a relationship question for a couple. we have been dating since summer 2016

[kr33ch]

I went on a date with someone for the first time the end of May 2016.  we met at a dance club.  since then we have been intimate with our friendship.  and we were doing the friend thing and having fun and also having an intimate sexual relationship.  then i realized, or had been thinking, how can i define our relationship.  are we friends, dating, a couple, friends with benefits, so yea, the list can go on and on.  i don't even think he could say monogymy, he jus said "the M"  something like " I can do the M thing"
and since October 2016 I've been exclusively just sleeping intimately with him.  and the election almost put a wedge between us.
but lets not go there, thats another topic, and i am like Geometry.    tagents all day!  
just before christmas my sister came and visited.  and thats when we once again had to redefine the relationship.  at least explain to my sister who this man was and what his or mine or our intentions are..... were..... etc.

and he said as long as i behave we'll be together.   LOL!  and once again we discussed the nature of sleeping around and he did say one of me is just enough for him.

slight tangent.  cuz i forgot to mention, i am naughty!  so behavior is totally relevant.  

but moving along with my story, next came the holiday and we celebrated christmas together
and christmas day was wonderful.  very emotional too.  
i got a hillary doll.  i cried.  moving on cuz i can't let a petty political wedge ruin this.

and then literally the day after xmas.  he got sick.  flu.  vomit.  gotta go gotta go.  the works.  you name it.

and sick for the whole week.  he called in a couple of days from work.  i worked throughout the week.  i offered help and he declined.  so i insisted, and brought medicine and the BRAT diet.  gatorade.  coconut water.  get well card.  applesauce.  rice.  imodium.  pepto.  tylenol and tylenol pm.  

and now i ask myself..... did i not go over enough while he was sick?  should i have brought medicine over sooner?  

then comes another holiday new years eve comes and he goes to hospital cuz hes been ill for a week.  

and jus like with the flu, increase liquids, follow brat diet, youre dehydrated.  here's an iv.  thats what the hopsital  did for the visit for his flu (thats generally what they do with everyone with the stomach flu who goes to see the doc, right?)  

and so new years comes around and i bring the celebration to him at his house.

and he is sick.  

and last weekend we went to a house warming party with some mutual friends.  he is still somewhat sick.  hardly drank any beer or anything.

now its another 7 days later, and he is still a little sick.  

mind you for the past 7 months we have both worked full time jobs and have sundays off together.  we don't live together and we live on diff parts of town.  generally speaking we only hang out on the weekends and almost every sunday night since last may.  we've gone out of town here and there but for the most part once a week we visit hang out visit, slumber, just enjoy each other's company.  

and this past fall we tried to go out on tuesday nights, stay the night together and again stay the night together on sat or sun nights.  so we stayed together 2 to 3 nights a week.  

but since the illness i've kept my distance and i miss him.

i've seen him the past for the past three weeks.  and stayed the night on the weekend.  

last night i stayed at his house and we both slept on the couch downstairs with the tv on, when we generally sleep in bed together, but sometimes we do sleep down stairs on the couch.  

so now that i have kind of set the scene, i have all the questions but the most important questions to ask now in summary is:  am i trippin?  should we move in together?  should we redefine our relationship again?  is our age difference so relevant and is it playing a role in our dynamic?  he doesn't want me to take him out or buy him things.  he wants to be moderately frugal.  is that weird?  do you think he is bothered by this past presidential election by seeing that something so petty could come between us?  this next one is prolly silly, but......  is it a big deal that one facebook i used to say single and his used to say its complicated(its been that since i met him... possibly b4 i met him).  now mine says im in a relationship and his hasn't changed.  

[Nighthawk61]

I too think it's too early for you and your bf to move in together. You've mentioned an age difference but didn't  divulge the numbers. What are your goals? Do you want to be married and have children? how does he stand on that subject? Is he older with children and not excited about being a dad again.? You mentioned he's frugal, does that bother you? or would it be good for you to be with someone who is more careful with money?

I agree with SM, that personal views and values are important to be in sinc, otherwise it's important that couples are able to lovingly agree to disagree. If it it more like a battle when discussing your separate opinions, that will get old, fast.

Can you ask him why he's put "complicated" in his status on facebook and not that he's in an exclusive relationship. What is he waiting for to say he's exclusively in a relationship? I think it would bother me a great deal if my bf wasn't happy about saying that we were together at this stage.

[specialmom]

This is still a fairly new relationship.  I would keep just dating/friending and not move in---  and see where it goes.  To be honest, I really couldn't find much of a question in your post.  Not every relationship is clear cut right off the bat.  He seems fond of you.  But is he ready to make you the main event in his life?  not sure.  And you don't sound ready for that either.  And really, politics aren't that important ---  but you are a bit obsessed with mentioning it.  What IS important is that our political party represents our views/values often.  And if you two are opposite political parties, you probably have differences that will be hard to overcome.  My husband and I are the same. We feel the same about money, social values, religion, etc. and it is much easier to build a life together.  I respect when he has a difference of opinion and would never just sit and fight about it.  But it's the bigger picture that you need to focus on with the political thing.  good luck