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HECTOR Update - prognosis becomes dire
Hi everyone. :-)
I just want you to know I appreciate all of your support. For me it has never meant so much to me.
I rather not go into the details... but I can say that my last live cancer treatment did not help my situation and my circumstances unfortunately have worsened considerably and become dire now. I am still remain hopeful that somehow, someway, this is not the end of the road for me. I have told my doctor I want to continue to fight until all my options run out even if it entails high risky experimental procedures since I have nothing to lose. I have made clear I rather die fighting then be told "there is nothing else we can do for you, better get your affairs in order and prepare for the inevitable".
In the next few weeks I will repeat the liver cancer (TACE) procedure in hopes of eliminating what remains of the tumor that the last procedure was unable to kill.
I will also have a PET scan to search for tumors that may have spread to other parts of my body.
So I have been preoccupied with this recent turn of events and need to make end of life contingency plans. Therefore I have had to prioritize my time differently. So that is why I have not been around. I hope you can understand that this is the most difficult situation I have ever dealt with in my life and need to do everything I can to keep my inner hope alive despite the great statistical odds against me.
In no way is my absence online a disregard for all the prayers, well wishes, good vibes and support that I have received from so many of you. My appreciation of my good fortune of meeting so many caring and thoughtful will never diminish no matter what happens. That is something I am sure of and I want you to be sure of too.
I wish the best to all of you wherever you are on this hep C/liver disease journey. I feel fortune to be a member of such a great community of caring people.
Hector
4/23/2013
UCSF liver cancer patient, undetectable HCV for 32 weeks, cirrhosis and HCC
In liver transplantation, the Milan criteria are applied as a basis for selecting patients with cirrhosis and hepatocellular carcinoma (HCC) for liver transplantation. I am currently unable to be transplanted due to my liver cancer being outside the Milan criteria for transplant. This is because even if I had a transplant, I still would die from recurrence of HCC soon after transplant and it would be a poor use of a donor liver. My outcome wouldn't change and someone else might die because I received the donor liver that could have saved them and allowed them to live 10-20 years.
"It ain't over 'til it's over"
"Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't go to yours."
Yogi Berra - Philosopher and baseball great
Hector
4/23/2013
UCSF liver cancer patient, undetectable HCV for 32 weeks, cirrhosis and HCC
San Francisco, CA
I just want you to know I appreciate all of your support. For me it has never meant so much to me.
I rather not go into the details... but I can say that my last live cancer treatment did not help my situation and my circumstances unfortunately have worsened considerably and become dire now. I am still remain hopeful that somehow, someway, this is not the end of the road for me. I have told my doctor I want to continue to fight until all my options run out even if it entails high risky experimental procedures since I have nothing to lose. I have made clear I rather die fighting then be told "there is nothing else we can do for you, better get your affairs in order and prepare for the inevitable".
In the next few weeks I will repeat the liver cancer (TACE) procedure in hopes of eliminating what remains of the tumor that the last procedure was unable to kill.
I will also have a PET scan to search for tumors that may have spread to other parts of my body.
So I have been preoccupied with this recent turn of events and need to make end of life contingency plans. Therefore I have had to prioritize my time differently. So that is why I have not been around. I hope you can understand that this is the most difficult situation I have ever dealt with in my life and need to do everything I can to keep my inner hope alive despite the great statistical odds against me.
In no way is my absence online a disregard for all the prayers, well wishes, good vibes and support that I have received from so many of you. My appreciation of my good fortune of meeting so many caring and thoughtful will never diminish no matter what happens. That is something I am sure of and I want you to be sure of too.
I wish the best to all of you wherever you are on this hep C/liver disease journey. I feel fortune to be a member of such a great community of caring people.
Hector
4/23/2013
UCSF liver cancer patient, undetectable HCV for 32 weeks, cirrhosis and HCC
In liver transplantation, the Milan criteria are applied as a basis for selecting patients with cirrhosis and hepatocellular carcinoma (HCC) for liver transplantation. I am currently unable to be transplanted due to my liver cancer being outside the Milan criteria for transplant. This is because even if I had a transplant, I still would die from recurrence of HCC soon after transplant and it would be a poor use of a donor liver. My outcome wouldn't change and someone else might die because I received the donor liver that could have saved them and allowed them to live 10-20 years.
"It ain't over 'til it's over"
"Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't go to yours."
Yogi Berra - Philosopher and baseball great
Hector
4/23/2013
UCSF liver cancer patient, undetectable HCV for 32 weeks, cirrhosis and HCC
San Francisco, CA
I've been away, and now swooping in to read your post and the 60 or so replies, with your updates on your situation.
There's not much I can say that hasn't already been said. Your generous spirit will certainly live forever, and I pray that medicine, our prayers and the great spirit will bring you through this so that you can continue with your mission to teach, to support, to be a role model for us all. Whatever the outcome, you are surely an eternal being, and your love and light will always be present.
