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Mental Health Check
This weekend marks the first anniversary of the death of my dear neighbor, who was killed by a gunshot from her own son. He was found not guilty by reason of insanity (paranoid schizophrenic), and will spend the majority if not all of his adult life in a mental hospital.
I have watched her husband, our neighbor and friend, struggle for the past year, mourning the loss of his soulmate, while fighting to get the best outcome possible for his son. They had tried desperately to get him help, but he was always able to bluff his way through the system. Now he can’t hide anymore and is forced to take his meds and attend treatment.
People with mental illness are often times very smart and almost always are able to manipulate everyone around them.
Sometimes the people who are close to them are hesitant to speak up and recommend treatment, even though they know the person is very ill, for fear of offending them or even for fear for their own personal well being.
Mental illness takes on all forms – but just like we know when our body is not right, we also can tune in and listen to others and know when something is not mentally right.
Please take the time to listen, and reach out to those you know who need some extra help.
For Julie,
Laura
I have watched her husband, our neighbor and friend, struggle for the past year, mourning the loss of his soulmate, while fighting to get the best outcome possible for his son. They had tried desperately to get him help, but he was always able to bluff his way through the system. Now he can’t hide anymore and is forced to take his meds and attend treatment.
People with mental illness are often times very smart and almost always are able to manipulate everyone around them.
Sometimes the people who are close to them are hesitant to speak up and recommend treatment, even though they know the person is very ill, for fear of offending them or even for fear for their own personal well being.
Mental illness takes on all forms – but just like we know when our body is not right, we also can tune in and listen to others and know when something is not mentally right.
Please take the time to listen, and reach out to those you know who need some extra help.
For Julie,
Laura
Then there are those that fake mental illness and get away with murder. I am spirit mother to a son whose father killed his mother. There was nothing mentally ill about this man. He was a controlling selfish bas*ard. We have managed to keep him locked in a mental institution but he may soon be released. If you watched the PTSD that my son suffered. If you had watched the years of his face with emotions blank. If you had watched...you would believe in the death penalty. It was soul murder for my spirit son and nothing less.
Today, 20 years later, my son is married and expecting his first child (a SON!!). He has finally able to form relationships. It is no longer my children calling him to keep in touch. He is now calling THEM! Had you watched, you would never have thought my spirit son would able to ever trust or have a relationship.
Let's just be sure it is mental illness and not evil at play. It sickens me that so many play the "mental illness" and I am not responsible card.
Today, 20 years later, my son is married and expecting his first child (a SON!!). He has finally able to form relationships. It is no longer my children calling him to keep in touch. He is now calling THEM! Had you watched, you would never have thought my spirit son would able to ever trust or have a relationship.
Let's just be sure it is mental illness and not evil at play. It sickens me that so many play the "mental illness" and I am not responsible card.
I have a real-life nightmare story that I need to get off of my chest. I have been living with this having not told many except my husband and a couple of family members and one friend on this forum.
When I was in Europe this summer visiting our father, we found out that my half- brother had died on the day I arrived in Italy July 1 (yes, it was no coincidence that I was there with my father). The gut-wrenching news came through an email because the distance and lack of access to telephone numbers. The note stated that my brother passed away--my beautiful 6'4", muscular, young, red-headed, brother with whom I've not had the pleasure of knowing (long story) had died. The email listed a telephone number, and I called my half-sister for the first time.
I discovered that the original autopsy report indicated probable overdose. My sister said that there was no way he would have killed himself, but he lived with incredible back pain from a sport injury. After days of talking long distance, we concluded that it was probably an accident or that he suffered from sleep apnea from breathing too shallow as the result of the medicine for his back pain.
I didn't grow up with my brother, so I felt that it was my Christian duty to console my father and stay strong. I couldn't cry and had to console my sister long distance on the telephone. I even talked with her family (unrelated to me) to console them. I held my father and consoled him for month remaining in Europe. I kept my emotions buried even on the way back on the plane, and when I started back to work.
A couple of days ago, I finally was able to call my sister because I felt that I was strong enough to talk with her. I learned that my brother was found with 11 patches of pain medicine on his body. The coroner determined that he probably died within 5 mintues. To my dismay, I learned that he must have died by his own hands. This couldn't be the result of an accident. My sister still says that there's no way that he would ever kill himself and never appeared to be depressed, other than being completely tired of the constant pain. She denies that this was suicide, but reason can only conclude otherwise. Why would someone have 11 patches on their body?
Now I'm going through the steps of the grieving process, and I've only met him when he was a young teen! I am definitely in the anger stage as I would have loved to have known him, for I understand he was such a sweet and caring person! Because he had a very common name, I searched the internet for years, and tried so hard to find him but with no luck! Now, it's too late! I am also incredibly sad.
I'm trying to pull things together. I wake up angry and sad every day. I am putting one foot in front of the other and going to work. I deny any feelings while I'm at work or when I'm around others. I have not told anyone at work or any of my friends. I am telling people now because I think it's important as people with chronic pain to reach out and get help when we're losing hope. As the result of this, I am going to get myself to a psychiatrist for the first time ever.
