mental confusion

[mahtash]

My son is 26 years old , and within  past year I  noticed he posts very disturbing picture of himself in face book, and when I ask him what is it with these pictures, he tells me nothing it is funny, I am really worried about him. He is in life crises, recently quitted Med school, and wants to do design. I think he is confuse, but could these be a sign of mental problem?

[Peter Forster]

I think that it is important to be honest in what you say to your son. But the trick is figuring out how much to say and when to not say anything. I guess my advice would be this - try a very gentle version of what you want to say and then, if he seems to be listening, you can go on, but if he is getting upset then you should move on to another subject or "agree to disagree" by saying that you love him no matter what, even if you don't necessarily understand his decisions.
Another thing to pay attention to is saying things that are positive... look for things about him in his current life that you can be honestly positive about. People always find it easier to listen if what they are hearing is not just criticism or doubt.
Good luck!

[Peter Forster]

Thank you for writing.

From what you wrote I really can't answer the question. It could be a sign of a mental problem, on the other hand what you describe could equally easily be the typical turbulence of young adulthood - searching for a direction for life that makes sense to him.

I encourage you to try to understand his perspectives on these changes. One of the most important things that we can do as parents is to continually reassure our children that we are interested in how they see the world, even if it is different from how we see it. Maintaining an open dialog right now is probably one of the most important things you can do, in part because that is the only way of really understanding whether this is the natural rebellion of early adulthood or something else.

[mahtash]

Thanks a million for great advice, can you refer me to a Dr, in DC area? You are one of the type.

Best Regard,
Mahtash

[mahtash]

Thank you very much for your wise advise, I am trying to keep the communication  open , and you are right, he is going to a big turbulences in his life and I just want him to come out of it safe without destroying him self. It is hard not to comment on some of his behavior and where he is wrong in certain decision but of course he does not like it and think I am criticizing him even I just want him to think about it and by end of day he is the one to do what he wants to do.  Please let me know if I should continue bring up some opinion about his friend or what I think is not right. I am just worry about his mental stability and want him to be happy