Aa
Emetophobia & Contamination OCD- having such a hard time eating
Hi everyone,
I haven't been on here before so I'm not sure how it works I was just looking for some support, maybe someone who has been through a similar struggle. I have suffered on and off with varying degrees of OCD, germaphobia, and emetophobia my entire life. I am 21 now and am in a very bad spell with my disorder, my entire life is focused on avoiding getting a stomach illness, I am absolutely terrified. I have rarely thrown up in my life and have never had a stomach flu, which makes me even more scared. Avoiding any possibility of contracting an illness controls my life- I eat very specific foods I consider safe, I worry for hours if I ever eat at restaraunts, I don't touch any of my food with bare hands and prepare it with gloves. I also don't drink alcohol and wash my hands obsessively. At least once a day I am overcome with anxiety and truly believe I will throw up- I am nauseous, hot and cold, stomach cramps, etc. for a period everyday... Sometimes all day. I have always been skinny but lately eating has become a huge problem- I feel like it is such a difficult task and I feel like I am running a marathon when I put food in front of me- i constantly think "I am a quarter way done, how do I feel" " I would be feeling sick by now of I was going to throw up" etc. Sometimes I can get theough a meal quickly and other times it takes hours of picking, all while pacing around the house preparing to vomit. I need help. I see a therapist every week and take 80mg of Prozac everyday. I feel like a hopeless case I absolutely hate that I am taking all this medicine and I still feel like this- I am not a huge fan of prescription meds. My life is so restricted right now- anyone with any advice about emetophobia, OCD, germaphobia or this eating problem I would so appreciate any help. Thanks ya'll! :)
Shannon
I haven't been on here before so I'm not sure how it works I was just looking for some support, maybe someone who has been through a similar struggle. I have suffered on and off with varying degrees of OCD, germaphobia, and emetophobia my entire life. I am 21 now and am in a very bad spell with my disorder, my entire life is focused on avoiding getting a stomach illness, I am absolutely terrified. I have rarely thrown up in my life and have never had a stomach flu, which makes me even more scared. Avoiding any possibility of contracting an illness controls my life- I eat very specific foods I consider safe, I worry for hours if I ever eat at restaraunts, I don't touch any of my food with bare hands and prepare it with gloves. I also don't drink alcohol and wash my hands obsessively. At least once a day I am overcome with anxiety and truly believe I will throw up- I am nauseous, hot and cold, stomach cramps, etc. for a period everyday... Sometimes all day. I have always been skinny but lately eating has become a huge problem- I feel like it is such a difficult task and I feel like I am running a marathon when I put food in front of me- i constantly think "I am a quarter way done, how do I feel" " I would be feeling sick by now of I was going to throw up" etc. Sometimes I can get theough a meal quickly and other times it takes hours of picking, all while pacing around the house preparing to vomit. I need help. I see a therapist every week and take 80mg of Prozac everyday. I feel like a hopeless case I absolutely hate that I am taking all this medicine and I still feel like this- I am not a huge fan of prescription meds. My life is so restricted right now- anyone with any advice about emetophobia, OCD, germaphobia or this eating problem I would so appreciate any help. Thanks ya'll! :)
Shannon
Hi Shannon,
Sorry to hear that your OCD is hitting you so hard. I actually had to look up "emetophobia" - had never heard of that before. Is the emetophobia the primary driver of your OCD right now? Is your biggest fear that you will throw up and the germaphobia is secondary?
You say you don't like taking meds, but they might be necessary right now just to get you settled down and your OCD at a lower level. Perhaps Prozac isn't the best drug for you. Everyone's body chemistry is different and people react differently to different drugs. Ask your doctor to try one of the other SSRI's - there's half a dozen of them out there right now. Sometimes you have to try a few before you find the one that works best for you.
Your best plan of action is to get your OCD under control and then work on the phobias. I think phobias are a by-product of OCD. Your mind is looking for something to obsess about, and its centering on emetophobia and germaphobia (which kind of go together). If it wasn't that, you might be obsessing about something else. Talk therapy like CBT would help to reduce your OCD, which is the primary cause of all this. Once you have all that under control, the eating problem will take care of itself. If your psychiatrist doesn't specialize in talk therapy and only wants to throw drugs at the problem, you may want to consult a psychologist.
