Sudden panic regarding Labour

[Vic85]

Okay so I'm 24+4 weeks with my third child and have suddenly remembered that Labour actually hurts-argh! With my first I didnt know so went in with blind faith (ended up in labour for 13 hours-3 shots of pethidine and an epidural later and my daughter arrived), second time around it had been 4 years since the first labour so plenty of time to forget (2hrs 45mins in labour, gas and air and a shot of pethidine). For some reason this time its worrying me more its only been 14 months since i had TJ and I can remember EXACTLY how much it hurts. What I guess i'm tryin to say is PLEASE tell me it'll be easier again this time round? I know that he has to come out but OUCH it hurts!

[Vic85]

its not so much the getting up and around after that was worrying me-with both my two I was on my feet and in the shower after an hour, I do think you should try for vbac it is much less stress on your body and episiotomy is done rarely nowadays-my son was 8lb 13 and i didnt need one, i didnt even tear. Its just i remember the last 2 or 3 cm dilating was hard cos I couldnt get the gas and air to work and the contractions were fairly relentless by then. My husband watched me give birth and rather than be put off by it he was in awe of me for ages-he thought it was amazing, and the fact that we are now having our third goes to show that he still desires me! Although where we found the time with two to run around after i'm not sure!!

Riot_Queen :- I think I should thank my lucky stars that my experienes were better than yours. I was only 19 when i had my first and I found that the midwifes and doctors were less inclined to listen to you, its like cos your young they dont think you know how your body is feeling. I so hope you get  better experience this time, my worries pale into insignificance compared to yours. If you do get to try vbac then the chance are you wont be one of that 3% and i hope that your docs should be looking after you very well.

[Riot_Queen]

I've been having panic attacks too for some of the same reasons.
I have a NIGHTMARE birth with my daughter.
We were only 18 when we had her.
And although I have had experience with babies before because I practically raised my youngest brother from an infant till he was 2, hubby has never really even HELD an infant, let alone raise one.
For pretty much the first month or so of her life, he practically avoided whatever room I was in because he knew I was gunna ask him to take care of her so I could go eat, go to the bathroom or go have a cigarette, and he didn't want to.
That's caused ALOT of problems between him n I and I threatened to leave him on more than one occasion.

I was 8 days over due when I had her. They induced me, and it was H E L L!!
They told me she was gunna be about 8 1/2 pounds and she was really 3 ounces shy of 11!!
They did 2 epidurals BOTH they did WRONG and didn't do anything but leave me with lower back complications.
After 2 days of labor they just come outta nowhere and tell me they're gunna do a c-section. And that was NOT on my schedule so I started FREAKING OUT because I just can't handle the fact that I was gunna be cut open while awake and aware.
So not only was that scary, but ofcoarse, they don't remove the epidural and do a spinal, they leave the epidural thing in and inject the stuff to "Completely Numb Me" in-
KNOWING that the epidural WASN'T working because it wasn't place properly!!!
And so I get in there and they start cutting me open.
It was pretty okay at first. It was uncomfortable and burned a little bit.
It felt like how metal being scraped on contrete sounds, I guess I could say.
Then all over a sudden SHOOTING PAINS from where they were cutting me open. I could feel EVERYTHING.
That was the most painful thing I've EVER experienced and wouldn't put my most hated enemy through that!
They hadda put me to sleep and made hubby leave the room.

I have panic attacks atleast a couple times a week when I think about it and the sooner my due date approaches, the worse the panic attacks become.

I'm TERRIFIED that that's gunna happen to me again.
If I go into labor on my own before my scheduled c-section, I get to try a vbac, but I'm terrified that I'm gunna be one of the unlucky 3% that have their uterus' rupture and bleed or almost bleed to death.
So I have panic attacks about that too.

I also have panic attacks about hubby putting me through what he did with our daughter.
I'm scared that I'm gunna be stuck taking care of BOTH babies because Ivy's only gunna be 13 almost 14 months old when this one's born, all by myself.
I'm gunna be pretty much helpless for the first 2 weeks, and not that much better for 5-6 weeks.
I won't be able to do much with Ivy because I'm gunna be limited on mobility and things I'm allowed to do in that time frame.

I'm sorry I'm rambling.
I can't tell you that it's gunna be better or not because every pregnancy is different.
Some are better than others, some are worse.
I can say though, Labor gets easier with each baby. It usually goes faster.
I'm hoping for me that the doctors that I'm seeing this time around will do a better job than the ones I had with my daughter.

[chantal21]

It's normal to freak out. just make sure you have a good support system by your side and educate yourself. I had a midwife, so she would never consider an episiotomy unless it was absolutely necessary. My first son was over 8lbs and I delivered him with no problems.
My husband never thought about birth in a negative way and still finds me desirable. Birth is a beautiful process. =)

[annaleesmom]

well, I'm freaking out!  The thought of an eposotiomy (spelling???) terrifies me.

I'm worried that my boyfriend will think my body is too functional to be desireable.

yet I hated that lump feeling under my c-section and all the staples.  

[chantal21]

From what I have heard, a c-section has a longer recovery time, at least from the women I know who had them. The only reason I couldn't do much after my first, was because his head was coming down crooked and caused a lot trauma to me and his poor little head. This time around my son was positioned perfectly and came right out with no problems. i was able to get up just an hour after delivery. I also, have a bleeding problem after delivery, so I need to make sure I take it easy after birth. But this time around, for me, was wonderful and I am in no pain!
VBAC is a great option if your doc thinks it's fine. Since you have never given birth vaginally, it may be a little harder, only because your body has never done that before. But it could go just fine and happen quickly as well, you just never know. Every labor and delivery is different. It's something you can't predict. Talk to your doc about it, I'm sure things will be just fine!

[annaleesmom]

so, you guys are freaking me out!   I had a c-section with my first.  A few hours after I was up and moving around.  it was painful and pretty tender for about a week or two ( if i remember correctly)

Now i'm concerned about vbac.  What if I have a vaginal delivery??  Will it be difficult like having a 1st child??  Is that worse than a c-section recovery wise??  you ladies were talking about not being able to get up and about?  I was up moving after a couple hours.  

I have my ist doctors appointment next week.  pretty nervous here.  

[chantal21]

I was feeling the same way!! My kids are 16 months apart and believe me, I did not forget that pain with my first. It was only the last few hours that hurt the most with my first, but still it was painful. I was in labor with him for 13 hours, about 4 of those hours being very painful and then I pushed for 1 hour and 20 min!!! I also did it all natural as well.

With my second, (he is just 8 days old), I was praying for a much smoother delivery. My midwife warned me that it could go much faster this time around. She was right. I was in active labor not quite 3 hours, and pushed him out in not even 10 min. (4 pushes)
The last 45 min. hurt like heck, but that was it! Labor is painful no matter what, but it was MUCH easier this time around. My recovery time has been amazing as well. With my first I could barely walk for 2 weeks! This time, I was able to walk normally and do small things just 3 days after delivery. It was amazing.
You will be okay. The fact that your body has done this before is great and things should go a lot faster an easier, hopefully!