This is 2 part question.

[hock02]

So I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for over a year now.  We love each other a lot; my boyfriend has 2 daughters one is 10 and the other is 4.  I love them both a lot.  Unfortunately my work place was where a senseless act of violence occurred; where a lawyer was killed and I was there when it happened.  Since then I know I have been different, because of PTSD.  I am able to function at work fine and have started going to counseling again.  But I know I have issues with temper and because of that I have pulled away from the kids.  His oldest daughter recently approached him and told him that she now hates me.  I truly can't help that I am different now.  My boyfriend has told me he loves me so much and wants us to be a family and that is what I want too.  So for now we have broken up until I can get some of my issues sorted out. But at the same time its strange because his oldest daughter and I would go shopping together, after the shooting, and everything seemed fine.  Like we would be having fun together and enjoying the day; but as soon as we got home she immediately pulled away again.  I almost feel like she manipulating my boyfriend because he has been giving me more attention since the shooting.  I don't know what to do anymore.  I am so hurt and scared of what my future holds for me, he already stated that I am who he wants to spend his life with and asked me to marry him; but everything is on hold right now until she starts to "like me again".

[RockRose]

What does your therapist say about whether you have PTSD?  I took the liberty to look up the incident you are referring to,  and it was barely 2 months ago.  Most often,  people recover from trauma without the long lasting PTSD after affect - and you're in a very early window.  The fact that you can still function effectively at work and are going to counseling indicates you will probably recover very well - and normally - after this awful trauma you witnessed.  Are you getting enough physical exercise?

[hock02]

Trying to but since everything with my boyfriend has happened I haven't been eating and have passed out a number of times in the last week from stress

[specialmom]

I'm sorry you went through a traumatic experience and PTSD resulted.  Definitely work with the counselor on this.

This just might not be the right relationship for all involved right now.  He has young kids and they really need someone that is coming into their life to be emotionally healthy.  I say that with kindness.  He has to pick the right person to be in his kids lives.  Whether his daughter is manipulative or not doesn't really matter.  It wouldn't change anything in that it is still something she is telling her dad she doesn't want.  

My best advice is to work on you right now.  Recover and maybe this will get better.  But there is also a very good chance it won't.  He has more than just himself to think about.  But I'm sorry about that.  good luck hon

[hock02]

He says that is a chance and this isn't what he wants and still wants the future we have planned but I just need time. I can't help it. and if we are family shouldn't families stick together? I think you are off base