Has MS Changed Your Mood, Thinking, etc.?

[yorkieville]

I have noticed that I feel very different. I am over-sensitive, don't 'think' the same, tend to 'react',  get irritated more easily.

Has anyone else oberserved these changes in themselves?

Often, I get upset, but I don't know why.....until later.

Sheila

[ghost39]

Hi yes I too cry and don't know why more often than not. I can get very angry/irrational and easily annoyed. I'm not good with stress anymore and actually think I have changed immensely, its quite upsetting.

[immisceo]

I was dealing with depression and mood disorders for years before I had any physical issues, so I never know what to attribute to MS as far as mental health goes. But any time I feel a bit out of sorts with my mood or emotions I try and make use of whatever resources are out there whether it's mindfulness exercises, medication, counselling. Actually being on here is a positive step for me too!

If you think it may be something more substantial than the usual ebbs and flows of mood, you may want to see if this rings any bells. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pseudobulbar_affect
Pseudobulbar affect (also uses the charming name of emotional incontinence) occurs with a small percentage of people MS and has approved treatment.

I should say though that this is also associated more with disproportionate or inappropriate reactions with any emotions, by which I mean it could manifest as laughing at something that's not funny as well.

[yorkieville]

I am the same way-cry so much more easily, get angry/irrational, easily annoyed.

And I can't deal with any kind of stress.

Whereas, I was always calm, easy-going, and the one everyone came to with their problems.

I don't like the new me. (:

[yorkieville]

When you were diagnosed, was your MS Doc able to ascertain from talking with you about symptoms, approx. how long you'd had MS, before you were diagnosed?

When I was finally diagnosed in 11/11-my MS Specialist talked with my husband and I, and she determined from my symptoms, that I had my 1st major MS exacerbation in 1998.

I agree-being a member of this forum has been a huge help to me.

I was gone awhile. When I lost my 1st Yorkie in 2011-I went into a deep depression.

I lost my 2nd sweet girl, two years to the date of my 1st one.

They were my children, so I am back in that depression.

But I am trying hard to come in here.

I'll check out the link.

Hmm.....no, I don't laugh at anything that isn't funny.

[ghost39]

I understand. I am still kind and want to help everyone like I used to but can't as I do not have the same patience and just cry so so easily. I don't really like me much anymore either. I used to be do much fun, laughing all the time, now I cry for no reason and go from being happy to upset or irrational in a heart beat. Its hard to cope isn't it, when you can't control it or understand why.

[yorkieville]

I'm so sorry that you are feeling this way, too.
I agree, it is very hard to cope with it. I hate the way I 'react', and then, later, realize why I was upset.
My husband is a very patient man, but even he lost it with me, a few days ago.

[ghost39]

It is hard for our husbands too. Sometimes I look back after and then feel guilty, but its not my fault or anyones fault. I'm sorry that you and your husband have suffered lately and am thinking of you :)

[yorkieville]

I agree. I feel it is very hard on our husbands. I know, that it hurts my husband, to see me in so much pain. I have horrendous nerve pain in my spine.

So, I feel guilty when I get upset and take it out on him.

Thank you-our hearts are broken, losing both of our sweet girls. For 17 years, they were our lives, and the house is so quiet and empty without them.

It's hard, because he has so much to do around the house, and they were my constant companions.

[supermum_ms]

I'm actually the opposite, i've always been very calm and tolerant and because i've always laughed a lot, i'd of said i was content and happy but after my big bang of 09, i've become even more so. I laugh a lot more than ever before, I appreciate all the little things and i know that sounds corny but its true.

I'm an optimist, and negative thoughts are not something i've really had to deal with at any time through out my life, i've just always seen the positive in everything, so even when everything goes bad again and i'm battling to get out of it, you'll find me laughing and telling jokes.

I've definitely had too many over the top giggling episodes to count, i'd like to think it's personality but I suspect its got more to do with where the lesions are in my brain lol. The constant feeling that time is running out, is also probably driving this to some degree, and i don't mean it in a morbid sense but more........appreciate what you have today, because you don't know if you'll get to keep it.

Depression is a beast to get out of if it takes hold, don't battle this beast alone, speak up, speak loud and do it sooner rather than later!

Hugs.........JJ

[yorkieville]

That's really great.

No, it doesn't sound corny, at all.

As far as depression, I'm going through the grieving process. And it is a process that takes time.

Sheila

[Jacksmom516]

Yes I have found myself to be very emotional at times.  Can cry at the drop of a hat.  while I have more patience with myself I do not have any patience with others!  

