Lol alright, thanks! This helps :)
Its not painful. Its just uncomfortable. I had mine done without my doctor telling me. I was uncomfortable and couldn't figure out why until she was done and told me. You do not have to get it done. Your doctor will probably ask. (Mine didn't but personally I'm not complaining lol).
No. Many providers don't do that as a general rule and if your doctor talks about doing one you can certainly refuse. Your body knows how to go into labor on its own without irritating your cervix like that.