How to manage after ectopic/miscarriage

[renee82]

OK ladies I have no idea what i should be doing or feeling. I know there are some ladies that have had miscarriages and ectopics. I just really feel lost lately. I thought I was doing ok the after the first loss in sep and the first month after the second, but after that I am all over the place. After having 2 ectopics within 6 months of each other and both resulting in emergency surgery, I still want another baby but DH doesnt want to consider any type of option. Thats all I can think about , I mean I still have 1 ovary and tube left so I can concieve  but DH is afraid of the risks. I have been taking birth control for the last 6 weeks just to ensure the healing of my body before we start even thinking about  TTC but BD is not even the vocab, well not for me anyways. My question to some of you ladies that have been through a loss, is how did you manage to get through it and want to TTC again

[mamaof4410]

I have 3 children and one on the way. I have had 2 miscarriages and they are never easy and no matter what anyone says you have to heal at your own pace. You lost a baby, and that is never easy to let go of. I felt so lost afterwards. DH didn't understand how I was feeling (he's one of those guys that don't talk about how he feels) I knew that but it still hurt that no one understood how I felt. I have never had a good relationship with my mom and for some reason she was the only person I wanted to be around afterwards and it made it a little worse when she would bascially tell me she didnt have "time" to talk.
But i let my feelings out, If you want to cry then cry. It made me feel alot better. You should sit down with your DH and explain to him that having a child is still really important to you and you want him to support you. Tell him you know what the risks are but are willing to take that chance for the sake of you having a child.
After I had my mc's I waited until I was ready physically but mostly emotionally to try again. Just in case the same thing happened again. But heal at your own pace and as long as you feel ready and your doc gives you the go ahead, I would go for it. Good Luck to you.

[coffeebuzzedliz]

I have one child, and because of this I am trying to look past my 2 M/C and say if I did it once I can do it again. I also have realized, espcecially being on here that it happens  A LOT, and I know that doesnt make it better but it helps to know I am not alone in this. I also try to think that there was a reason my 2 pregnancies didnt last and that will make the 1 that does work that much more amazing.