Joining with the others as we pray and hold the space for your healing. You are loved by so many, and I am one of those. Thank you for keeping us informed in the midst of these challenges, thinking of others, as always.
Warmly, with faith and hope,
Lapis
There's not much I can say that hasn't already been said. Your generous spirit will certainly live forever, and I pray that medicine, our prayers and the great spirit will bring you through this so that you can continue with your mission to teach, to support, to be a role model for us all. Whatever the outcome, you are surely an eternal being, and your love and light will always be present.
Joining with the others as we pray and hold the space for your healing. You are loved by so many, and I am one of those. Thank you for keeping us informed in the midst of these challenges, thinking of others, as always.
Warmly, with faith and hope,
Lapis
Praying for a miracle to come your way. If anyone deserves one, it is you!
Big hugs and kisses to you!
Jilly
Big hugs and kisses to you!
Jilly
Hector I hope I am reading your last post correct, meaning that the scans didn't show up any new cancer so it's believed to still be contained in the liver......... Which would mean your still up to bat and have not recieved the 3 strikes yet......... Guy I don't care how you get on base, even a walk would be good at this point, just get there....... Best to you.
There is nothing I could say that would not sound trite. You have touched my life, my friend, and as ceanathus says, I will carry that as long as I live. I don't know if this is the end or the beginning - that is beyond my knowledge. But of what I know, you are one of the greatest. Glow with pride, Hector
bean
bean
Hector, Hector, Hector...my friend, my hero, my inspiration, my guru. When I first came to this website you were the first to reach out to me and have always, and I mean always, been there for me to get me through fears and qualms and questions. I read your posts and have been following you on this thread waiting for good news.
As I sat here today with tears streaming down my face again I thought how selfish of me. But then I realized, no it's not. I would truly, truly miss you. You have become a friend. Think about you daily. Hector you are a warrior...you are the most positive person I know. I can't imagine not having you in my life.
There are miracles. I read that one book where it says God is just waiting to give you a miracle, you just have to ask. I have been doing that for the last two months and am driving my Doctor nuts...have gone from Meld 13-15 to 8. He is frazzled trying to figure it out along with other things getting better.
If anyone deserves a miracle it is you because so many depend upon you BUT also you deserve it....YOU Hector mi amigo...deserve to be illness free and enjoy the later years of your life. A road trip for FUN and laughs...you deserve it.
Hector....You know my plan is to get better, come to SF and pick you up and go on a coastal highway journey to visit some of our fellow posters....so I'll join your revolution Hector....remember I was at Woodstock and followed the Greatful Dead so I have been there....I told Advocate and OrphanedHawk that if I get through this I am going to be heard. I need someone like you who is already an advocate and medically intelligent to help. It's hard to say no to me in person...so Washington DC watch out...it is stupid that we are all having to go through this crap.
Keep Fighting Hector....Everyone is praying and believing for you. Our lives would be less with out YOU and we all know you wouldn't want that. Liked your song, Gene's poem and Cree said it well and so did everyone else. We are all sending you hoorah's...come on Hector....if anyone can beat the odds....it is YOU.
Love, Prayers, and Good Vibes coming to YOU. / Summer - (p.s. Let me know the meeting point for the revolution!)
As I sat here today with tears streaming down my face again I thought how selfish of me. But then I realized, no it's not. I would truly, truly miss you. You have become a friend. Think about you daily. Hector you are a warrior...you are the most positive person I know. I can't imagine not having you in my life.
There are miracles. I read that one book where it says God is just waiting to give you a miracle, you just have to ask. I have been doing that for the last two months and am driving my Doctor nuts...have gone from Meld 13-15 to 8. He is frazzled trying to figure it out along with other things getting better.
If anyone deserves a miracle it is you because so many depend upon you BUT also you deserve it....YOU Hector mi amigo...deserve to be illness free and enjoy the later years of your life. A road trip for FUN and laughs...you deserve it.
Hector....You know my plan is to get better, come to SF and pick you up and go on a coastal highway journey to visit some of our fellow posters....so I'll join your revolution Hector....remember I was at Woodstock and followed the Greatful Dead so I have been there....I told Advocate and OrphanedHawk that if I get through this I am going to be heard. I need someone like you who is already an advocate and medically intelligent to help. It's hard to say no to me in person...so Washington DC watch out...it is stupid that we are all having to go through this crap.
Keep Fighting Hector....Everyone is praying and believing for you. Our lives would be less with out YOU and we all know you wouldn't want that. Liked your song, Gene's poem and Cree said it well and so did everyone else. We are all sending you hoorah's...come on Hector....if anyone can beat the odds....it is YOU.
Love, Prayers, and Good Vibes coming to YOU. / Summer - (p.s. Let me know the meeting point for the revolution!)
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