Just sharing my thoughts...

[fsknight]

We all get lost in the moments that we are experience something so close to us, something involving life and death. You start experiencing emotions and creating possibilities and situations that only worsen the situation. Anxiety, stress, feelings of helplessness, as well as images and thoughts of the worst things possible to happen all merge into a frightfully blissful symphony.

The interesting thing is that we are all still here even after all those events that we thought would bring us to our end including many of those who have had heart attacks and cardiac arrests. Some may have not been so lucky. The body, the mind, and indeed nature are powerful and complex entities. It is a blessing and a curse to be alive.

Since I am a Hypochondriac and an OCDist which is interesting as I am quite a logical and rational human, I can find myself severely obsessing over things, especially when I experience some form of irregularity with my heart or any other function or aspect of my body or my life... I try very hard to maintain a reasonable approach to things and I find that statistics are very useful in such situations as for example, with our hearts. If you have a structurally and electrically normal heart, then 'statistically' there is a VERY LOW chance of something fatal occurring from even the most intense and frightening events that many of us have experienced.  

All we can really do is have trust in ourselves, in our doctors, and in the universe all together for life will always unravel in front of us towards the only certainty in life which is death. Instead of living so many moments of life obsessing over death, we should accept it and live in harmony with its very prevalence, and instead enjoy every moment that we are still alive and breathing, with our hearts beating in whichever way they find fit.

I wish us all the best and if anyone has anything to share as far as their experiences and mental approaches, please do feel free to post as I look forward to reading and communicating.

I hope the moderators find this posting to be appropriate for this forum.

FSKnight

[fsknight]

I am happy to see that some of you have found comfort in my words as I was not expecting this. I am very glad that my words were of help as not only is it important to find comfort at times of struggle but it is also important to know that you are not alone in such struggles. The thoughts I had written came out of me after enduring a tough mental experience due to arrhythmia, palpitations, and the sort. I live alone which makes all these experiences that much more intense. We are all human and believe it or not we are VERY similar in may ways with our troubles, our feelings, our thoughts, and our reactions.

Most of the suffering I experience, aside from the physical sensations and symptoms involved (be them directly linked or indirectly linked due to anxiety etc...) are due more to the mental 'aftermath' of a palpitation or a 'perceived' arrhythmia... The anxiety, the depression, the fear, the 'what if?', the 'there is no way that all of this is fine or benign', (turning into a poet over here...), the 'am I dying of something hidden or malicious?', the' what the F**K is happening to me!'... I sometimes swear that anxiety or my mental approach is the culprit of half of my problems but funny enough I do not notice that I feel anxious! Is it possible to be anxious without even noticing it? Anyone with anxiety experience have an answer?

I find it hard to completely 'live in the moment' and not worry as sometimes the sensations experienced and the thoughts that follow are so real and intense that they completely overcome the rational approach but I find it critical to 'catch yourself' and enforce such an an approach as quickly and as calmly as possible...

I hope more of you read this and I hope more of you find it useful... One of the main reasons I am writing my thoughts, and maybe why you should too, is because it puts things into perspective and allows you to see the experience from outside of yourself for when it is solely from within your minds perspective, there are so many more levels and emotions that cloud the purity of the experience.

Its funny that as I sit here I am experiencing palpitations and awkward sensations but what can I do about it other than take a breath, collect my thoughts, and continue striding down this wonderful blessed and cursed path.

FSKnight

P.S.: If you want to get to know my experience(s) a little better, I have a post in the Expert Heart Disease forum titled 'Pre-Syncope With Aggressive Palpitation' which is quite long and filled with worries and questions but hey... that is what the Expert Forums are for. ;)

[rixsta]

very well said brother,your post is intelligent and logical at the same time.very happy to read your post.thankyou.

[cindy707]

I just wanted to add my two cents worth and say that i thought what you had written was absolutely one hundred percent the truth and on top of that i found it to be very beautiful and open and honest.  So many times on all of the sites everyone focus' on that what ifs, the could bes and the like and we forget i think that there is a bigger picture to look at here...all i want to say is thank you so much for your insight and i hope you have a wonderful holiday season.......(and you need to write a book or something it might be a best seller i think!!!)

[LindaTX]

I just read this at one of my lowest points and what you said helped me tremendously.  I'm tired of dealing with "the irregular heart" and sometimes just don't want to go on like this.  You are wise beyond your years and I thank you for writing this.    Linda

[beema36]

I don't have anything to add but wanted to say thank u. This is great and more helpful than u know.
Beema