Tareing giving birth

[Stacey91]

Can you tell by your shape or size before you give birth if you will tare or not .. And do many women tare?

[Stacey91]

I love the info you get on here! Girls who really have been there done that instead of reading doctors articles or nhs info lol

[Stacey91]

Thanks Clysta :)  aww ino I have started to just call my stretch marks my baby lines lol ! The more they are taking over the less I am now caring lol.. Then they started popping up in other places and I was like huh?, lol but I think its just due to swelling.. Plus I am enjoying the excuse of being preggy for eating slightly more lol!!

[Clysta]

Everyone is unsure when they've not done it. Even if you've had children before you're never really prepared - all pregnancies and all deliveries have the chance to be polar opposites of each other. It's good to educate yourself, but don't focus on the negatives and worst case situations. Stretch marks, weight gain, tearing, etc etc are just another part of pregnancy and motherhood - at the end of the day, you won't care. Looks fade and diminish in time, and true beauty isn't based solely on the physical.

Don't hesitate to ask anything that you wonder about, all questions are welcome.

[Stacey91]

God it sounds like so much hard work! Go all you girls for doing such a gd job.. When u havent been through it yet which I am sure yous all  no its hard to imagine yourself coping lol I am such a big baby and get really grossed out  by things lol.. Cant wait to see my bubs tho! Trying to educate myself as much as poss in preparation as I know labour is unpredictable and even tho I do have a birth plan and back uo lol they may not  happen! Ooo overwhelmed with excitement and fear lol

[SunWorshiper_26]

Tearing is no fun but no way to know if you will or not :(. Most of us did or will tear (or be cut to avoid tear) but don't worry too much once you have your baby in your arms you won't care

[stacey10]

oops clysta :) and its perineal sorry about the spelling, but if your really worried and serious about not tearing, yes you do have to listen to the instructions as they're comming from people who can see whats going on down there and they would prefer it if you didnt tear as well :) , its a hard thing to imagine but you do really have to concentrate as your body is screaming at you to push and you cant so it does take alot of concentration not too :)

[Stacey91]

I'll be sure to take all instructions seriously then lol and not get carried away! Going to read up more on this paranial stuff too! So scared of tearing lol! .. Thanks girls

[mamaof4410]

I tore with my first son and he was 7lbs 3oz. I had my second my little girl and she was 8lbs 8 oz and didn't tear. Then with my 3 rd 7lbs 7oz no tearing. Then i had my fourth 8lbs 15 oz and no tearing. I don't know why I tore the first time but it wasn't bad. The stitches scared me worse than the tearing.

[stacey10]

as calista has said you can prepare your parenial area before hand by massage, the earlier you start the better and it does halp, its actually not the size (weight) of the baby that makes your tare, its the head size, also its about control and when your told to stop pushing, you have to do just that, so that requires alot of disipline as your body is urging you to push!, and when they say baby pushes or little pushes again you have to do just that, this lets the sking slowly thin out and stretch and allow bubs heads to ease out, if you just straight push bubs head out thats when your more likey to have major tearing as the skin hasnt had time to slowly thin out

[Stacey91]

Thanks v much girls .. I just have so many questions and worries lol.. I used to just google all my questions and concerns but im so glad I have now found this forum its on my fone app I love it.. Hearing about other peoples expeiriences is much more interesting! And tbh correct! Although my profile sais I am male lol and I cant seem to change it lmao

[SiSi_]

I tore while giving birth and you know what? Recovery wasn't bad!!! Everyone kept scaring me telling me how much it hurt but it didn't. I had like 3 or 4 stitches n I hardly noticed them. As long as you clean it n use the pain spray you wont notice. Especially since you will have your lil baby!! Try not to stress over it!

[Clysta]

Many women tear - its better to naturally tear than be cut. An episiotomy can take longer to heal (they usually make the cut much longer than needed) and some women still tear when cut making it worse.

I had 2 small tears when I had my daughter, and only one needed a few stitches. (I believe 6 total) My daughter was 6 pounds, 12 ounces and it took an hour to push her out and I am of average size (5'2" and 100 pounds). They completely healed in two weeks. You can do messages to reduce the chance that it will happen in labour.

[whatstheodds]

I think alot has 2 do with the size of the baby or how fast they come out. I have had 4 kids didn't really tare with my first 3 but I did pretty bad with my last. He wasnt even 7 lbs but he came so fast his shoulders made me tare.

[Stacey91]

How the midwives no if your going to tear .. God I hope I dont.. Did u have to get stitches.. I thought it was tear but I seen another post on here where the girl wrote tare and thought I was wrong lol then when I looked at it I thought it then looked wrong lol

[megan210792]

i dnt think it matters what shape or size u are. most midwives will cut u if they think u will tear cz stitching a cut is easier. i was cut twice on my 1st but didn get cut or tear on my son.

[Stacey91]

*tear ... Im not quite sure how to spell it lol