My message to anyone who is in Limboland, diagnosed and in pain, or depressed is this: always, no matter hard, consider the people in your life. Get help if you need it! There's not the stigma there used to be, and there's lots of good medicines. If one professional can't help you, try another. Keep fighting for those that love you!
PS Please forgive the typos. My vision is not good at all! I'm also going to post on a seperate thread.
When I was in Europe this summer visiting our father, we found out that my half- brother had died on the day I arrived in Italy July 1 (yes, it was no coincidence that I was there with my father). The gut-wrenching news came through an email because the distance and lack of access to telephone numbers. The note stated that my brother passed away--my beautiful 6'4", muscular, young, red-headed, brother with whom I've not had the pleasure of knowing (long story) had died. The email listed a telephone number, and I called my half-sister for the first time.
I discovered that the original autopsy report indicated probable overdose. My sister said that there was no way he would have killed himself, but he lived with incredible back pain from a sport injury. After days of talking long distance, we concluded that it was probably an accident or that he suffered from sleep apnea from breathing too shallow as the result of the medicine for his back pain.
I didn't grow up with my brother, so I felt that it was my Christian duty to console my father and stay strong. I couldn't cry and had to console my sister long distance on the telephone. I even talked with her family (unrelated to me) to console them. I held my father and consoled him for month remaining in Europe. I kept my emotions buried even on the way back on the plane, and when I started back to work.
A couple of days ago, I finally was able to call my sister because I felt that I was strong enough to talk with her. I learned that my brother was found with 11 patches of pain medicine on his body. The coroner determined that he probably died within 5 mintues. To my dismay, I learned that he must have died by his own hands. This couldn't be the result of an accident. My sister still says that there's no way that he would ever kill himself and never appeared to be depressed, other than being completely tired of the constant pain. She denies that this was suicide, but reason can only conclude otherwise. Why would someone have 11 patches on their body?
Now I'm going through the steps of the grieving process, and I've only met him when he was a young teen! I am definitely in the anger stage as I would have loved to have known him, for I understand he was such a sweet and caring person! Because he had a very common name, I searched the internet for years, and tried so hard to find him but with no luck! Now, it's too late! I am also incredibly sad.
I'm trying to pull things together. I wake up angry and sad every day. I am putting one foot in front of the other and going to work. I deny any feelings while I'm at work or when I'm around others. I have not told anyone at work or any of my friends. I am telling people now because I think it's important as people with chronic pain to reach out and get help when we're losing hope. As the result of this, I am going to get myself to a psychiatrist for the first time ever.
My message to anyone who is in Limboland, diagnosed and in pain, or depressed is this: always, no matter hard, consider the people in your life. Get help if you need it! There's not the stigma there used to be, and there's lots of good medicines. If one professional can't help you, try another. Keep fighting for those that love you!
PS Please forgive the typos. My vision is not good at all! I'm also going to post on a seperate thread.
Just four short days after Julie's death, the sister of a dear friend jumped from a highway overpass into six lanes of traffic. She had methodically planned her death, leaving behind notes and several weeks of clues that none of her family had picked up on until after she was gone.
She had decided that the bi-polar meds weren't for her, and had stopped taking them.
Both of these families struggle every day in trying to make sense of the effects of mental illness. It is always a tought day for them living with these memories, but this week will be especially difficult.
for Angie, too
Lu
She had decided that the bi-polar meds weren't for her, and had stopped taking them.
Both of these families struggle every day in trying to make sense of the effects of mental illness. It is always a tought day for them living with these memories, but this week will be especially difficult.
for Angie, too
Lu
I remember when this happened and can't believe it has already been a year.
My family has also been touched by mental illness and believe me it it one of the hardest things to see a relative go through. It affects each and every member of the family as well.
I hope and pray that this young man will get in or stay in a program while institutionalized that will help him, not make things worse.
The one year anniversay is really tough. I hope all of you who know the family are also able to find peace with all that happened a year ago.
Julie
My family has also been touched by mental illness and believe me it it one of the hardest things to see a relative go through. It affects each and every member of the family as well.
I hope and pray that this young man will get in or stay in a program while institutionalized that will help him, not make things worse.
The one year anniversay is really tough. I hope all of you who know the family are also able to find peace with all that happened a year ago.
Julie
Thank you for bringing up this most important topic. As a society, we absolutely have to get rid of the taboo of hiding mental illness and other diseases that affect the brain.
Education is key to helping people understand how truly devastating mental illness can be, for the afflicted individual, the family and others close to them.
My 18 year old nephew committed suicide this past spring. He was diagnosed as bipolar and had 2 previous serious attempts at suicide within the year preceding his death.. He had stopped taking his meds and went into that dark place, an abyss most people cannot truly understand. After his death, his journal was found and read; it became apparent that he had been planning to take his life for several months and carefully plotted out the sequence of events.
