Not sure

[willitwork]

I am 35 and my boyfriend is 50.
We have been going out for 3 years and are very happy but he seems to think that I would be better off without him. I have decided that I dont want children but he thinks that I will be missing out and as he doesnt want more children he has some insecurities. He also sometimes mentions havign someone to look after me properly.
We are both happy though so do you think it will work longer term?
Any of you guys been through the same thigs?

[iam1butterfly]

My older guy voiced the same insecurities... about my leaving him and all. He'd say
that he couldn't understand what I saw in him. Only, after we had several heartfelt discussions about our rather unconventional relationship, did he become convinced that my feelings were as deep... and as real... and as sincere as his own... and, that I was in the relationship for the long term... for however long that would be. He died of a massive heart attack 2 months after that conversation. And, I don't regret a single moment that we spent together.

[willitwork]

He has always said this to me so it is nothing new.
He is insecure I think and worries about me leaving him.
the feedback is not too positive - i will have a chat with him.

[iam1butterfly]

The age difference is no different now than what it was 3 years ago. So, unless he's been telling you, for the past 3 years, that you'd be better off without him... I suspect that something is up with him. From my experience with a now deceased significantly older (26 years older) significant other... there were major medical issues that he was addressing. My older guy felt that he couldn't give me quality time and, he'd often say that he believed that I was being cheated out of having a fulfilling relationship. So, it's possible that your guy is speaking from the perspective of an aging and ailing man who's entering his 50s.
As far as if it will last in the long term... one could pose that question about any relationship. Age or generational differences is a factor, but it's not the only factor in a relationship. In my view, compatibility and a solid personality match would have more bearing on a successful relationship than an age gap.

[mamabalas]

I feel for your situation.  No, I am not in the same, but a woman who is very dear to my heart is.  She and her late husband were 30 years apart, him being 30 years her senior.  They were happy, and had quite a lot of good years of marriage together.  The relationship was not without it's issues age related.  She spent many of his lat years taking care of him as though many of us do our parents.  This was very hard for her, and sometimes she does wonder now if it was worth it.  She loved him there is no doubt, but several years of her marriage were spent more as a caretaker than wife.  These were very sad, long years.   Many of these years she couldn't work, or at least couldn't work full time.  Remember you aren't building any social security income at this time, and you may need it depending on your financial situation.  I am not trying to be negative, but sometimes we are so blinded by the positives we don't think about these things.  

I too wonder why he is so ready to walk away.  He truly may have great insecurities, and the age issue may bother him a great deal more than it bothers you.  He may never believe you truly don't want children, some people can't imagine a woman not wanting children.   I'm not suggesting that this relationship is doomed, you just may have a harder go at it than some.  If you two are truly happy and this relationship is meant to be, I hope you have a lot of happy years together.  Good luck.

[specialmom]

Well, every relationship is going to be different.  I am curious why your man is saying this though.  He loves you so much that he'll walk away for your greater good?  It makes me wonder if he might want out.  Not being rude but something to consider.  At the very least, he's having doubts about it all.  Some relationships have no issues with such an age difference although it is something to consider in the elder years.  When he is 80 and you are 65,  you will be in very different places.  You'll have to accept that in your elder years you may be spending some of them alone.  (tend to look at the big picture, forgive me.)  But many relationships work out like this and all is fine so it is dependent on those actually in the relationship.  good luck