somebody, anybody, tell me to chill outttt!! "/

[OctoberMommy2014]

I don't know what's wrong with me, but at 12w4d I simply just don't feel pregnant.

my nausea is gone (unless something triggers it.. chicken for example), boobs aren't killing me, not really feeling the light "cramps" in my belly anymore, etc. my fiancé swears (and I do see it) that I have a cute little belly already, I'm still super tired/sleepy all the time, certain things trigger heartburn..

idk, I just know I've read too many stories of women still having pregnancy symptoms even after they've miscarried.
I last saw our baby at 9w4d & 9w6d.. first time was in the ER, second was at my 1st OB appt.
[again, diagnosed with a Subchorionic Hemorrhage - I've seen NO dark brown blood since about 11w].
I'm just scared to death to go to our next appt. at 13w6d (next thursday) & NOT see/hear a heartbeat.

are there signs of a miscarriage at this point? am I not the only one freaking out?! lol -- I almost upset my fiancé when I talk/worry so I've avoided saying anything to him.. so here I am, seeking answers from you ladies.
sorry it's so long.. 25, ftm, freaking out.. thanks in advance for your responses!!
keep us in your prayers!! ❤

[dragondance]

I miscarried in September and I was scared to death that there wasn't a baby inside me and i was having a false pregnancy.  I was shaking so bad at the ultra sound and when I heard the heart beat for the first time I sobbed. The only advice I can give you is to relax and have faith hormones fluctuate according to my mom (I went through not feeling pregnant too). Stress isn't good for either of you it will be okay :)

[Ooolala1988]

I've heard mixed reviews about fetal dopplers. I was going to get one in the beginning cause I worried a lot lol. But I decided not to because I think I would've stressed myself to death if I wasn't able to pick anything up on it!

[OctoberMommy2014]

@Ooolala1988: yes, it seems pretty common.. I hate that it could affect me feeling him/her move sooner, but as long as they're healthy... I'll CHILL OUT and wait!! lol

@sprmom87: I know I know, it's getting better.. I truly was a mess last week. & my fiancé agrees.. I should be happy that I'm not as miserable as I was.. taking deep, deep breaths & having faith!!! (((:
thank you so much!

[OctoberMommy2014]

awe, yes you're right.. aside from the Subchorionic Hemorrhage - I've also got to go see a specialist on May 6th regarding my cervix.

my OB THINKS, but isn't positive, that my cervix may be short/small.. just something else to worry about. I'm happy she brought it up, b/c all together I've had 3 separate doctors who've never said anything about my cervix being a potential problem if/when I decided to get pregnant.

just trying to stay positive, and I can NOT wait for this baby to start kicking me!! lol I know it's got to be tough, but geez.. we've had too many scares already too..

[sprmom87]

Breath woman and enjoy the days when you aren't hurting, puking, sore or swollen! You are gonna stess yourself too much and its not good for you or baby.

[OctoberMommy2014]

awe, I'm sooo looking forward to that!! gosh, I can't wait!
I keep telling myself this is a blessing & to enjoy it.. Lord I pray He helps me get to a more "relaxed" state of mind.. I'm getting there!!

thank you so much! (((: