sexual curiosity?

[emilkat64850]

I walked into our living room today and caught my 2 year old daughter on top of my 5 year old son. He was holding her and humping her!

His pants were on but unbuttoned.

I explained to him that what he did was wrong because it was for grown ups only and not for children.

I also told him that people don't do that to their brothers or sisters.

He seems to be very interested in his sister and I know that he's touched her before and I thought I took care of it.

I've even caught him peeking at me in the bathroom throught the keyhole in the door.

Why is he so curious?

I no longer let them take baths together and they are not allowed to be naked unless they are taking baths or getting dressed.

He has shown her his private areas before. I just think that this is NOT normal curiosity and that somebody at some point has done something to him. I just have a bad feeling.

I'm not sure what else to do or what direction to go with this.

Should I talk to a doctor?

What else should I explain to both of them?

I'm so shocked and at a loss of what to do next.

[emilkat64850]

Thank you everyone for your input. My husband and I talked it over and concluded that I may have overreacted a little and that it is probably normal. We do feel as though our son has perhaps seen a movie that was inappropriate and was just copying what he had seen. There's no way to tell for sure. But he certainly didn't see it here. We decided to just keep a closer watch on the two and take more preventative steps. If it occurs again I think I'll bring it up with the pediatrician.

[dpfitzell]

I am a single full time dad and I don't think that something has happend to him. They mimic what they see and every thing on tv these days are swearing and sexual I would say make sure you be carefull on what your kids watch on tv. I have a comment about the person who said they would get cps involved you are a dangerous person you can ruin people lives and I hope that you think twice before you do these things to inoccent people I would talk to the parent and share my concerns with them. I am just saying that reporting to cps should only be done in known abuse because you can heart other people and we as a whole need to support each other.

[missy1980]

I just have to say first that nlamb71 is way out of line and I seriously feel sorry for anyone that has ever confided in her about anything personal in their lives. How would she or he feel if her daughter was the one exploring with our children and we called cps for a very what seems to be natural thing!!! There are millions of people out ther wondering the same thing we are... Is it normal??? Studies show YESSSSSS!!!!!!!!!! That nlamb71 is probably going to vote for our next president of the united states GOD HELP US ALL!!!!!!

That person is still living in 1920 and has no idea what goes on in the outside world.... It was the 70's folks that started liberating!!! We 80"S kids just did what we were taught.

Anyway now that I got that off my chest.......

I too am having an issuse with my soon to be 4 yr old "exploring". He has a 5 yr old cuz and a 3 yr old cuz both are boys. He also has a 3 yr old friend down the street he plays with everyday. She is girl and they do not play what my son refers to as "sex". I am almost starting to think that maybe his father is gay and hasn't come out of the closet. Or is it just because he feels more comfortable around boys... he only sees his dad 2x a week. My son has been educated on "private parts" and also inapropriate sexual behavior. I guess I just don't know what else to do other than ask his doctor.  Could it be, you think that I am not spending enough quality time with him?  I am a single mom who works alot of hours, he has a full time nanny who is his grandma. I guess I am super confused. We are a christian family and he gets sooooo much love and attention, more from his grandma cause she is more involved in every day activities. Any advice for me????

[SL345]

Talk to your son about what he is hearing, seeing and doing. Ask him how it makes him feel to do these things. Share with him your reaction. I'm assuming from your note that you have talked with him about his private parts and the private parts of others not being touched or shown to and by anyone, other than you, his grandma and the doctor. Mostly, provide more supervision when these children play together. Use it as an opportunity to open up communication with your child about this important part of life. There are Christian-value children's ooks written on this topic.

[Kimaling]

Hi Emilka:

I am so happy to see that everything is okay with your family and that although you are still a bit concerned, the reality is that kids explore all of the time.  It really is natural.  Some true causes for concern, which I've read about, would be inappropriate sexual play with adults (the child would initiate it), overly inappropriate touching of private areas (like penetration of fingers/objects, etc).

For member, Missy1980, I agree with some of the comments that member, SL345 has made.  You really need to get into your son's head and start asking some serious questions about his environment - when/when you're not around.  I don't want alarm you, but have you checked his anal area to see if everything's okay down there as well?  Just remember that it is OKAY for him to explore and touch himself and kids do explore with each other - at this point, there is no opposite sex - yes they understand that there are boys and girls, but when it comes to exploring sexually, children are very neutral and it is an innocent act.  Please don't scare him - many children that are frightened away from exploring themselves, etc often turn out to be sexually dysfunctional adults.  It's natural and they should be allowed to discover who they are.  

I trust that the outcome will be positive.

Member - Kimaling

[mom2threeChildren]

CPS can damage a family wrongfully.  They take children away first, and ask questions later.  CPS should not be involved with a child that age, not if it is just natural behavior.  You as a parent can make sure that your child would never be with the other one that has the *curiosity*.  You don't call CPS first and talk about it later.  You remove your child, and then talk to the other children's parents about their behavior.  If you have an inkling there might be abuse, then you could do what you could to protect the innocent child.  And I don't just mean yours.  Children are innocent, and sometimes are taught bad behavior by things done to them.  Sometimes it is normal, natural behavior.  Please do some researching and reading before you decide to haul in the authorities.