Relapse?

[Deb61]

Would you consider an increase in cognitive problems a relapse?  I am experiencing some really bad problems.  I am also very busy going back to work and have not been getting enough sleep, though.  However, my auditory processing is probably working at 20% and my word recall is terrible.  I can hardly understand anyone talking to me or get the message of any short news segment.  Even short sentences that my husband speaks to me is completely lost in translation!  Especially when there's any other sound.  I do have hearing loss in both ears, too.  I can't afford hearing aids, as they are expensive and my insurance doesn't cover them.  These symptoms are invisible but are having a profound impact.  I do have some old symptoms that are creeping back in there.  I do have some pain in my right foot, spasticity, muscle spasms, tremor, and extreme fatigue--but these are old symptoms.  Could this be a relapse?

At work, I'm department chair and people come to see me with problems.  I have to admit to myself that I cannot comprehend most of what they are saying to me.  I'm starting to find myself nodding as though I'm understanding when I haven't understood a word.  I've come home with sticky notes covering my laptops and books and cannot make connections to what it was about (like it didn't exist).  

I know I need the sleep, but the whole reason I am staying up late is to get what I have to get done which would have normally taken only a fraction of the time to do.  Actually, I should be doing it now!  However, I know when I get to the task, I'll labor over the simplest of things.  So, it's like a vicious circle.  If I don't do the work, there's more for the next day.

I also feel like I'm in a fog, so I'm not really panicking.  It's a really odd feeling . . .  I know there's a problem, and I hadn't really thought about it until after a post I just responded to.  

Has anyone else had similar experiences, and give me some pointers?  Maybe increase my Provigil (my doctor said I can take the whole pill which I divide in half because it causes me to be jittery)?  I see my doctor in September (I forget the date).  I thought about giving up department chair and just teach, but my husband says to wait until after my doctor visit.  However, I'm looking like I'm incompetent at my job.  I have disclosed that I have MS, but I don't really feel like telling people that it's causing me not to think well (and I'm trying to teach kids to think well ????).

Sorry for the rambling, but I am extremely scatter-brained right now!  Any pointers are appreciated.  Oh, Terry (saveone) thank you for the website for the desktop sticky notes, I just downloaded it.  

Deb

[Eyesnlegs]

I don't know the answer to this either but have had many similar problems at work and was advised by my Occupational Health not to cut hours or change roles as it was up to them to help me continue in my job.

I have an upcoming appt. with a neuropsychologist who will assess me for any issues and help me 'rewire' too.

With this in mind I have just slowed down my usual instant reaction and people are now getting used to the new me who does not make instant decisions but measured ones and does not answer all questions immediately. I do not want to move from my role back to teaching as I think this would be worse for me a the moment.

So I don't know the answer to your question but I was as the neuropsych when I see her. Wishing you healing and restoring sleep.

Pat
x

[bambi61]

I have the same problem with cognitive skills anymore. I ask people to constantly repeat what they said. I tell my teenagers to slow down and say it slowly and still sometimes I can't understand them. Sometimes the tv is on and it sounds like a foreign language to me and I have to stop and really concentrate before I can start understanding what they are saying...I thought I was going nuts!

[sllowe]

Hey Deb,

I don't have any better advice that what was given, just wanted to say I feel your pain and your descript of 'lights on, and no one home' sums it up.

That delay in what use to be reactive and 2nd nature in thinking and processing is a killer to everything, including your spirits. Like what was said, the sleep deprivation makes it so much worse. Sure you are feeling glazed over and zombieish.

Wishing you some sleep and healing and time at work to get it all done w/out no-one being the wiser.

Thinking of you,
shell

[Deb61]

Thank you for getting back with me and your helpful suggestions.  I must get some sleep because it does complicate things.  

I see that I have my neuro appointment in two weeks, thankfully.  I will lay low at work and do the best I can until then.  Everyone knows I have MS, but they haven't a clue that MS can cause cognitive issues.  

The Charlie Brown Syndrome is exactly my problem.  This also fits-- "The lights are on, but no one is home."

I can't tell you how much I appreciate this forum.  Thanks again!  Deb

[essdipity]

If these cog symptoms are new, relatively speaking, then yes, I'd call that a relapse.

Thus far I haven't had brain fog, word recall, etc., knock on wood, except for the odd absent-mindedness here and there. Since I'm fast getting into the 'old' category, I'm aware of these things even regardless of MS, as most everyone my age is. So for you, I'm wondering if having a few incidents has made you hyper-conscious of your mental functioning, and maybe it's really not as bad as you think. I hope that's it. That and a very real hearing problem. It's enough to scare anyone.

I do understand your Catch-22 about not getting enough sleep. That sort of thing feeds on itself. The only suggestion I can come up with is to pare down your activities and obligations to the bare minimum. Let your family do more of the essentials, and help you with the ones only you can do. It's not forever, only till you get this thing figured out. Make yourself a schedule that includes a firm, early bedtime and stick to it. Everything will fall into place, I guarantee it.

Look up when your next neuro appt. is. If it's within a few weeks, hold off making any big job decisions till after that. I'm sure you have an excellent reputation at work, so you can ride on that while you face this situation short-term.

Hang in there, Deb.

ess

[saveone]

Deb I have many of the same problems as do many others on here.  It is a topic that comes up often.  If you look at my last journal entry it is "What I forget".  I started writing and forgot everything so I just rambled hoping it would come back.  it didn't.

I am seeing a speech/language pathologist for cognitive training.  I was not aware until I went for a speech/swallowing eval that practiced cog training.  I see her twice on week on good weeks.  It is mostly about trying to force the brain to rewire itself ans some compensatory planning. I am not even sure if planning is the right word but it is close :)

If you need someone to talk to or if you would like to discuss some of the things I have learned I am more than willing to talk with you.  Just send me a pm and tell me what areas are effecting you the most.  The thing about not hearing/translating what is being said to you is also common.  The only thing I know to do with that is ask them to repeat themselves.  We have discussed this here as the Charlie Brown Syndrome.  Wah Wah Wah like his teacher.

And I am glad you like the sticky notes.  I do too.  I also like the vueminder calendar.  Hang in there, terry