Other things you can do are to meditate (or pray if you are religious), get daily vigorous exercise, get 8 hours of sleep a night, eat regular meals (I know this one is hard for you especially but starving yourself can increase your OCD - your brain doesn't run right without nutrients), keep occupied (its hard to worry if your brain is occupied) and be social - get out and be around people you like.
You want to try some self-therapy. There are several good self-help books out there. Two I like are "Worry" by Dr. Edward Halloran and "You Are Not Your Brain" by Dr. Jeffery Schwartz.
I don't fear throwing up but I do dislike intensely. Honestly, I would rather be punched directly in the face rather than throw up, so I try to avoid it too. But, I like everyone else on the planet eat a variety of things from different sources and I can't remember the last time I threw up. Oh wait, yes I do. It was 7 years ago when I was out sailing on a very choppy day - sea sick. Otherwise, for most humans, throwing up is a rare occurrence. Even for people who live in 3rd world countries where sanitation isn't great, throwing up is not a common occurrence. Your digestive system and stomach acid are pretty tough. And you have a fantastic thing called an immune system that does a great job of killing any pathogens that enter your body. Have greater faith in it.
It's ironic that one of the symptoms of anxiety is nausea and stomach upset, the very thing you are afraid of. I think if you can get the OCD to settle down a bit, you will feel physically better which will in turn lessen you OCD further.
Since you have germaphobia and wash your hands a lot, Google "zylast". It's a soap that was formulated to kill the Ebola virus and help stop the recent outbreak in West Africa. It kills just about every germ that is out there and more importantly, it has a residual effect of up to 6 hours. Unlike other soaps or hand sanitizers, use it and it will continue to protect you hours later, so it will lessen the desire to wash your hands. You will only feel the need to wash your hands if they are actually dirty, like most people. It also comes in a lotion that in addition to killing pathogens, does a great job of moisturizing your skin.
Hang in there, you can beat this. OCD is usually a lifetime condition, but you can learn to manage it and will have times when you don't feel it most of the time and just have an occasional flare-up.
"The Only Thing We Have To Fear Is Fear Itself"
- Franklin Delano Roosevelt
Sorry to hear that your OCD is hitting you so hard. I actually had to look up "emetophobia" - had never heard of that before. Is the emetophobia the primary driver of your OCD right now? Is your biggest fear that you will throw up and the germaphobia is secondary?
You say you don't like taking meds, but they might be necessary right now just to get you settled down and your OCD at a lower level. Perhaps Prozac isn't the best drug for you. Everyone's body chemistry is different and people react differently to different drugs. Ask your doctor to try one of the other SSRI's - there's half a dozen of them out there right now. Sometimes you have to try a few before you find the one that works best for you.
Your best plan of action is to get your OCD under control and then work on the phobias. I think phobias are a by-product of OCD. Your mind is looking for something to obsess about, and its centering on emetophobia and germaphobia (which kind of go together). If it wasn't that, you might be obsessing about something else. Talk therapy like CBT would help to reduce your OCD, which is the primary cause of all this. Once you have all that under control, the eating problem will take care of itself. If your psychiatrist doesn't specialize in talk therapy and only wants to throw drugs at the problem, you may want to consult a psychologist.
Other things you can do are to meditate (or pray if you are religious), get daily vigorous exercise, get 8 hours of sleep a night, eat regular meals (I know this one is hard for you especially but starving yourself can increase your OCD - your brain doesn't run right without nutrients), keep occupied (its hard to worry if your brain is occupied) and be social - get out and be around people you like.
You want to try some self-therapy. There are several good self-help books out there. Two I like are "Worry" by Dr. Edward Halloran and "You Are Not Your Brain" by Dr. Jeffery Schwartz.
