second time boyfriend i need help plz

[godgoldenangel]

hi am 16  i have a problem i am in my second relationship and i really love this boy. but im scared that i will have sex with him.im a virgin and a Christan.friends and family told me not to have sex until marriage but im just not getting that im my head.no my boyfriend never force me or ask me for sex and he said that he want to wait too but im just scead that my emotions or feelings will get the better or me and scead that every thing i know about abstinence will go out of my head    

[Peanutbct]

You really have to do some soul searching on what you really believe.  Not what others want you to believe, but what you believe.  Then once you decide what it is you believe, stick with it.  Maybe find somone you can confide in to help you through this time of uncertanity.  Someone who can listen and then maybe give you some advice.  I am 31 years old.  I went my whole teenage years without having sex.  I ended up having it in my early 20s and after i did it realized i wasn't ready.  I wish i would have put more time and thought into it before i did it.  Be careful and make sure if you do have sex that its what you really, really want.  Once its done, its done and then you may end up hating yourself for it.  16 years old is hard enough without adding bonus problems to it.  Make sure you and your boyfriend are on the same level of love for each other and comitment before you have sex. and after all your soul searching you decide sex isn't something you want right now, stick to it!  Do not let any guy talk you out of it.  If a guy really loves you, he will respect your decision.  And if you do have sex, please use a condom, don't get pregnant.  Make sure the guy has a condom. you also want to protect yourself against STDs.  

[tbabi20]

Are you really in love? Well my friend, read 1 Corinthians 13 over and over until you know it by heart. Then compare it with your actual situation. But be honest! Not that easy, eh? It takes time, care and consistency to reach that level of love and... to maintain it.

A pastor told me the best thing to do is to always pray before meeting and while being with each other because we are human and will succumb to temptation if we don't ask for help. Going out with other friends as a double date will keep temptation at bay too....

I think if you think that you have problems controlling yourself, I don't know if it's best if you continue to see this guy. Maybe you guys should take a break until you both are strong enough to stay away from sex. Is he a christian too? If he is it'll be easier to stop yourselves since both of you guys would be on the same page that sex is not intended for the unwed.

I think this will help too:  

1. A healthy self-confidence: Having a positive attitude about yourself will help you to expect respectful treatment from any relationship. And being respected means only being with a guy who will accept your boundaries about physical intimacy. That means talking about NOT having sex.

2. Think. Don't let his smooth words or gentle touch under the moonlight blur your mind. Be rational. Life is nothing like the movies. Do you really know this guy? Imagine that, instead of being at the beach at midnight, you two are in the living room. See how he interacts with your family and friends.. if he only wants to be with you and makes you feel bad about it, chances are he has interest somewhere else.

3. Prayer: You'll need lots of it. And really mean that. . Pray for a sound mind and self-control.

4. Accountability Partner: Do you have a level-headed friend? If not, now is the time to search for one. Tell her what your goal is, and give her permission to ask you difficult questions. Add her to your speed dial, and text or call her at the first sign of Cupid's sting.

I suppose it depends on your relationship with Jesus whether you'll remain a virgin or not. This means not buying into the world's propaganda regarding issues of sexual intimacy. It means proceeding prayerfully, cautiously, and with all purity in every relationship. :D

Good luck and may God be with you as you strive toward staying pure. If you have any more questions or need to talk you can always message me too :) Take care!