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Masterbation over Sex with me
I am wondering if it is safe to think that my husband is addicted to masterbation? He is harder to please with foreplay , his penis isnt as hard as it used to be very flacid. It seems to take quite a long time before he is aroused. We have sex and I saw him masterbate in the shower shortly after we were finished.(accidently saw this) and at that point I started putting 2 and 2 together. I have tried oral sex and he will say I have to get ready for work, go to the shower and masterbate. We have been married 20 years and we are best friends. But something has been missing and I think this is why its missing.I will listen to any advice. And btw I know that masterbation is ok.. My thing is that he isnt interested in me anymore. Im feeling really sick about this and not sure how to approach this.. HELP please
A lot of times when a man masturbates over taking advantage of available sex, he is not willing to put out the effort to please his partner. I think there is nothing wrong with masturbation either, but to refuse sex...? He clearly is interested in his own release and not interested in yours.
does he take any medication? various medications can hinder one's ability to achieve orgasm...I take a few of them..and find myself doing the same thing (with the same result)..have you sat down and discussed it with him (outside of the bedroom or where ever you normally have sex)? explain your frustration and see if he'll talk to you about it. He may masturbate frequently and his hand is considerably different feeling than you and he may grip tighter...
when my now wife and I started having sex it was at the end of a 5 year "drought" for me and I had been masturbating frequently and I found it very difficult to achieve orgasm during sex..she certainly enjoyed it but it was a vicious cycle for me..once I stopped masturbating for a week or 2 or she stimulated me with her hand we gradually found success...
I hope the problem doesn't go deeper than that.
Jim
when my now wife and I started having sex it was at the end of a 5 year "drought" for me and I had been masturbating frequently and I found it very difficult to achieve orgasm during sex..she certainly enjoyed it but it was a vicious cycle for me..once I stopped masturbating for a week or 2 or she stimulated me with her hand we gradually found success...
I hope the problem doesn't go deeper than that.
Jim
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