bed with you after four hours! Stupidity no knows bounds on my part!
Whether she was a prostitute or not, I'm not sure, she did ask for some money to help her out the next day, but alas I don't think it makes any difference whether she is or not. I believe the risk is equally as high. She also had flu like symptoms and was coughing alot, she seemed to be phlemged up alot, but hey, we all get the flu right?
So, in my intoxicated mind I seduced this coughing spluttering lady back to my room thinking that if it sticks to oral all should be fine! Playing with fire, I think she even told me I was playing with fire at one stage, but oh no, I was the cool confident guy not giving a damn at that particular moment in time.
So basically I somehow managed to keep the act confined to fellation and cunnlingus, I even licked her bum at one stage, well maybe several times....I'm a disgusting animal I know! At one stage I think she tried to mount my **** but as scanty as my intoxicated mind was, I'm entirely certain I put a quick stop to this and I'm pretty certain her vagina did not come in contact with my penis. If that was her intention, there was no move whatsoever to put a rain coat on me.
Now, I hate to say it, I went a bit rough on the young lady and did thrust into her mouth several times, she had no objections anyway. So that was my encounter.
I should also mention that I had a wisdom tooth extraction 19 days previous. I still had the stitches in my mouth but the wound had healed up, bar a small section of remaining stitch that sometimes bled when brushed. Unfortunately, we both brushed our teeth before getting down and dirty so I've seen from some sources that increases the chance of transmission due to small scratches in the lining of the mouth. I don't remember any blood from my wisdom tooth at this time, cause my brushing skills were as much affected as my common sense, so I think I completely missed that section of the mouth.
So, approximately six or seven hours post incident I notice a slight burning sensation from the top of my urethra when urinating. Now, I was prodding and poking at it before that so I'm not sure if that caused the issue, or perhaps I hit one of her teeth and caused the trouble when I was performing my porno style thrusting! Anyway, I kept pulling and checking this until my urethra bled a little...that freaked me out no ends. I'm not sure whether this bleeding occured during the fellatio or perhaps I caused it myself.
So there you have it, at two weeks I'm a right old mess, waking up sweating & shouting, walking around looking at the footpath, and the issue never leaves my mind. Purgatory! I'm sure I'm going to give myself as illness worrying.
I went to my doctor, who's a swell guy, and he tells me to test at three months and at six months, although he did admit that three months was almost conclusive. As far as I'm aware, they use the antibody detection test here (western europe), I don't know the exact details of this test. Although I didn't mention the abrasion in the urethra to him but did mention the stitches, he thinks my risk is "next to zero" and that I would be fierce unlucky to have contracted the virus. He believes that it generally takes multiple encounters to pass the virus.
So, here's my promise. I think most can agreee that the person I played around with was risky. I've read many posts from the wonderful Mr. HHH and other doctors saying that oral is almost no risk as regards transmission of hiv. I generally believe that saliva can neutralise the virus, but I can't help thinking that my little wounds (both ends) put me at a greater risk. Considering these wounds, I'm also slightly concerned about hep c (I'm hep b vaccinated).
So, if I test positive at three months, I'm going to come back here and let everybody know that oral does carry a risk. Outside of this episode, I'm a safe guy, and have had only five female sexual partners in my life.
I hope to god that I test negative, and am extremely scared for the future. I'm also preparing myself for the worst, and trying to assure myself that a positive result, although hard to deal with is not the end of the world.
Sorry for the lenght of this and thanks for reading.
Firstly I'd like to say thanks to the people who contribute to this forum. It has helped ease my anxiety somewhat, but we all know how it is, constant reassurance seems to be a necessity through these difficult times. I sometimes think I could accept the bad news that I had a far more lethal condition such as cancer, I think it's the fact that we go out there and for whatever reason, bring this trouble on ourselves that makes it so hard to deal with. The what if questions, the guilt, that what I think eats away at us.
So, my risky episode occured two weeks ago in Cape Town, South Africa. Now I'm sure you'll be surprised to see that from a little research, this country has a series HIV/AIDS problem. According to statistics, 20% of the population are somehow infected! In my particualr case, a young woman I met in a bar whilst intoxicated, in her 20's, for females of that age group apparently one in three are infected, and surprise surprise, this tends to be be more prevalent among those who are sexually active and change partners often, hence the kind of lady you meet in a bar and who goes to bed with you after four hours! Stupidity no knows bounds on my part!
Whether she was a prostitute or not, I'm not sure, she did ask for some money to help her out the next day, but alas I don't think it makes any difference whether she is or not. I believe the risk is equally as high. She also had flu like symptoms and was coughing alot, she seemed to be phlemged up alot, but hey, we all get the flu right?
So, in my intoxicated mind I seduced this coughing spluttering lady back to my room thinking that if it sticks to oral all should be fine! Playing with fire, I think she even told me I was playing with fire at one stage, but oh no, I was the cool confident guy not giving a damn at that particular moment in time.
So basically I somehow managed to keep the act confined to fellation and cunnlingus, I even licked her bum at one stage, well maybe several times....I'm a disgusting animal I know! At one stage I think she tried to mount my **** but as scanty as my intoxicated mind was, I'm entirely certain I put a quick stop to this and I'm pretty certain her vagina did not come in contact with my penis. If that was her intention, there was no move whatsoever to put a rain coat on me.
Now, I hate to say it, I went a bit rough on the young lady and did thrust into her mouth several times, she had no objections anyway. So that was my encounter.
