Friends after divorce?

[penquinrbc]

Can you be friends after you are divorced?  Thanks!

[Chima7]

Right now you can't be friends with your ex because you still want to get back together with him but he has already moved on. The only way it works being friends with an ex is after both people are over it and don't have the desire to get back together again. Until then, since you have a son with him, the only thing you should be talking about with him is related to your son. All other topics and I mean all other topics are off limits. You need to stop hanging on to a relationship that wasn't meant to be. The more you keep living in the past the harder it will continue to be for you to move on. There's someone way better out there for you but you'll never meet him if you keep pining away for your ex all the time.

[shadowxxman]

no you cannot be friends with an ex

[specialmom]

I'm sorry. It sounds like you are hurting from this.  You know, I would just be business like regarding your son.  He's trying to let you know that he cares about a positive mutual parenting experience but is not interest in rekindling the relationship. Since he knows that you are on some level, he is probably right to make this a clean break without pretending to be friends when you read more into it.  But it hurts.  

breaking up with someone is like a death.  You have to mourn it.  It's complicated when we have a child and have to stay in contact to some extent, but I would just keep everything revolving around your son for now.  

As you both move on, friendship might be easier.  good luck

[penquinrbc]

June and July were great months for communications only because I had hope we would be together again, Come August he was really distant from me because he didn't want to give me that false hope.  I was devastated say the least.  Now of days we only talk about our son.  If I get off subject he tends to not respond via text.  He is real distant.

[jimi1822]

The answer is yes -=0) There are many variables to the question but my ex wife and I are friends after a 4 year marriage we even share custody of our chihuahua and yes I am remarried and very happy =0)

                                                             Prayers and Blessings

                                                                            jimi (lil wing =0)

[nini301]

Hi. I am now 19 years old but i have been married already once at the age of 16!! We met when i was 14 and married by the time i turned 16 then was divorced when i turned 18. Even though we have no kids together and did go through hell and back with lies, cheating, etc we didn't talk for a whole year and now we have both moved out of state and he still keeps in touch with my family. It was hard to face him when i did see him again but when he told me that he will always care for me and always be there no matter what and that he didn't have any hard feelings towards me, it made it alot easier to accept the fact that we can be friends but i will not engage in nothing more bc i am happy now and we both have moved on with our lives. It may not seem easy to befriend an ex bf or husband but its not as hard as what people think it is. Have you guys talked at all?? Do you talk on a regular basis?? Like specialmom said " true buddies are difficult to accomplish."

[specialmom]

Hi there and welcome.  Well, it depends.  I think that if a couple has kids together, they certainly can forge a new relationship that is cordial, business like and friendly for the sake of their kids.  But true friends, probably not.  The reason is that often one of the two in the dissolved relationship has unresolved feelings.  That makes it hard to really be on equal terms after the divorce.  Plus, it can get in the way when the couple begins dating and their new partner is uncomfortable with the friendship of ex's.  Unless the ex embraces the new partner, then it works better.  But often, it is just too complicated for that.  

I certainly think a couple can be friendly after a divorce and it is worth trying.  but true buddies is difficult to accomplish.  good luck