Has MS Changed Your Mood, Thinking, etc.?

[yorkieville]

I have noticed that I feel very different. I am over-sensitive, don't 'think' the same, tend to 'react',  get irritated more easily.

Has anyone else oberserved these changes in themselves?

Often, I get upset, but I don't know why.....until later.

Sheila

[jen673]

I understand what you a saying.  I too sometimes don't express in words what I actually want to say!  Also when we write or text communication can be interpreted very differently than it was intended.   Don't let this get you down.   I'd say this is just an example how MS affects others.  

((HUGS))
Jeny

[supermum_ms]

Thank you poppy, I cant tell you how much i needed someone to reach out to me with some snippet of support and understanding! Thank you!

Today I wept with the sadness of knowing I have no choice but to accept I am loosing the ability to connect to others, take away my ability to speak, to write and i'm but a shell of what i am inside, an observer and not as i want and need to be. I am kicking and screaming and hanging on with my teeth gritted because it is the one thing, the only thing I can't cope with, isolation isn't where I can go, yet I am and I can't stop it, it just is and I have no choice but to accept and it su_cks beyond words!

I need a bigger bucket!

Look after your selves...........JJ

[Poppy7402]

Don't sweat it JJ, it's very difficult, if not impossible to always word things in a way that people will take exactly the meaning you are trying to give something, as everyone has very different "frames of reference".

Anyway, back to the topic at hand.

I think how MS impacts someone's mood/thinking etc can sometimes depend on where in the MS journey they are currently sitting.  How I see things versus someone who has had it years will most probably be very different.

As for my mood, being relatively newly diagnosed, I'm still at the feeling really ripped off stage and my mood/thinking, at times, very much reflects this.  I still can't quite believe this has landed in my lap and it's now my 'new' reality.  

Since this horrible thing reared it's head I've noticed that I am much quicker to get angry and have far less tolerance than I used to have.   It doesn't seem to matter how hard I try to stay calm, it just doesn't happen.  Maybe with a bit more time things will improve??

Poppy

[supermum_ms]

Um sigh, shocked at the reaction and I can only assume that I have "again" not been communicating very well. I have visual/cognitive/communication issues, that can make expressing my self difficult both verbally or in written form. I do try very hard to catch it, I spent hours (late last night) writing and re-writing because I knew it wasn't coming out quite right.......I should not assume people will always keep in mind who I am and remember the communication issues I deal with. My problems not yours, my fault not yours, my responsibility not yours!

My intention was to be supportive (!!) but at the same time empathetically thought provoking, I still see that in what I wrote, so I feel both confused and saddened that i've been interpreted in any negative way.

" 'understandably' overwhelmed by a nasty personal bucket load of reality. If your personal bucket is already full, well it makes sense that the next little thing will make it over flow. Lets not forget about having a chronic medical condition, that makes the responsibilities of normal life just that much harder to do. "

"........alternative is the internal you, what your medically dealing with and what's going on inside your head space because of it. Are we sometimes just being too hard on our selves, doing to much, expecting too much etc........when our buckets are full?"

I wasn't intending to imply that I was different (?) because I'm definitely not, I don't think i react to stress any differently to anyone else. Its just that what I find stressful, you might not - what you find stressful, I might not!

I know what makes me feel stress, in those moments I am calm, some say i'm too calm because all my emotions are 'absent', I think its more from learned self protection. With each additional 'moment' my personal bucket of reality keeps on steadily filling, and when it over flows, I like anyone else 'understandably' fall apart.

I am sorry if i've given anyone a negative impression than what i thought, never my intent and not how I am but its time to take a break before my reality intrudes on others once again.

Take care of your selves........JJ

[yorkieville]

Jeny,

You've stated that very well. MS affects each of us differently.

For years, I was an Extraordinary Minister of the Eucharist. Served at weekday morning masses, 3 days a week, & two masses on Sundays

Scheduled the Altar Servers, Lectors, etc. Held Communion Services, when my former Pastor was away, and being a Missionary Priest, he was away, most of the summers.

I was in the Sacristy by 7:15 every morning.

I served at more funerals than I want to remember.

I worked all of the Funeral Luncheons at our church. Spending 6-8 hours on my feet. Worked our church's Fish Fry, every Friday in Lent, and the 1st Friday of every month.

I buried both my parents, my Dad in '97 & my Mom, 9 months later, in '98, after years of serious illesses.

I thank God I was still healthy enough to take care of them.

Today, my MS has progressed to the point, that I no longer am able to leave the house, and getting ready for doctor appts. causes me so much nerve pain, that my husband has to use a Homopedic massager on my spine, tush, thighs, just so that I can get in the car.

Yes, it's life. And it's ok if we have days when we just can't deal with the stress that life throws at us.

And until we walk in anothers shoes, it's impossible to understand, how their MS has affected them.

Sheila

[jen673]

MS is different to everyone and with that said, I believe everyone's ability to handle stress is different too.  We are all unique individuals.  What's important is that we do our best with what we are dealt and pray that each and every day holds new promises for us.  

It's great that you can handle stress JJ.......wish I was designed to never over react or be stressed.  It would be like hitting the lottery for me if so!   For the majority of us some things will just get to us and that's ok.....it's life right?  We will deal with it and hopefully overcome it!

Jeny