Stress is a huge part of my life and I think that is a factor -  I was off this weekend -  the first one since February and the last till August and found myself in a much better mood, even though I worked around the house harder than I do at my job.  Also found that my legs are  in better shape today and walking is much easier -  Oh to be able to quit the part time job and only work 5 days a week!  SIGH!

Tracy

[yorkieville]

Tracy,

I feel the same way-very little patience. And I am very emotional.

Stress is also a very huge part of my life, and I agree, it is a factor. You work a lot of hours. So, that makes it even harder.

Sheila

[s251]

Well my doctor is blaming my stress for the lesions... I know that stress can worsens MS but I dont think it can cause lesions :(

i am on the verge of giving up .. i dont want to know whats wrong anymore :(

[yorkieville]

I have MS "without visible lesions", so I can't address stress related to lesions, but  we all have stress in our lives.....some of us, more than others.
And I feel your doctor isn't taking you seriously.

And I agree with you, stress does worsen MS.

I've had MS exacerbations after stress.

When I told my MS Specialist in February, that I was depressed, felt overwhelmed, she offered me a prescription for an anti-depressant, and as she wrote the 'script, she smiled and said, "And your problems are bigger than everyone else's?"

I feel the same way.....like giving up. I developed Lymphocytic colitis, I'm down to 74#s, and my MS Lifelines nurse came out a few weeks ago, and I have limited areas of fat that I am allowed to inject.

So, I have two weeks left of the new Rebidose injector, and I don't know if I will continue. I told Accredo to put my refills on hold, until I see my MS Specialist at the end of June.

I think I'm sorry I was ever diagnosed.

[jen673]

I too feel like I over react when everything isn't perfecto at home.  I have 3 kids ages 14, 11, and 9.  So that can be stressful! Lol. And yes....our poor husbands take a brunt at times.  I really wish I could be more like you JJ!  I try my best to. I think positively but just get angry or worry very easily.  

I taked with the neuro about this wondering if I should ake an antidepressant to help calm me down some.  I'm afraid all this stress I put on myself is causing my MS to worsen.  I ant be good :(. I just don't want to have to take the medicine because I know I'm not depressed...just a little OCD. Lol

This disease bites and hate that my family has to suffer too.

Jeny

[yorkieville]

Jeny,

Thank you for responding to my question. I wondered if I was the only one.

I used to be like JJ-but too much has happened since my diagnosis. I live in constant nerve pain. I can't leave the house. And now, with the latest diagnosis of Lymphocytic colitis, and the fact that it is chronic, it's hard to feel upbeat.

I don't want an anti-depressant, because I already take too many medications.

I agree-MS really does bite. It's very hard on families.

Sheila

[jen673]

I'm sorry you are struggling.  Don't be afraid to reach out to friends and family.  Maybe they can help get you out .  Just being out with friends can do wonders!  Don't let this MS get you down.  We are strong and this disease is a roller coaster.  I'm sure you will get better again!  You can vent anytime.....we are your friends too :)

))HUGS((
Jeny

[Lulu54]

please check your settings on messages. I tried to respond to your pm but it rejected my words, saying you aren't accepting messages.  :-(

If  can be hard on our partners because they want to fix us, not so much that our being short is what gets to them.  I do find at times I am less toelrant than others - perhaps I often feel like I am wasting time while the clock is ticking.  

Laura

[yorkieville]

Hi, Laura.

Thanks. I didn't realize I hadn't checked accept messages.

I agree, it is hard on our partners. I know Rich hates to see me in so much pain. But, he also loses patience with me, lately, because I am "reacting" to things. I'm working on thinking through what is bothering me, so that I can avoid reacting.

I feel, like life is going on without me. I hate it. I used to be so active, and now, the nerve pain is so bad, that I am forced to spend my life, laying down.

Sheila

[yorkieville]

Thank you, Jeny. Afraid I don't have any family. And I can't get out with friends right now. Hopefully, when this Lymphocytic colitis is put into remission, I will be able to go out again.

The MS hasn't really gotten me down. I was actually very thankful to get my diagnosis. It took 6 long years, and my MS Specialist was able to determine, from my symptoms, that I'd actually had MS since at least, '98.

Right now, what is getting me down, is that I developed Lymphocytic colitis, and it is making the nerve pain in my spine, unbearable.

I've lost weight again-back down to 74#s, so I have only a few areas left to do my Rebif injections.

I'm very thankful for my friends in this forum.

It seems like only people coping with illness, really understand.

(((HUGS)))
  Sheila

[supermum_ms]

Here's where I becoming a pain in the b-hind, to me stress is a generic term, it means different things to different people, and what one person finds stressful another will thrive on. Life in general has been dissected and analysed and just like 'fatigue' is over used by everyone and their pet hamster, well to me so is 'stress' over used.

