Stupidity

[dochelp]

Hi. I recently got back from a visit abroad where for some retarded reason I got a pro in a night club to come back to mine. She told one of my friends she was from madagascar.

Basically we had insertive sex (my finger inside her vagina) and then she gave me very brief oral sex. We then had intercourse with a condom but it then snapped - for how long it had been snapped for I'm not sure. We got another one and carried on.

The problems are 2 fold:
1) Afterwards I noticed I had a small (scabbed over) cut on my finger  - this was a typical cut you get from biting skin around your nails or something...but that had been inside her so not sure about that
2) Because the condom broke I'm very very scared of contracting HIV. And the finger issue does not help AT ALL

And because she was from the outskirts of Africa (spoke English not too bad and wasn't from a horrible bar - club in a 5* hotel) I'm bricking it even more!! The potential exposure was only 3 days ago so I dont know what to do.

Please can somebody help as I'm going out of my mind. I never thought I'd be in this situation- what I did was by far the stupidest thing known to man.

Thanks.

[LIZZIE LOU]

read dr. hansfield's statement again.  the call number is contracted out.  that is not to say that when you go there IN PERSON...that you are not going to be able to speak to someone.  BIG DIFFERENCE.

[Igotaboner]

I wish I could edit my post up above, anyway what I mean is that I've personally been to the CDC and asked a nurse in person what my risks were, and they said very minimal

So I know for a fact that when I call in I'm not reaching a contract answering service company

[Igotaboner]

^Lizzie I hate to disagree with you, but I've personally been to the CDC, and spoken with a nurse there when I was given my NAAT and ELISA test, they told me the same thing that you tell on these forums

Protected sex is protected sex.
Anyway we're getting off topic, sorry for thread bashing

[LIZZIE LOU]

FROM DR. HANSFIELD:

It's appropriate that you and others who call CDC's national HIV/STD hotline do not actually reach CDC, but a contract answering service company.  The telephone personnel there are not health professionals, not even health educators -- just low-paid lay persons with minimal training. They are required to give standard, stock answers.  I'm certain some of them learn on the job, and sometimes people probably get accurate, individualized advice.  But it's hit or miss at best.

so...ya know if you cant call the CDC and get accurate information...you sure arent going to get it from most other agencies.

one day last week...i called a place that is spoken about on here regularly.  i knew just what to ask the guy that answered the phone...and as i suspected...EVERYTHING he told me was WRONG ! ! !  of course...i called him out on it and pretty much left him speechless.  this is unfortunate that ppl that dont have a clue...will call somewhere they "think" they can trust...and receive inaccurate info.

[Igotaboner]

^Very true, I'm hoping that the CDC would be up to date with current info
But their answers were parallel with what is posted on these forums.
"protected sex is protected sex"

:)

[LIZZIE LOU]

i hate to disagree...lol...but it is RARE that you can actually speak to someone who is up to date on the latest and current information.  this can be a disadvantage.

[Igotaboner]

One suggestion I might make, if you're starting to feel antsy and getting really anxious, thinking about the "what ifs" try calling a nurse line or the cdc and ask them some questions. You'll be educating yourself as well as getting a little more reassurance. (Not saying the information you're getting here isnt reliable)

I was in a similar situation, although my exposure was fully protected I was freaking out everyday. I found that speaking to someone about it and asking every question I could think of and that really put my mind at ease.

[dochelp]

VERY good advice. I'll try my best!

[LIZZIE LOU]

since you are a self professed hypochondriac...let me suggest that you stay off the internet searching for "symptoms".  the mind is a powerful thing and it can actually cause physical symptoms.  dont add fuel to the fire of your anxiety.

[dochelp]

That does settle my mind somewhat. I consider myself quite the hypochondriac so I'm guessing you can imagine how I'm feeling. Anyway, thanks again for your responses.

[LIZZIE LOU]

" Is the best option to try to stay calm for 6 weeks, take a test, if its negative take another post 3 months then that will be conclusive? "   EXACTLY :)

the odds of a one time exposure... WITH SOMEONE WHO IS +...is 1 in 1,000.  the chance that she is + is pretty much slim to none...and the fact that you were protected until the condom failed...all plays to your favor.  with that being said...you still had a risk and need to test to know your status.

[dochelp]

By the way Lizzie Lou, do you agree with westofengland that the risk seems negligible or do you think differently?

[dochelp]

Thanks a lot for your quick responses on this - they are much appreciated. Is the best option to try to stay calm for 6 weeks, take a test, if its negative take another post 3 months then that will be conclusive? No need for the intermittent tests I've read about that aren't searching for the antibody but searching for the protein generated?

Thanks again.

[LIZZIE LOU]

a test at 6-8 weeks post exposure will give you a good indication of your status...and is unlikely to change at that point...but follow that up at 3 months for a conclusive result.

[westofengland]

HIV anxiety is not nice (understatement of the year) but try not to worry - from what I understand if your finger had a scab on it, the healing process was well underway so the risk was probably negligible. As for the condom breaking, it's probably worth getting tested for that but as the Doctors on the Doctors Forum point out, the risk from brief unprotected vaginal exposure is still quite low - and most 'pros' don't have HIV anyway

Your choice of language suggests you're from the UK so why not give one of the HIV helplines a ring, I found them to be really great

Good luck