Aa
I just found out
So, I'm new to this... I'm in a brand new relationship with my best friend. We've known each other over 12 (before either of us had children) and have been there through all the highs and lows. We had both been single at least 3 years before I given his thoughts of 'us' any thought. My greatest fear was losing my best friend.
So here we are (after getting through all the red tape of 'how to keep our friendship in a relationship') officially titled boyfriend and girlfriend. Two weeks into it we decided to go get tested. He completed a normal std panel and I requested all possible tests. So... Fast forward to the results. He tested negative for everything tested, and I tested positive for hsv1 and hsv2..... (It was a shock to me, I've never had any symptoms, sores, or outbreaks)
Truth is, he wasn't tested for hsv and now I'm going out of my mind! We both talked about our results, even called the doctor and spoke on speaker phone... He really is my best friend and I'm so in love with him. As silly as it may sound, I feel that he is my 'happily ever after'.
*But now what? Do I do the selfless thing and let him go?
I don't want to put him in the position where he has to break up with me because he can take it (it's a lot to deal with), but I don't want to lose him. I just want him to make a clear-minded decision.
*Do I wait for him to get test results for hsv?
He seems to think that everything will be fine and there will be no need for this convo if his results come back positive as well... The concern with that is, I don't want him to be positive, and if he is I doubt that he was infected by me.
*Am I supposed to be okay with him testing negative and continuing our relationship? What is the risk of passing it on to him? Like I said earlier this is all new to me, and all I really know about it is what I've researched myself. The doctors seem to act as if this diagnosis isn't that serious and either don't have the education to enlighten me or choose not to.
I'm feeling anger, depression, and confusion all at once. I just don't know anymore. I feel that I've finally found a safe, happy, healthy relationship and come to find out I'm toxic! What do I do.
He still wants to have children and we've had talked about marriage. Reality is, we don't know much about any of this. My doctors haven't spoken about treatment because I've never had an outbreak (to my knowledge). But I was told that if I did it wouldn't go unnoticed. Unfortunately, I don't doubt the diagnosis due to current knowledge of my ex fiancé's escapades throughout our 7 year relationship.
Please help me to calm my mind and give me the needed understanding of what it is to have hsv. Thank you in advance.
So here we are (after getting through all the red tape of 'how to keep our friendship in a relationship') officially titled boyfriend and girlfriend. Two weeks into it we decided to go get tested. He completed a normal std panel and I requested all possible tests. So... Fast forward to the results. He tested negative for everything tested, and I tested positive for hsv1 and hsv2..... (It was a shock to me, I've never had any symptoms, sores, or outbreaks)
Truth is, he wasn't tested for hsv and now I'm going out of my mind! We both talked about our results, even called the doctor and spoke on speaker phone... He really is my best friend and I'm so in love with him. As silly as it may sound, I feel that he is my 'happily ever after'.
*But now what? Do I do the selfless thing and let him go?
I don't want to put him in the position where he has to break up with me because he can take it (it's a lot to deal with), but I don't want to lose him. I just want him to make a clear-minded decision.
*Do I wait for him to get test results for hsv?
He seems to think that everything will be fine and there will be no need for this convo if his results come back positive as well... The concern with that is, I don't want him to be positive, and if he is I doubt that he was infected by me.
*Am I supposed to be okay with him testing negative and continuing our relationship? What is the risk of passing it on to him? Like I said earlier this is all new to me, and all I really know about it is what I've researched myself. The doctors seem to act as if this diagnosis isn't that serious and either don't have the education to enlighten me or choose not to.
I'm feeling anger, depression, and confusion all at once. I just don't know anymore. I feel that I've finally found a safe, happy, healthy relationship and come to find out I'm toxic! What do I do.
He still wants to have children and we've had talked about marriage. Reality is, we don't know much about any of this. My doctors haven't spoken about treatment because I've never had an outbreak (to my knowledge). But I was told that if I did it wouldn't go unnoticed. Unfortunately, I don't doubt the diagnosis due to current knowledge of my ex fiancé's escapades throughout our 7 year relationship.
Please help me to calm my mind and give me the needed understanding of what it is to have hsv. Thank you in advance.
The igG herpes select type speicific blood test where anything above 1.2 would be considered positive.
Thank you for your comments. Now what steps do I take... Next time I see my doctor what should I request specifically to verify a true diagnosing or correct result?
I am truly grateful for your input.
I am truly grateful for your input.
It sure does. We dont use IgM due to many false positives we only use the igG type specific. You really need to start over with testing with a company knowlegeable about herpes.
I had a blood test, ImG. I wasn't given any numbers. We went into urgent care to get tests done, so I never even received my results in writing. Does the test itself make a difference? If so, should I retest?
Any insight what to do relationship wise?
Any insight what to do relationship wise?
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Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