Why is it stress and not being 'understandably' overwhelmed by a nasty personal bucket load of reality. If your personal bucket is already full, well it makes sense that the next little thing will make it over flow. Lets not forget about having a chronic medical condition, that makes the responsibilities of normal life just that much harder to do.

I do not see many aspects of life as stressful, that's just the way it is, its just life! I must be one of the people that thrives on chaos, because I dont get it, i honestly do not understand why people blame outside elements and not the internal.

To outsiders looking into my life, I'm the daughter of a elderly mother with bipolar, sister of 2 brothers with Asperger's, the mother of two very different kids, my son is a scarily gifted teen and an Aspie, my daughter is very successful in her chosen field, struggled academically and is also an Aspie. I've always worked in pressure cooker environments, and loved ever moment i volunteered or worked in schools helping kids with special needs and behavioural issues.

People automatically assume my life must be a stress-fest nightmare, dysfunctional family etc etc but it so isn't anything like that, it never has been but people assume my life has to be an emotional roller coaster and unbelievably stressful because of the family I have and I just don't get why. Seriously, if i had a dollar for every time someone said to me "I don't know how you do it?!" and its never said with anything other than confused pitty, lol its been said a thousand times and it still shocks the hell out of me.      

I really dont know if we should be blaming the external aspects of life and putting into the stress box, when the other alternative is the internal you, what your medically dealing with and what's going on inside your head space because of it. Are we sometimes just being too hard on our selves, doing to much, expecting too much etc........when our buckets are full?

HUGS...........JJ  

ps if you didn't already know it, i sometimes ramble on and on and on :o)    

[yorkieville]

Well, let's see....

I have P.T. in Nov. & Dec. Tech told me it was covered 2 treatments a week for 6 weeks. Didn't tell me that I couldn't make up missed treatments due to tests, doctor appts. until the 7th treatment.

Treatment was inconsistent, because she had another Tech do my treatments, and didn't show her how she was doing my treatments, so, on those days-no benefit from the treatment.

Hospital billing dept. mis-filed 15 claims, dating back to Sept. '12.

They admitted they filed my therapy with the wrong place. When they filed it with the correct place, it turns out that it "is out of network", so.....we are getting hit with a huge medical bill, that we simply can't afford.

"In network" my P.T would have been 100% covered.

Billing supervisor said it doesn't matter that my Tech told me my P.T. was covered.

Two weeks ago, they began refiling claims that had already been filed, and paid.

Billing supervisors response was "Someone got over-zealous".

Now, they are submitting claims for things I didn't even have done. Billing supervisors response? "We submit it as it is coded".

They are now filing more claims with the wrong place.

My husband is retired, we live on a fixed income.

So, this is STRESSFUL on both of us.

There is stress in life, and to suggest that we are blaming external aspects of life and putting it into the stress box is demeaning to anyone that states they feel overwhelmed, stressed.

[jen673]

MS is different to everyone and with that said, I believe everyone's ability to handle stress is different too.  We are all unique individuals.  What's important is that we do our best with what we are dealt and pray that each and every day holds new promises for us.  

It's great that you can handle stress JJ.......wish I was designed to never over react or be stressed.  It would be like hitting the lottery for me if so!   For the majority of us some things will just get to us and that's ok.....it's life right?  We will deal with it and hopefully overcome it!

Jeny

[yorkieville]

Jeny,

You've stated that very well. MS affects each of us differently.

For years, I was an Extraordinary Minister of the Eucharist. Served at weekday morning masses, 3 days a week, & two masses on Sundays

Scheduled the Altar Servers, Lectors, etc. Held Communion Services, when my former Pastor was away, and being a Missionary Priest, he was away, most of the summers.

I was in the Sacristy by 7:15 every morning.

I served at more funerals than I want to remember.

I worked all of the Funeral Luncheons at our church. Spending 6-8 hours on my feet. Worked our church's Fish Fry, every Friday in Lent, and the 1st Friday of every month.

I buried both my parents, my Dad in '97 & my Mom, 9 months later, in '98, after years of serious illesses.

I thank God I was still healthy enough to take care of them.

Today, my MS has progressed to the point, that I no longer am able to leave the house, and getting ready for doctor appts. causes me so much nerve pain, that my husband has to use a Homopedic massager on my spine, tush, thighs, just so that I can get in the car.

Yes, it's life. And it's ok if we have days when we just can't deal with the stress that life throws at us.

And until we walk in anothers shoes, it's impossible to understand, how their MS has affected them.

Sheila