HIV fear even after conclusive negative.

[Scotishdude]

Hello. I don't know if I have an OCD obsession with HIV or not. I had a scare due to a sex session with. Girl of unknown HIV status. 5 weeks later
I got really ill. Swollen glands everywhere. Weightloss. Night sweats, neuropathy, loss appetite, diahrea vomiting, pain everywhere and severe weakness. I was certain I had caught HIV from my symptoms. I told the girl who said she got tested and was negative 6-7 weeks after the incident but that wasn't enough for me for months and months and months I was petrified looking everything up every hour of the day even at work. 6 months passes and I worked the courage up and took a test it was thankfully negative though now I'm even thinking what if the lab was wrong what if there was a mix up what if I hadn't developed antibodies due to an under lying illness... Even to this day I'm still researching as I can't get my head round that illness. Iv never Been that sick and all the symptoms were at once.

What can I do to stop this it's starting too depress me as I feel as if I can't have sex with a monogamous partner incise they were wrong and I give them it....

Is this OCD? What can be done to help astop this?

[Scotishdude]

Thanks very much. I will contact them.

[57Carol]

they have a free hotline, and should be able to help you, or guide you to someone who can.

http://www.ocduk.org/adviceline

[57Carol]

contact OCD UK for help.

http://www.ocduk.org/ocd

and to keep yourself out of this trouble, you might not want to sleep around.

[Scotishdude]

I live in The United Kingdom

[Scotishdude]

Thanks. I forgot to add the girl also gave me chlamydia which fueled the HIV thoughts during and after the illness as I read it's easier to catch when passed with a another STD. I'm at my Whits end.

As iv never even to therapy or know anyone who has been I don't know what to expect. Any ideas what kind happens?

[JGF25]

An HIV test at 6 months is a conclusive test.  You are negative.   When did the stress start?  Right after you had sex?  Were you stressing about it for 5 weeks and then you became ill?  I ask because stress takes a heavy toll on the body and it can actually make you sick.  And of course if you are keyed in on one thing such as HIV, every little pain, ache, or whatever you have (things that you wouldn't bat an eye at normally) are now attributed to HIV.

You are in the What-if doubt phase.  I can't say if you have OCD or HIV anxiety.  The only person that can diagnose you is a professional and since you are still battling your mind after 6 months, it is time to see a psychologist so that you can learn cognitive behavioral therapy.  You have to stop yourself from checking.  Checking just keeps you in the irrational thinking loop.  You need to learn to let the thoughts wash over you and not fight them.

Here is a link to finding a therapist where you live

http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/