I don't fear throwing up but I do dislike intensely. Honestly, I would rather be punched directly in the face rather than throw up, so I try to avoid it too. But, I like everyone else on the planet eat a variety of things from different sources and I can't remember the last time I threw up. Oh wait, yes I do. It was 7 years ago when I was out sailing on a very choppy day - sea sick. Otherwise, for most humans, throwing up is a rare occurrence. Even for people who live in 3rd world countries where sanitation isn't great, throwing up is not a common occurrence. Your digestive system and stomach acid are pretty tough. And you have a fantastic thing called an immune system that does a great job of killing any pathogens that enter your body. Have greater faith in it.
It's ironic that one of the symptoms of anxiety is nausea and stomach upset, the very thing you are afraid of. I think if you can get the OCD to settle down a bit, you will feel physically better which will in turn lessen you OCD further.
Since you have germaphobia and wash your hands a lot, Google "zylast". It's a soap that was formulated to kill the Ebola virus and help stop the recent outbreak in West Africa. It kills just about every germ that is out there and more importantly, it has a residual effect of up to 6 hours. Unlike other soaps or hand sanitizers, use it and it will continue to protect you hours later, so it will lessen the desire to wash your hands. You will only feel the need to wash your hands if they are actually dirty, like most people. It also comes in a lotion that in addition to killing pathogens, does a great job of moisturizing your skin.
Hang in there, you can beat this. OCD is usually a lifetime condition, but you can learn to manage it and will have times when you don't feel it most of the time and just have an occasional flare-up.
"The Only Thing We Have To Fear Is Fear Itself"
- Franklin Delano Roosevelt
Hey Shannon.
You painted a detailed picture of your situation.
It seems that you understand the difference between
what is real , reasonable and normal and what is unreal, unreasonable and extreme.
Can you go back to your childhood memories and find out
if someone in your family had some extreme or obsessive behavior toward perhaps cleanliness, food handling, health, etc. How about presently?
Were you ever reprimanded for something you did that was considered "wrong" in relation to cleanliness, food handling,
health matters...
Have you personally experienced anyone like a friend or relative getting very sick, let's say from food poisoning, gastroenteritis or other similar condition at any time?
If you have no memories of the above, does your therapist have any experience in hypnosis and/or regression and if yes
has s/he used it and what was the outcome?
Would you switch therapists if hypnosis/regression would help you deal with your issues?
BTW how is the therapy going so far?
How about the Prozac?
Was there a risk/benefit discussed with your treating doctor and did s/he make you aware of the risks and side-effects
when taking Prozac?
Would you be open to taper off Prozac (with the help of a health professional and switch to a natural serotonin supplement?
I know these seem like a lot of questions, lol!
You are lucky. Normally, in my office I hand out an incredibly long questionnaire, before any consultation takes place!
Please consider answering as many questions you are able to answer and this way, hopefully, I can offer you some better suggestions.
Best wishes,
Niko
You painted a detailed picture of your situation.
It seems that you understand the difference between
what is real , reasonable and normal and what is unreal, unreasonable and extreme.
Can you go back to your childhood memories and find out
if someone in your family had some extreme or obsessive behavior toward perhaps cleanliness, food handling, health, etc. How about presently?
Were you ever reprimanded for something you did that was considered "wrong" in relation to cleanliness, food handling,
health matters...
Have you personally experienced anyone like a friend or relative getting very sick, let's say from food poisoning, gastroenteritis or other similar condition at any time?
If you have no memories of the above, does your therapist have any experience in hypnosis and/or regression and if yes
has s/he used it and what was the outcome?
Would you switch therapists if hypnosis/regression would help you deal with your issues?
BTW how is the therapy going so far?
How about the Prozac?
Was there a risk/benefit discussed with your treating doctor and did s/he make you aware of the risks and side-effects
when taking Prozac?
Would you be open to taper off Prozac (with the help of a health professional and switch to a natural serotonin supplement?
I know these seem like a lot of questions, lol!
You are lucky. Normally, in my office I hand out an incredibly long questionnaire, before any consultation takes place!
Please consider answering as many questions you are able to answer and this way, hopefully, I can offer you some better suggestions.
Best wishes,
Niko
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Community
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.
PrEP is used by people with high risk to prevent HIV infection.
