New motherhood, Hep C and Alcoholism

[justinemarie]

I am sitting here tonight alone trying to herbally detox, from the sugar and the wine and the beer and the **** that has become out of control, yet again. I have been on this merry go round of one addiction or another all of my life, but now have this little 9 month girl needing me and witnessing me in all of my dramas and pain. Was recently put on Epilim, an anti-convulsant, after a brief discussion with a psychiatrist, for my manic behaviour and anxiety. It didn't really help and I put on weight and still drank and got anxious, but now, two days off it and I am actually feeling again.
I cannot get to a twelve step meeting - I need to, but my baby is here with me and my husband works until very late. I don't know anyone here, have no health professionals I feel I can trust to deal with the complications of having a high viral load of Hep C genotype 1B and positive since 1989, anxiety, alcohol and compulsive food issues, a husband of only one year who has no real idea what he has gotten into, and a baby. We have just moved here, i feel scared and just know I have to get this cycle out of my life, but what can one do without going to meetings? Any other mothers out there? Or anyone with some good ideas?

[new-sojourn]

Yes, I did clear by day 17, that was May 19, 2002.

My hair grew back, my skin is in good shape.  Many small 'opportunistic' skin and nail fungi and rashes and shinkles, etc have all cleared up.  W/o the hep c, my body could use its resources to heal and repair the whole body.

[scruffy]

And another thing(smile)-Talk to your husband-he needs to help you to do what you must to stay healthy for all three of you. frank

[Tallblonde]

Please ask your mental health provider to refer you to a colleague who does EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing).  It's an amazing tool that can, in one session, break through years of intense anxiety, depression, and post-tramautic stress.  I've known several people who have undergone this brief treatment (one or two sessions is generally all that's needed) and they all rave about the results. Do some research on Google and ask your therapist about it.  It sounds like you could finally get some much needed relief through this approach.

Good luck to you.

Susan

[scruffy]

If you can't get a sitter then bring your baby with you to an AA meeting. People there will help you figure things out. Your time to act is now. Your baby needs you. Your husband needs you. And YOU need YOU. My very best to you and my heart goes with you. frank

[cuteus]

if anything can motivate a woman to seek help and do better is that gaze of innocence and need, the complete dependance that little soul has on us.  I am not aware of support groups that cater to someone in your situation. It does not seem as if you have someone who can watch the baby while you attend a support meeting, is there a ministry or church you can access? Some priests actually earn psychology degrees and can provide professional counseling.\ I don't know if you are aware but hep c can cause depression and other extra hepatic symptoms, you might want to do a search of that term to familiarize yourself with the symptoms.
Who watches the baby when you see the psychiatrist? can you access their help?
This site http://www.focusas.com/SelfHelp.html  has a list of some of the most common support groups. The best therapy technique is one that combines medication with counseling (be it one on one or in a group).  
You have to discuss with your husband these feelings that are overpowering you, he needs to assist you in your quest for health. Do you have any family around?
What genotype are you? If you are a two, it is a 6 month period of treatment and you will rid yourself of a possible source of depression.  
You might want to try a web search of this term "women alcoholic online support group"  if you can't make it to a nearby group meeting, perhaps online support is more convenient, I got a lot of results from that search. also try the delphi forums, there are support groups for everything and you could get a bona fide helping organization in the privacy of your home until your child is older.
this forum:http://forums.delphiforums.com/hepcotb/messages, is hosted by a former alcoholic who recently completed his hep c treatment, please contact him for questions on your addiction and hep c. He has access to medical advice through an organization he is forming. He might be a good resource for you, his name is Lou(unico).
Don't delay making these contacts, some days you will feel better than others and feel that you can handle things, but the underlying problem is still there and will resurface, have resources available for those days.
good luck

[new-sojourn]

Well, I'll tell you a little secret.  You'll quit drinkin' when you want to.  I went to re-hab twice b/when they told me I would not live thru the nite in icu, I quit-nearly 5yrs ago.  I wanted to live more than I wanted to drink.

I personally think that the living virus sets up its own needs that over ride all our best intentions.  the VIRUS craves its favorite food-alcohol.  Now, to fight the virus, you gotta starve it.  To live, you gotta kill it.

If you think your out of control now, just wait until the toxin levels in your blood lead to encepholapathy.  Of course you won't remember it b/c you don't remember much of anything b/ boy do the people around you remember--esp kids.

I was in therapy for 6+yrs for depression, etc.  He gave me all sorts of drugs for all sorts of mental and emotional problems.

The funny thing is. all that depression, etc-binging on bad food, complusive neg behavior-just disappeared once I treated the hep c.

I know most will focus on the alcohol b/I think you need to treat the hep c and all its presenting symptoms first.  Most doctors now don't ask for you to be sober a yr or so first.  The willingness to follow tx correctly and completely is enuf.

  In the old days, doctors seemed to think only 'saints' could, would or should be treated and cured.  Hell that's a bunch bs!!

Now, until the Supreme Court rules otherwise, having hep c qualifies you for medical marijuanna if you're lucky enuf to live in an enlightened state.

B/the hep c will get you before anything else will.  Quit drinking long enuf to treat the hep c.  after a yr or so, you'll not need or desire to drink.

My depression just is gone!  I still struggle w/acitis so my 'weight' can vary.  If I get dehydrated, I still get 'confused' and thr pruitis is here to stay-phantom itching @ nite due to toxin build ups.

My liver failed before I was  correctly dx w/hep c. You've known for 16yrs.  I bet your entering the last stages.  Avoid alcohol and treat the hep c before everyone-most esp your child- avoid you.

[BronxRican007]

That's telling it like it is...being real!


one question...did u ever clear HCV? The reason I ask is because I have all sorts of skin problems now (I haven't started tx yet) and heard that it clears up post-tx.

Thanks
bronx

[Lulu2005]

I don't mean to be harsh here, but if you don't get your act together you are not going to see that precious child grow up. There are many things you can do on your own. Start here:
http://www.recoveryresources.org/ and look for on-line support groups. Or hire a babysitter and get yourself to a meeting. The money you save on wine will pay for a sitter for an hour or two.