Addiction

[rehma123]

i ju found out accidentally, that my husband watches porn every night on the net. i know that this might b normal for sum, but i cant stop crying and thinking what it means. i am now 12wks pregnant and i was told to be stress free, obviously thats nt happening.  help please, i really dont no wat to do. confront him or keep it to myself?

[teko]

I think you are over reacting actually. I dont mean to undermine your feeling by any stretch of the imagination but he is viewing and not hanging out in the bar till 3am with women or in strip joints. Probably curious and availability which is just too easy to get to these days. He is obviously sneaking around and hiding the fact and Im not saying its right either. Of course not. But crying and carrying on is probably why you just found out about it. TALK! about why it bothers you and tell him how it makes you feel. Laying down the law and crying about it will simply make him lie to you and find better ways to sneak around. Dont make him feel evil over it and just like with kids the bigger the deal you make out of it, the more they do it. Find out why he is doing it and go from there. Im sure it has nothing to do with his love for you.

[GACarol]

Personally it wouldn't bother me a whole lot if my SO was watching porn but i understand to others that they would view it just as they would an actual affair. I think the way you speak with him about it is going to be very important. I wouldn't approach him in a confrontational manner but rather as you are trying to understand why he feels the need to watch it. Is there something he wants from your personal intimacy time that he is not getting but can watch, is he feeling like there is not enough quantity, or what exactly draws him to it. Then depending on how he answers you go from there. Are you certain it is EVERY night? This could actually turn into a good thing if you approach it in a way that you want to find out the reason first and then work on that. Can you share any other info without feeling like you are telling details you aren't comfortable with?

[mooksmom]

You are going to have to deal with it...now or at some point.

[vicki595]

Hey-  I'm sorry. It must make you feel terrible...   Listen, it's not abnormal but every night
is damn excessive.  If this were me, I'd definitely speak with him about it in a non confrontational way...right before I threw the computer out the window!!

I'd be mad,too,in other words...so talk with him.

Good luck!

[Eebb26]

I think you have to confront him otherwise it will be festering and causing u more stress. U need to be calm  but clear that this is not acceptable. At least I don't think it's acceptable behavior for a married man. Is it normal? Im sure it is but lots of things we want to do aren't necessarily the right thing to do. How did u find out? Just curious. While u r sleeping? I remember b4 we were married, finding some magazines and being pissef n not to mention humiliated and it is bad for a woman's sell esteem when her husband/boyfriend is fantasizing about someone else. I think that's the most upsetting part. Aren't I enough for you? Don't I make u happy? Ext, ext.... Good luck