I should also mention that I had a wisdom tooth extraction 19 days previous. I still had the stitches in my mouth but the wound had healed up, bar a small section of remaining stitch that sometimes bled when brushed. Unfortunately, we both brushed our teeth before getting down and dirty so I've seen from some sources that increases the chance of transmission due to small scratches in the lining of the mouth. I don't remember any blood from my wisdom tooth at this time, cause my brushing skills were as much affected as my common sense, so I think I completely missed that section of the mouth.
So, approximately six or seven hours post incident I notice a slight burning sensation from the top of my urethra when urinating. Now, I was prodding and poking at it before that so I'm not sure if that caused the issue, or perhaps I hit one of her teeth and caused the trouble when I was performing my porno style thrusting! Anyway, I kept pulling and checking this until my urethra bled a little...that freaked me out no ends. I'm not sure whether this bleeding occured during the fellatio or perhaps I caused it myself.
So there you have it, at two weeks I'm a right old mess, waking up sweating & shouting, walking around looking at the footpath, and the issue never leaves my mind. Purgatory! I'm sure I'm going to give myself as illness worrying.
I went to my doctor, who's a swell guy, and he tells me to test at three months and at six months, although he did admit that three months was almost conclusive. As far as I'm aware, they use the antibody detection test here (western europe), I don't know the exact details of this test. Although I didn't mention the abrasion in the urethra to him but did mention the stitches, he thinks my risk is "next to zero" and that I would be fierce unlucky to have contracted the virus. He believes that it generally takes multiple encounters to pass the virus.
So, here's my promise. I think most can agreee that the person I played around with was risky. I've read many posts from the wonderful Mr. HHH and other doctors saying that oral is almost no risk as regards transmission of hiv. I generally believe that saliva can neutralise the virus, but I can't help thinking that my little wounds (both ends) put me at a greater risk. Considering these wounds, I'm also slightly concerned about hep c (I'm hep b vaccinated).
So, if I test positive at three months, I'm going to come back here and let everybody know that oral does carry a risk. Outside of this episode, I'm a safe guy, and have had only five female sexual partners in my life.
I hope to god that I test negative, and am extremely scared for the future. I'm also preparing myself for the worst, and trying to assure myself that a positive result, although hard to deal with is not the end of the world.
Sorry for the lenght of this and thanks for reading.
You never had an exposure and if you did the DUO test is expensive and has no real advantages.
The HIV DUO test is extremely accurate at 4 weeks and has many advantages in regards to early detection and all the expert doctors in the expert doctors forum will tell you the same thing,I have already spoken to the mods about this issue and the information I am providing with regards to the DUO tests is totally correct.You can then follow up at 12 weeks for a final result.All the best to you.
Very well teak, I guess I'll test at the three month mark. I'll post my results here when they come through. And thanks again to all you guys, I'd be in a much worse state without the reassuring words and support you have provided.
Not all places use DUO testing because of the cost. Not only for the test but the analyzer. 161 dollars is steep to be paying for a test which gives no real advantages. Only a 3 month post exposure test will give you a conclusive negative test result had you had an exposure.
And thanks for your suggestion rainlover, unfortunately I'm not sure how available a HIV DUO is here in western europe. You tend to get whatever the laboratory uses. For less efficient tests, would the six week mark be satisfactory?
I wish I had teak, I regret being so stupid. Well, if i had the full function of my mind, I would have anbstinated. I have made the right decision many times in the past, but unfortunately this time, I slipped.
IF UNSURE, ASK BEFORE YOU PLAY.
Thanks Teak, rainlover & Lizzie Lou. I know you're right Teak, I'm aware that you are also hiv positive, and I know that it must be maddening for you to listen to guys like me taking such a conservative stance. But you must admit, that information out there in conflicting, and I just have this feeeling of anxiety from playing with something that is unknown to me.
What information should one believe when it's so conflicting?
What information should one believe when it's so conflicting?
No, it's because after 30 years there are still people uneducated about HIV and it's transmission.
You don't require an HIV test,but if you are going to insist on one then you have the option of the HIV DUO at 4 weeks which will be 99% accurate at this time frame.I am only suggesting this if you are go ahead with testing.Remember that you have been assessed as having had no risk for HIV infection.
Thanks guys for your swift responses and reassurance. I eternally appreciate the support of this forum. I think my anxiety springs from the fact at how stupid and cavalier my attitude was.
I constantly ask myself why I should be let off the hook for my stupid actions, whilst there are so many innocent children in the world who suffer from this virus and it's in no way their fault.
Unfortunately my mind will continue to punish me for my sins, and regardless of the studies and reassurances, I know that I will not rest easy until a test is completed post three months.
I know everybody is going to give out to me for being so worried, but from what I can see, this seems to be the human condition, people can't seem to let go their anxiety when it comes to hiv.
I constantly ask myself why I should be let off the hook for my stupid actions, whilst there are so many innocent children in the world who suffer from this virus and it's in no way their fault.
Unfortunately my mind will continue to punish me for my sins, and regardless of the studies and reassurances, I know that I will not rest easy until a test is completed post three months.
I know everybody is going to give out to me for being so worried, but from what I can see, this seems to be the human condition, people can't seem to let go their anxiety when it comes to hiv.
All STD questions need to be posted in the STD Forum.
After reading all this I can tell you that you never had a risk and that no testing is required at all.There was no unprotected penetrative vaginal or anal sex at all and all the other sexual activities you engaged in were safe as far as HIV transmission is concerned.Now as far as other more common STD's go,you can have an STD screen and put this matter behind you.All the best.
for future reference...all we needed was your exposure. everything else is irrelevant.
you had NO risk from what you've described.
you had NO risk from what you've described.
You are reading content posted in the HIV Prevention Community
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Frequency of HIV testing depends on your risk.
Post-exposure prophylaxis (PEP) may help prevent HIV infection.
