who is the father?

[mommakitaen24]

I am in a horrible situation and I am not proud of it, at all. My husband and I were apart for a few months. During that time apart, I was seeing a friend of mine and slept with him once. The date of my lmp was december 10th of 2010 and it ended on december 14th. I usually go 30 days between periods.  My friend and I had unprotected sex on december 15th..he did not ejaculate inside of me. On december 24th, my husband and I reconciled and slept together and he ejaculated in me twice that night. According to this information, the internet says that my most fertile days were between december 23rd and december 28th. I took a pregnancy test on january 13th and that came up positive. My estimated due date is september 16th of 2011. I am freaking out right now cause I have this huge fear that this baby may not be my husbands. I would like some advice, maybe from those who have been/are in the same situation. Thank you.  

[ninky724]

Well ladies i don't no how certain this is ,but when i thought i was having a miss i went to the e/r and the doctors were telling me that sometimes women have miss when the mans sperm isn't compatiable with the females body and like you said kamil119 it might be a true it might not who nos we all just want the best for you. GOODLUCK

[vmvnpv]

You may be citing what you saw on the Discovery Channel but it's not a proven fact so you are giving this woman false hope.

[kamil119]

if she's having more sex with her boyfriend than her husband, then she's in a pickle. I'm just citing what I saw on the Discovery channel. And maybe it also has something to do with regular partners being more 'suitable' to be  fathers, it makes sense, too.

[alaysha]

If that theory was true then she would be pregnant by the other guy and NOT her husband since she stated that her husband and her had been separated for MONTHS before this whole scenario happened.

[vmvnpv]

Actually, the theory is not even what you said but that a womans body would reject the sperm of a less suitable partner.  I've never even heard of a womans body rejecting another mans sperm because of the partner not being their regular partner.  Tell that to the millions of women who have babies by men who are not their regular partner and then have to have a paternity test to prove who the father is.

[vmvnpv]

Kamil~That research is not proven at all.  It's just a theory.  The only time a womans body would reject sperm is if they have an autoimmune disease that sees sperm as dangerous invaders.  Just because you have regular sex with one man DOES NOT mean your body will reject another mans sperm.  You hear of women getting pg all the time with men other than their partners.  And there's such a thing as donor sperm that women get pg with when their partner can't get her pg.

And I completely disagree with anelicbaby's advice.  If you're working on having an open and honest marriage with your husband then you need to be up front with him.  You guys were separated when you had sex with the other guy.  So what happens if the other guy happens to be the father?  Your husband will be devastated because a) he's not the dad and b) you lied to him.

[kamil119]

research shows that when a woman has sex with her regular partner and also other men, her body usually reject the other guy's sperm as foreign body and she is more likely to get pregnant with her husband. This should be comforting news for you! I'm betting on your husband.

[angelicbaby]

Do not feel bad! if u don't ur husband to find out have the other guy tested when the baby is born and if he is not the father then u know for sure that it is ur husbands. U can't be to sure otherwise. hope everything works out and congrats. try not to stress it.

[vmvnpv]

Alaysha is right (and I meant to write that too).  Sperm can last up to 5 days (and sometimes 7) in your vagina if the conditions are right.  That means even though you had sex on CD5 there is a possibility if you ovulated on CD13 you can still get pg from the other guy.  Not highly likely but has been known to happen.

[alaysha]

Also sperm (if there was any) can survive for up to 7 days. I'd put my money on it being your husbands but nothing will be 100% unless you get a paternity test since the date are so close.

[vmvnpv]

Also, not all women ovulate smack dab in the middle of their cycle.  It depends on the luteal phase.  For example, you could have a 30 day cycle one month but ovulate on CD18, meaning your luteal phase is only 12 days long.  Chances are your luteal phase is always 12 days long (meaning your period starts 12 days after you ovulate).  So the next month you could ovulate on CD 15 and start your period 12 days later (meaning you only had a 27 day cycle).  I hope that made sense.  My point is, though, you may not personally ovulate on CD 14.  Every woman is different.

[vmvnpv]

It sounds to me like there's a good chance your husband is the father.  However, you can't know for sure until you have a paternity test when the baby is born.

[NicoleW09]

It's hard to say since the dates are so close together. If you consistantly have a 30 day cycle, my guess would be your husbands. The only way to know for sure is to have a paternity test. Women with a 28 day cycle ovulate on cd 14. You were on cd 5 when you had sex with your friend, so I think it was a little too early.