Fighting with the hubby

[Mommy_Daddy_2]

So I had our second child on Sept 9th. We've been together 10 years married for almost 6. I'm 24 he is 26. We've talked about having kids since I was 17 now i brought up trying for our third and final child and all the sudden he tells me he doesn't want anymore. My heart is broken and he doesn't seem to understand why. I told him if he didn't want any more then he could go get a vasectomy and his response was we will talk about it later. I'm soooo frustrated and hurt right now I don't even want to be in bed with him. Is it wrong of me to feel this way?

[Mommy_Daddy_2]

So happy my hubby talked to people at work today and when he came home we sat down and talked and he is fine again with having three kids :)

[Chima7]

It's a tough call. It's possible that he is concerned about the financial responsibility. Let's be honest, life is expensive. Kids are even more expensive. Three kids are even more expensive. Perhaps if you stick with just 2 you can make sure those 2 get the best possible life has to offer. But if you have 3 it could be harder to make that happen.

Anyway, it's not going to be an easy discussion to have with him.  But try as much as you can to be open to what he has to say. Who knows, maybe if you give it some time he might change his mind again? You never know. Anything is possible.

[Londres70]

You just had a baby and now you are bringing up plans for a 3rd?  
Sounds like your timing isn't good.  

Why not just enjoy this newborn and have this discussion at a later date?  Don't badger him and let him reopen the discussion.

Is he the only one working?  If he is I can imagine he is worried how can he support a wife and three children.

You definitely need to come up with a BC plan until you two sort this out.

[Mommy_Daddy_2]

I wasn't even referring to trying right away. I have my 6 week follow up on Tuesday and will be discussing what method of birth control to use or what not and my husband who has had no issue with the thought of three kids all the sudden doesn't want anymore. On top of it all I'm terrified of getting on birth control due to itbtaking me 3 yrs to conceive our first and another 2 1/2 for our second and I don't want my last and final child to be more than 3-4 years away from my daughter. I just need my husband to sit and actually talk to me but when I tried bringing it back up he blew me off.

[RockRose]

I agree with tinkerbell.  It sounds like he is tired right now.  Having a one month old baby is exhausting,  as you know.  I think it's wise for him to re-think how he feels about having more,  and taking some time to adjust to having two.

It would be foolish,  IMHO,  to go get a vasectomy now when the decision isn't made yet,  and shouldn't be made yet.

I would suspect your hormones are making you a little emotional.  I think he's using great judgement here.

[EVE88WHITE26]

You might want to discuss this with a third party if it's affecting your relationship.Often a therapist will look at both sides and my offer some useful advice.Best wishes Eve

[TTinKKerBBell]

I totally agree with UnsureMS

I would suggest Your timing is wrong since You just gave birth barely a month ago.  It really wouldn't be fair to the Children You have now to have a third child this soon, as we all know babies take much attention from the rest of the Family.
Your Husband may feel very different about having a third Child later but if not, in my book the "no" wins as we are talking L I F E T I M E commitments and obligations when it comes to parenting.

GoodLuck

[UnsureMS]

I don't believe you are wrong but do you even know whàt brought up this change in him? Maybe he feels overwhelmed already. Children aren't always easy and the finicial strain of children can also become to much. Don't just look at it from your stand point try to hear him out too. He said talk ya will talk about it later. I think that maybe his way of giving you time to cool down. He probably knows it means alot to you, but he has his own concerns now.

All I can say is talk to your husband...and good luck