While epilepsy is not considered a mental illness, it does have something in common with mental illnesses. That is, the meds that are prescribed are often intolerable to the patients, who are often of high intelligence and the drugs fog their brains. While they don't like their sx, the side effects of the drugs are the greater of two evils for them.
Once off medication, which happens all too often, the tragedies occur, with young lives being lost far too early. I know, because I have seen it first hand too many times now.
Its time to get this out of the shadows and into the mainstream. If anyone knows of good advocacy groups, I'd appreciate the links so that I can make my voice heard on this very important topic.
Audrey
Education is key to helping people understand how truly devastating mental illness can be, for the afflicted individual, the family and others close to them.
My 18 year old nephew committed suicide this past spring. He was diagnosed as bipolar and had 2 previous serious attempts at suicide within the year preceding his death.. He had stopped taking his meds and went into that dark place, an abyss most people cannot truly understand. After his death, his journal was found and read; it became apparent that he had been planning to take his life for several months and carefully plotted out the sequence of events.
While epilepsy is not considered a mental illness, it does have something in common with mental illnesses. That is, the meds that are prescribed are often intolerable to the patients, who are often of high intelligence and the drugs fog their brains. While they don't like their sx, the side effects of the drugs are the greater of two evils for them.
Once off medication, which happens all too often, the tragedies occur, with young lives being lost far too early. I know, because I have seen it first hand too many times now.
Its time to get this out of the shadows and into the mainstream. If anyone knows of good advocacy groups, I'd appreciate the links so that I can make my voice heard on this very important topic.
Audrey
Is is so true what you have wrote.
My family is touch by mental illness on my mother's side of the family. Most of our relatives have suffered with manic depressive paranoid schizophrenia. Most ended their own lives. My grandmother was DX with it, & so was my uncle. My grandmother attempted suicide several times but never died from her actions...but my great grandmother & uncle did succeed.
My uncle was a great burly biker man. 10ft. tall and bullet proof...at least to me. Most people would shutter when they would see him. He was honest..maybe too honest. If he didn't like you, he told you that. I loved him dearly.
When he had his first mental break, it was heart breaking to say the least. He was no longer himself. He told us one time that his delusions were like the best drugs you could possibly be on, but there was no way to distinguish what was real or fake. He would tell us that people were following him & to call the FBI.
When my aunt would tell his doctor about his strange actions..they would go by his word. He always knew what to say. He would say everything was fine..there's nothing new to report. My mother was beside herself because she knew what this meant if the doctors didn't start listening. She had already lived through this once before, through my grandmother...dodging butcher knifes as a child..watching my grandmother go through her mental breaks. She knew someone was either going to get hurt or hurt themselves.
Well, the doctors didn't listen. He continued on the meds that weren't working evidently & he took his own life. The system failed him & our family. Mom said that the system was much better when Dayton State existed, but now since they are gone, nobody listens.
Most of my experience with mental illness is a combo of things. The denial of it being there and the disregard from the doctors who treat. I've seen happen several times.
I guess the doctors haven't figured that part out yet..that sometimes people lie and say everything is good when it's not.
My family is touch by mental illness on my mother's side of the family. Most of our relatives have suffered with manic depressive paranoid schizophrenia. Most ended their own lives. My grandmother was DX with it, & so was my uncle. My grandmother attempted suicide several times but never died from her actions...but my great grandmother & uncle did succeed.
My uncle was a great burly biker man. 10ft. tall and bullet proof...at least to me. Most people would shutter when they would see him. He was honest..maybe too honest. If he didn't like you, he told you that. I loved him dearly.
When he had his first mental break, it was heart breaking to say the least. He was no longer himself. He told us one time that his delusions were like the best drugs you could possibly be on, but there was no way to distinguish what was real or fake. He would tell us that people were following him & to call the FBI.
When my aunt would tell his doctor about his strange actions..they would go by his word. He always knew what to say. He would say everything was fine..there's nothing new to report. My mother was beside herself because she knew what this meant if the doctors didn't start listening. She had already lived through this once before, through my grandmother...dodging butcher knifes as a child..watching my grandmother go through her mental breaks. She knew someone was either going to get hurt or hurt themselves.
Well, the doctors didn't listen. He continued on the meds that weren't working evidently & he took his own life. The system failed him & our family. Mom said that the system was much better when Dayton State existed, but now since they are gone, nobody listens.
Most of my experience with mental illness is a combo of things. The denial of it being there and the disregard from the doctors who treat. I've seen happen several times.
I guess the doctors haven't figured that part out yet..that sometimes people lie and say everything is good when it's not.
Yes, this is a sad situation. I know the parents of a couple of young men who are disabled by schizophrenia. It often happens just as they are coming into their own, in the early 20s. It's such a shame, and their lives and talents are wasted.
One thing we can do is contribute to our local mental health associations.
ess
One thing we can do is contribute to our local mental health associations.
ess
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