It depends on what they are estimating. RVSP (or pulmonary pressure) upper limit is usually 35mmHg. A heart cath showing 40mmHg is the gold standard and is far superior in estimation of pulmonary pressures. This has to be adjusted for age. There was a large study (I'd have to find it to cite) where two geographically different areas were studied. They found that the normal pressure estimate was around 28mmHg in one area +/- 3.4mmHg whereas the other area with mean age of 54 years and higher BMI was 34mmHg +/- 7.9mmHg.
So taking age and BMI into consideration- as well as the advise of your cardiologist is recommended. Pulmonary Hypertension is usually a diagnosis based on evidence... not a disease in itself. They would need to look for right heart/atrium enlargement as well as your symptoms in whole.
Yes absolutely. Normal is 12-16 at rest and anything above 25 at rest is considered pulmonary hypertension. During exercise, anything above 30 is considered PAH. There are a number of causes which should be investigated, all of which can give a poor prognosis if ignored. I have no idea why your Doctor would feel 40 is ok based on an echo, which didn't look at your lungs for example. Just because your heart hasn't pathalogically altered yet, it doesn't mean this won't happen.