Want to have kids but..

[theflowers]

im 25  with no kids. ive been thinking about having kids one day...(hopefully in my 30s). I think that i would be a really great mom but theres a small part of me that doesnt want to have kids because of fear of becoming a single mother and because of the fact that this world is so crazy filled with a lot of crazy people. I want to be married when i have kids but a fear of mine is having kids with a man that isnt going to be involved and will leave all of  the responsiblity to me...this makes me not want to have kids at all. I dont want to be a single parent.

my question is how do i get over this fear and did you have similiar thoughts at one point? I think that i have this fear because its hard to find a good guy that is responsible.

[maltapaceberry]

Hello am 22yr am a single mum becouse me and my fathers baby are unmeried yet , listen i understand how you feel , first of all we fight a lot our relacship wasnt good before i got pregnent and after having the baby got worse it takes a lot of secrifice to wake at night to cope with a child puts a lot of money and other stres problems . Im not saying having a child .isnt nice becouse i love my son so much i die for him. But you should be with a guy for at least 5yrs before having children see that he is a calm guy and suportive and caring and be meried first its an ugly feeling having children before being meried becouse now i all ways wonder that if he marrys me its becouse of our son , pls dont rush things you wouldnt want ur child to leave in an unloving evoyerment belive me its hard

[RockRose]

I don't think you need to "get over this fear".  Rather,  use this rational fear to guide you in the right direction.  

Keep your eyes completely open with guys you date,  and choose one who is going to be an excellent partner and lifelong dedicated companion.

The ways to judge that,  are looking at his past behavior,  his current behavior,  his family and his friends.  

Don't ignore what you see.  That's the biggest mistake young women make.  They look at a guy and see who he is and decide they can change them.

Pick a guy you don't have to change.  ;D

Best wishes.  I'm celebrating my 30th anniversary next spring with a great man.